Ring Any Bells?
by DragonQuester
Summary: Yuppers, this fanfic will continue as planned this summer. No new fanfic will be created, it will continue on here. Noyem will finally lead Jay and the others into the Lekeya mansion.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Tales of Legendia. I really wish I did but I killed my magic genie before he could grant me my three wishes. I asked him for more wishes first and he told me no he couldn't do that so I shoved the magic lamp up his- Anyway enough talk about killing magical spirits that can found in old folk's medicine cabinets, time to talk about my story for Tales of Legendia. It's going to focus mostly on Jay's back story. Or what I made up of Jay's back story. I enjoyed his character quest the best and after I finished it I got the idea for this story. And I apologize before hand to sadly say, I will not make gay Jay. I mean Jay gay. Gay Jay. Jay gay. Hey that's fun to type. Gay jay! Jay gay! Gay Jay! But really, at the end I thought it was sweet how Grune hugged everyone and then when she stopped Jay went over and hugged Moses. I thought that was sweet too but then I was all like: EWWWW. Why do they have to hug all slowly and so close? I mean sure they're like brothers but still it was a bit…wrong. OK enough stupidity, anyway (if you haven't already noticed my favorite word to use is anyway) I got the idea from Jay's bell. Of course, I know you can use Jay's bell in the customization thingy but for this just pretend that it wasn't used. Also this takes place after you defeat the entire game, from the main plot to the character quest. So if you're confused about anything go back to your PS2 and keep playing Tales of Legendia. And don't complain about Schwartz being too hard to beat. Schwartz is the final boss battle so of course she's hard to beat! The grade I got on that battle was like -5.98 or something, mostly because I used items too much and Jay died like 20 times. Damn Jay always dies, freaking ninja loser. But he is better than Chloe, she dies quicker and when she dies I wonder what Senel is thinking when he sees her body... I swear only Moses, Senel, Grune, and Will were the characters that never died in my game. They were like resistant to death or something. ANYWAY, (yeah sorry I'm rambling so much, I like rambling) I know nothing of any tales series before Tales of Legendia so I'm afraid none of the little seed/summon spirit things will be mentioned (because I know NOTHING about them). And if there already is an explanation for Jay's bell someone tell me please. AND if someone in some other fan fic I haven't read yet (I've only read a few)has an explanation for Jay's bell, don't kill me, or at least don't kill me until I write out my will (my gerbils get EVERYTHING) Sorry. ALSO ( I swear this is like the second to last sentence of my rambling) maybe if I finish Jay's story I might move on to others like Moses, Norma, or Will's but that's only if I finish this one (which believe me that is probably not going to happen). SO finally the end of my rambles, so if you want go ahead and exit out of this or continue reading if you think you can survive… my HORRIBLE WRITING SKILLS! (dramatic music plays in the background while wolves howl)

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Jay moved through the silent streets of the Oresoren village. Night had fallen and only a faint glow radiated from the homes of the residential otters. The lights that usually brightened up the cave in the daytime had been turned off, there was no sense in leaving them on at 11:30 at night. Occasionally though one faulty light bulb would flicker on, showering a bright white light onto the path that led to Jay's home.

Jay strained to keep his eyes open. He was so exhausted he didn't even know why he had bothered to come all the way out to the Oresoren village. Norma had offered to buy him a room from the inn (for the great price of 4 gald) and had said she would be happy to take only the small, small price of 50,000 gald as thanks from him for her kindness. Jay had passed on that offer. Will said he could stay at his house, but since Harriet would be the one to make breakfast there Jay had quickly passed on that offer. Moses told Jay he could use a tent where his boys were camped as long as he didn't complain about the smell. Jay had first insulted Moses than told him no. Senel offered his couch at his home but Jay just said no thanks. So Jay had ended up going back to his own home in the Oresoren village.

Thoughts had been whirling through Jay's head. First the Cradle of Time, the practically endless trials, the battle with Schwartz, then the loss of Grune…Jay had pretended to be strong after Grune had left them, but it was only an act. He had tried to act as if he had accepted what had happened but still the memory was replaying through his thoughts. Senel, Will, Chloe, and Shirley had lost a dear friend. Norma had lost her best friend. Moses had lost his eye candy-who was also a friend to him. But Jay felt as though he had already gone through such a loss before. A loss of someone important to him but why did the pain feel so familiar somehow? Why did Grune's leaving arouse something that he couldn't even describe, yet alone remember?

Jay was in such deep thought he didn't even realize that he was at the door of his home. The window above the door glowed from a light that came from within the small circular house. The strange mechanisms that surrounded the home were turned off causing an eerie silence in the air that was usually filled with hammering and clinking from Poppo's inventions. Jay barely had enough energy to stand on his feet and was too exhausted to be unnerved by the unnatural silence. Jay summoned the last of his strength to open the door and walked into the house he shared with the three otter brothers. Pippo, Quppo, and Poppo were sitting on the otter face rug apparently looking at something that was laying on its back in front of them. Jay tried to see whatever it was they were looking at but before he could get closer he blacked out. He fell on the rug expecting to feel the warm and comfy fabric beneath him but instead felt something else entirely different. Jay woke up from his torpor and tried to feel his way off the wrinkle in the rug or whatever it was beneath him. An arm…Jay's hand moved up from there…a neck…Jay's hand moved down across the chest and felt…something round and firm?

Jay was harshly kicked off from whoever he was on. Jay's body slammed into Quppo's punching bag and he was left staring at a very, incredibly, mad girl. "Who are you?" demanded Jay, still shocked at landing on (and accidentally groping) whoever this girl was.

"This is Noyams," replied Pippo, sleepily. He was sitting beside the girl and had really been napping, just sitting up, until he had heard Jay's body harshly hit the punching bag. "We found her outside the village about an hour ago," added Quppo lazily as he rubbed one eye with a paw.

"No yams?" said Jay slowly. He looked at the girl. She was dressed in a blue dress with a thin white sleeveless jacket wrapped around her like a blanket. She had light redish brown hair that hung shoulder length and bright amber eyes. She looked about his age. The girl looked back at Jay with a disgusted look on her face, she backed away from him without saying a word.

"We don't think she can speak. She tried earlier but no sound came out," said Poppo. He yawned and gave out a faint 'ors.' "Maybe you can help her, Jay! She was wandering-"

But Jay couldn't hear whatever the otter was about to say. His vision was starting to blur and he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer. He tried to stand up again but exhaustion pulled him down. Jay tried to keep consciousness but instead his eyes shut closed as he blacked out for a second time.

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Noyam stared at the collapsed boy in front of her. He looked like a freak among freaks. Raven black hair tied into a side ponytail along with an outfit that looked like it belonged to a Brittney Spears backup dancer. And along with that he was short and even worse the shortie was a pervert! As soon as he walked in the door he attempted rape! He had landed right on top of her and tried to have his little short man way with her! And right in front of the ultra hairy little children! If he didn't look like he was half dead already Noyam would have beaten the living crap out of him.

"JAY!" yelled Quppo, Poppo, and Pippo. They rushed over to him and began crowding around him. Noyam got up and walked carefully over to him. Jay was completely knocked out and no matter how much the Oresoren brothers yelled his name he probably wasn't going to wake up. "C'mon we need to take him up to his room," said Quppo. All three tried to lift him up but they only got the body a few inches off the ground. Noyam couldn't stand seeing the furry little kids struggle with getting the unconscious Jay up. She went over to them and helped them by supporting Jay's head while they grabbed his feet. "Thanks, Noyams!" squeaked Poppo. "Jay's room is right upstairs." Noyam looked at stairs that wound around the living room. She was tired and imagining herself dragging Jay up those stairs made her even more tired. She sighed. _This pervert isn't very light either,_ she thought sourly.

With Noyam going first with Jay's head in her hands and the otters supporting Jay's legs, the group made a slow trudge up the steps.When they reached the otter's kitchen, Pippo let go of Jay's left leg (which he had been carrying with Poppo, Quppo had the right) and ran ahead of the group to open the door to Jay's room. Noyam laid Jay's head down softly and felt his forehead. He was burning up.

Noyam looked at the kitchen. The sink was crowded with plates and bowls that had the remains of food crusted on them. She looked for a cloth she could use but couldn't find one among all of the clutter. She turned to the otters and was about to ask them when she remembered that she couldn't speak a single word. She would have to act it out.

Quppo and Poppo stared at Noyam confused. She was flailing her arms like a complete lunatic. She stopped and began mimicking the action of putting something across her forehead. "Oh! I love this game!" said Poppo. "How many syllables does it have?" Noyam looked at the otter stupidly. She shook her head and mimicked the same action again. "Um…crown? Headgear? Uh, maybe hat? No, scarf! I mean, bandanna?" guessed Poppo. He rested his head on one paw as he continued making guesses. "Oh…maybe it's brain? No..ohh I can't think of what it could be! Just tell me!" Noyam gave the otter another dumb look. "Oh yeah. Sorry, never mind," apologized Poppo.

"Is it…cold compress?" answered Quppo. Noyam nodded and pointed to Jay's forehead. "OH! Jay needs a cold compress! I'll get it," said Poppo happily as he began rooting through the kitchen. Quppo was about to lift Jay's leg again when Noyam decided that it would be faster if she carried him. She took Jay's legs and while still supporting his head she carried him upthe remainder of the stairs. "_Heavy…Brittney Spears…backup dancer," _panted Noyam to herself until she reached the top floor. Jay's room was as strange as the otter's living room, there was hardly any detail that a _normal_ human lived there. There was only a bed and small table alongside the other wall that looked like it wasn't bought at the Oresoren furniture depot. Noyam carried Jay across the room and dumped him on the bed. Quppo and Pippo walked towards Noyam and stood beside her.

"Thanks a lot for bringing Jay up here!" said Quppo with an additional 'ors.' "Yeah it would have been hard for us to carry him up here by ourselves," added Pippo. As if hit by a sudden thought, Pippo reached under Jay's bed and pulled out a blanket and pillow. He laid them on the floor beside the bed and with a few other blankets he found in a set of drawers he created a small pallet. "Here you go, Noyams, you can sleep on this for the night," Pippo proudly presented Noyam the sleeping pallet. Noyam smiled thankfully at the otter.

"Here's the cold compress!" announced Pippo happily as he ran forward and laid the cold rag on Jay's forehead. Noyam stared at the little otters. "_Why do they care about this freak so much?"_The otters yawned in unison and rubbed their eyes. They were as exhausted as everyone else."Nighty, nighty, Noyams! Nighty, nighty, Jay!" said the otters. They walked out of the room leaving Noyam alone with Jay. Noyam gave Jay a cold stare. She was sure he was asleep but just in case she took her pallet and dragged it until she felt that it was far enough from Jay and his touchy little hands. The pallet was near the railing of the banister, as far as she could get it without leaving the room.

Noyam was about to fall asleep until she remembered that she was still wearing her boots. She heaved them off and then decided to take something out of the side pocket in her dress. It was a ornately decorated hand mirror with a back and handle made out of white marble. The design of a beautiful white rose was carved into the back with other small petals and thorns extending to the end of the handle. The glass was smudged with dirt and fingerprints but the mirror still looked like it would have fetched a large price.If she hadn't taken it out of her pocket she could have laid on it and broken the glass the completely. She put it down carefully next to her boots then snuggled deep under the blankets. Noyam breathed in the musty smell of the old bed sheets. She hadn't slept in a bed or anything close to a bed in awhile so she was thankful for the comforting feel of the warm covers. She stared at the ceiling as she contemplated her thoughts. She was in a stranger's home, sleeping in a stranger's room, being called No Yams by a bunch of annoyingly cute little otters. She remembered how earlier she had tried mouthing the name 'Noyem' to the otters several times but they just kept calling her Noyams (even the damn author was calling her Noyam). And then that weirdo had fainted on her! What type of person faints without seeing where they're going? OK, well maybe he was unconscious but still he could moved a little bit before landing on her. Noyam sighed. She was no closer to finding what she was looking for and now she had lost the ability to speak and worse she was in territory she wasn't familiar with. "_Well, at least things can't get any worse,"_ the thought drifted into Noyam's mind as she closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep.

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AFTERWORD: OK. Here you go this is my first Fan Fic. Not grade A (or B, or probably C) and it was kinda a test...to make sure my comp could even load these documents. And it worked. YAY! Sorry it's kinda short and kinda...random. I'll write more if anyone takes a interest to it. Or I might just write more for the hell of it, haven't really decided. Sorry if words bunch together, it just won't stop doing that...

Jay:You messed everything up on your first try.

Me: I DID NOT! (sobs sadly)

Jay: (reading fan fic) And what is this? Noyams? What type of name is that? And, BRITTNEY SPEARS BACK UP DANCER? What? How? So you have seen one of her music videos?

Me: Kinda...or at least I think so...I was watching TV and this blonde lady was singing and people in the background were dressed in sparkly clothing! As for the name it was the first one that came to mind.

Jay: Then something is seriously wrong with your mind...

Me: Well, I guess that is kind of true (little birdies and duckies dance around my head). Well thanks for reading this, people, if you are reading this..I might post the next one up so if you want to read that.

Jay: Please,don't. It gets really freaky.

Me: Shut up. Why the hell are you here?

Jay:I'm not here, you're having a mental arguement with yourself.

Me: (sighs) I thought so...second time this week, gotta tell the doctor...

Anyway, that's all for now folks!


	2. Chapter 2

OK I spent from 10:00pm all the way to 4 in the freaking morning writing this chapter and I think I went cross eyed from staring at the screen too long…or at least nearly, my eyes were like bleeding with pain. Anyway, I do not own Tales of Legendia. If I did I would probably be a lot richer. In fact if I was rich I could throw my sucky little computer away and finally buy: (heavenly music plays in background) A LAPTOP! So far I have saved twenty nine dollars for a laptop…that just means….about $888 more to go. So close! Anyway, I must thank the people who read my first chapter. (Grovels on hands and knees) THANK YOU! And to the two people who gave me reviews (OK, one was my friend so she kind of doesn't count but thank you whoever that other person was I think C- something) THANK YOU! Anyway, here's chapter TWO! I never thought I would get this far. And for later readingnote: seafood for breakfast actually tatse REALLY good. (I'm addicted to Red Lobster) but it caused my cousin to puke.(She actually gave me the idea for the name Noyam,because we eat No Yams! And the name sounds better than Noshrimp. Yeah my cousin and me are WEIRD.)

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Things were worse. Much worse. Noyam opened her eyes and smelled something she dreaded, something she hated, something that could cause her to scream in mortal terror.

"Here you go! Fresh scallops and shrimp for breakfast!" announced Pippo happily balancing a breakfast tray in his hands. Noyam hated seafood and now she hated being woken up by overly cheery otters. She peered cautiously at the tray. Like Pippo had said the tray was a breakfast of fresh sea food, scallops lined up around the plate with shrimps placed decoratively in the middle._ "Puke City.." _Noyam took the tray and forced a smile. Pippo looked expectantly at her. "_Oh, geez, is he going to watch me eat it?…"_ thought Noyam. She raised a fork, stabbed the smallest shrimp on the plate and raised it to her mouth. Her nose filled with it's sickening smell. She opened her mouth tentatively then quickly bit into the shrimp. "_I think I'm going to be sick,"_ Noyam's swallowed the shrimp as quickly as she could and tried not to gag on the flavor that still sat on her tongue.

"Do you like it?" asked Pippo. Noyam nodded her head slowly, compelling herself not to puke. Pippo gave her a happy 'ors' then joined his brothers that were standing around Jay's bed. Quppo was holding a tray identical to the one Noyam had been given while Poppo had climbed onto the bed and was standing on Jay's pillow. He had taken the wrench off his back and was (gently?) hitting Jay's head with it.

Noyam took the shrimps and scallops off her tray and began hiding them under her covers as soon as Pippo turned around. She took the glass of water, praying that it wasn't sea water, and gulped it down quickly. Luckily the water was fresh and wiped out the taste of shrimp in her mouth. When she was finished with stuffing food into her pallet she put her shoes on, put her mirror back into her pocket, and walked over to Jay's bed. "You're through eating already?" asked Pippo, surprised. Noyam nervously nodded her head, hoping that the otter wouldn't smell the food through the covers of the pallet. "Then could you help us wake Jay? His friends might be coming to see him and he hasn't moved an inch!"

_"Wow, this freak has friends?" _But Noyam diminished the thought and examined Jay. One of the brothers had taken the compress off leaving Jay's forehead bare. She brought a hand up to check his temperature, it wasn't too cold (in case the cold compress had been taken off a little while ago that would have affected what she would have felt) or high so it must have dropped over night. As Noyam's hand moved away she glanced down at his hand. A strange cut was stretched from the back of his hand to his forearm. Noyam picked it up gently and examined it. The cut was deep and dried blood stuck to the edges of it. It wasn't bleeding at the time but it seemed like it should have, no bandage was wrapped around it and blood could be seen traveling through the vessels. It was as if a transparent skin had drawn itself over the wound. Noyam touched it softly and saw a green light glow from where she added pressure. She pressed on the cut harder. The green glow radiated more brightly and the entire invisible film grew green then faded gently as her hand moved away. "_This guy has been cured by an eren," _thought Noyam fascinated.

Poppo saw Jay's hand and hopped off the bed . He stood beside Noyam and rolled Jay's sleeve up farther. There were more cuts and even more bruises. " Quppo, do you have any scallop paste with you?"

Quppo turned his head at being addressed. "Let me see.." trailed Quppo as he put down the food tray then took off his blue hat. Quppo's reached into his hat and began feeling around for something until he found what he was looking for. He took his paw out and in his grasp was a small glass vial. "Here it is!"

Inside the bottle was a thick white substance. When Quppo unscrewed the lid the smell of scallops made Noyam remember her uneaten breakfast. "This is scallop paste! It works a lot like scallop gel but instead of eating it you apply it directly to the injuries. My little brother Poppo invented it!" explained Quppo proudly. Quppo poured the viscous paste onto Jay's arm and with the help of his two brothers began rubbing it in. Noyam was about to try and help until a knocking sound could be heard coming from downstairs. "Someone's here!" exclaimed Pippo .

All three otters replied with a sharp 'ors!' and scurried out of the room. Quppo was the last to leave and before he ran off like his two brothers he placed the scallop paste vial in Noyam's hands. "Can you finish rubbing this in? Thanks!"

Noyam stared down at the scallop paste in her hands, then stared at Jay. _"How did I get stuck playing nurse for this creep?" _She sighed and regretfully began rubbing in the scallop paste onto Jay's skin.

The white goop of the paste stuck to Noyam's nails as she searched for more injuries on Jay's arm. Two bruises the size of baseballs were on the front of Jay's forearm. Noyam rubbed some of the medicine on them and instantly saw the purple swelling dull down to a small, slightly discolored mark. She kept rubbing the paste on until she noticed a cut positioned on Jay's shoulder. She tried to pull up Jay's sleeve more but the golden collar surrounding Jay's neck prevented her from bringing it up farther. Noyam realized what she would have to do. She took the end of his shirt and began pulling it off. "_When those freaking little otters coming back I am going to HANG them for making me do this!" _

"Whoa, I hope I'm not interuptin' anything," a man with an eye patch covering the left side of his face was leaning against the banister, a big stupid grin spread over his face. He wore baggy zebra stripped pants but no shirt covered his bare chest. His tone of voice implied that he was definitely hoping that he _was _interrupting something. When he saw Noyam staring at him with utter horror he smiled even wider. "Aw, I didn't know you have a girl, Jay! I'm so proud of you!"

Jay had started waking up at the sound of his voice. "Moses, when did you get here? I thought- WHAT THE HELL?" Jay stared at Noyam, who was frozen in mid-action of taking Jay's shirt off.

"Didn't know you were the type to let the girl do all the work but I guess everyone has their different idea of fun," Moses shrugged and started going back downstairs. "I'll give you two your 'alone time.'"

"IT'T NOT WHAT YOU THINK YOU IDIOT!" screamed Jay. He stared back at Noyam. She dropped his shirt and put her hands up, dropping the scallop paste, like a caught criminal. Moses came back into the room and walked over to Jay's bed. "Who is your new girl anyway, Jay? Never seen her before," Moses turned to Noyam. "Nice to meet ya, name's Moses. Now how long have you and Jay know each other?"

"I just met her last night. I have no idea-" started Jay.

"BAD JAY! You don't make a girl do this after just meeting her!" scolded Moses. "I didn't make her do anything!" shouted Jay. "Then she forced you?" "NO!" Noyam interrupted the argument by taking the food tray off the floor and shoving the it into Jay's lap. Jay stared at his breakfast. "Was Quppo, Pippo, and Poppo up here?" Noyam nodded and picked up the scallop paste off the end of the bed. Then she prodded Jay's injured shoulder with her free hand. Jay flinched from the pain but he understood what she was trying to explain. "Not much for talkin' is she?" asked Moses watching the little scene between them. "She can't talk," said Jay. He had laid the scallop paste on the tray and had begun eating his seafood breakfast.

"Oh, she's stupid," concluded Moses. Noyam gave Moses an icy look. _"First he thinks I'm Casper the Super Pale Boy's girlfriend! Now he say I'm stupid!" _She brought up her foot and slammed it into Moses shin. And if you remember Noyam's wearing boots, very thick bone crushing boots. "HEY!" Moses clutched his leg and started jumping up and down on one foot. "What did you do that for?" Noyam smiled impishly and stuck her tongue out at him. "You probably are Jay's girl, kicking me like that. Bit too pretty for him though," mumbled Moses. "I told you already she isn't my girl-hey! What do you mean by that?" asked Jay. He was sitting up popping shrimps into his mouth. Noyam couldn't understand how someone could eat _seafood _in the morning. Moses folded his arms across his chest. "Well, you have to admit, Jay, you ain't the best looker. First off," Moses unfolded his arms and brought his hands up like he was going number with his fingers, "you're as pale as death. Two, it looks like you wear eye makeup. Three, your hair style freaks people out. Four, you-"

"Simply amazing, Moses, I didn't know you could count," interrupted Jay sarcastically. "Why are you here anyway?" "To get you of course!" answered Moses. "For what?" "For the party! C'mon Bubbles is making us all go. If you don't show up she'll probably come and drag you there," said Moses he saw Noyam just standing there, staring at them. "You can bring her along with us."

"Her name's Noyams," informed Jay. Noyam felt like smacking her head on a wall. _"If someone calls me that freaking name again I will snap!" _Jay noticed Noyam's look and smiled to himself. He climbed out of bed with the scallop paste in his hand. "Of course that isn't her real name, if the curse was lifted off her I'm sure she would tell us who she really is," said Jay, in his all knowing quirky personality. Noyam looked at Jay surprised. _"How did he know?" _

"Probably a complex silencing spell done by a monster of the diva or elemental eren family," Jay was putting a slab of scallop paste on his sore shoulder. He had simply gone over his gold collar and was reaching inside his shirt. Why Noyam hadn't thought of doing that earlier will remain a mystery. "I'm guessing you're either an aristocrat from Gadoria, since the Legacy is still close to that country, or a rich merchant's daughter by your clothing. You didn't come by port because Port-On-Rage is a ways off from here so you must be a runaway or you're lost," Jay finished applying the scallop paste and looked back at Noyam. "So am I right? Or did I miss a detail?"

Noyam stared at Jay in open mouth shock. Moses noticed that and sighed sympathetically. " Sorry about him, Jay is a little smartass I am so sorry if he insulted you," said Moses sincerely. _"Damn kid could tell my life story.." _thought Noyam as she shook her head slowly up and down. Jay ignored Moses' comment and kept talking. "Well, there is someone in Weritis Beacon who could help you with your curse. I guess you could come with us," Jay shrugged his shoulders causally and walked out of the room. Noyam remained with Moses beside her. He nudged her with his shoulder . "Well c'mon, Noyams, don't want to keep that Know-It-All waiting!"

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Jay, Noyams, and Moses exited the Oresoren village and began heading to the duct that led to Weritis Beacon. Noyam trailed behind Moses and Jay not wanting to get in the way of their conversation. She kicked up dust clouds on the thin dirt path and enjoyed the gentle rays of the sun overhead. A slight breeze rustled the air causing the leaves of the trees and bushes to sway gently. Noyam was about to stretch her hands over her head but stopped when she heard a sharp 'snap' of a twig breaking. Something was moving through the shade of the foliage. She put a hand to her pocket. Another 'snap' resounded in the air.

Jay and Moses, who had been arguing (duh) about something , stopped and listened. Another 'snap' this time more loudly could be heard to their left. Moses had his hand poised behind his back, ready to draw a spear. Jay was slowly reaching for the knife at his side. Another 'snap' this time more powerful could be heard getting closer.

"Don't you worry, Noyams, Jay and me will get this sucker so you just-What?" Moses stopped talking and stared at Noyam. She looked ready to fight whatever was coming, but that's not what stupefied Moses it was the fact that instead of a weapon in her hands she had a-

"Why do you have a mirror?" asked Jay. He raised a confused eyebrow and stared at Noyam like she could possibly be dumber than Moses. It was the same marbled handle mirror Noyam had taken out of her pocket before she had gone to bed the night before. The mirror was being held level with her waist. She was holding the handle but had the glass side towards her body. She looked serious.

"And I thought Shirley was crazy fighting with a quill…But a mirror? What are you going to do? Scare it with it's own reflection?" Asked Moses. "Your reflection would scare anyone," quipped Jay.

While Moses and Jay were beginning another argument and the monsters closing in on the group, Noyam took the end of handle on the mirror and pulled. A concealed blade gleamed in the sun. She took the knife out and held it in front of Moses and Jay. They stared at it dumbly. "Oh…well…stabbing enemies works," was the only thing Moses could think of saying. The snapping of twigs stopped and something's breathing could be heard.

Out of the bushes a peepit chick immerged. It flew up in the air, narrowed its small body into an arrow, and dived its sharp beak towards Moses. Moses stepped out of the way of the dive bombing peepit chick. He took a spear and stabbed the pointed end into the peepit chick's body. "Is this what was making all that noise?" he took the spear out of the body and examined the dead creature. "This is nothing, I was hoping for something more challenging." While Moses sighed, the dark figure of an egg bear shadowed over him. Moses looked up to see saliva dripping out of the monster's mouth. The egg bear brought up one massive paw and aimed it at Moses' head. Moses smoothly dodged the swipe of the deadly claws. His fingernails glowed slightly as he took his spear and aimed it at the monster. "YAHOO! Finally something worth fighting!"

Another egg bear immerged from behind Jay. It crept slowly up towards him stepping lightly to not draw Jay's or anyone else's attention. Jay acted as if he didn't know the creature was behind him. This gave the monster courage as he came closer and was finally in reach of his prey. It lunged forward to make the killer strike but in the speed of a blink of an eye Jay dodged the attack and moved to the side. The egg bear was caught off balance giving Jay an opportunity to take his knife and stab the beast in the side. The blow didn't kill it but it agitated the creature making it swing a clumsy arm at his opponent. Jay moved away from the swing of the bear's claws and leapt in to the air. Jay's finger nails glowed as he threw his dagger at the bear's throat.

Noyam watched the two fighting completely amazed at their use of iron eres. _"I bet I could do that…if I tried," _thought Noyam as she watched Jay finish off the egg bear with one last jab. She was so absorbed into watching them she didn't notice something that was flying right above her. A fully grown peepit was hovering a few feet over her, watching her closely waiting for the moment to attack. Since Noyam was just watching in open mouth fascination focused on something else, completely oblivious to everything else around her, any moment would be good to attack. The peepit summoned its strength and using its great wings directed a gust of wind towards Noyam. Noyam was struck down to the ground by the powerful wind and rolled out of the way just in time to avoid another attack. The peepit followed her movements in the air and swooped down to finish Noyam off with it talons. Noyam heaved herself off the ground and blocked the bird's foot long talons with her knife. She pushed on her knife hard causing the bird to stagger backwards and fall to the ground. The creature rose quickly though and went back into the air to attack again. Noyam knew she couldn't just keep avoiding the attacks so she dropped her guard and began thinking of a incantation in her mind. A magic circle grew around Noyam's feet and vanished into a ray of blue light. The ray moved in front of the bird and the feel of static electricity could be felt in the air. Suddenly ice crystals began forming on the line of blue light and exploded into a flurry of electricity and piercing ice shafts into the body of the peepit. The monster fell to the ground, dead.

"I didn't know you were a crystal eren," said Jay. He had been sitting on a rock watching Noyam's performance the whole time. _"Wait a minute, that asshole knew I was fighting but he just sat there and watched? He didn't even _think_ of helping?"_ Noyam sheathed her knife back into the mirror handle while giving Jay a cold stare. "What I find really strange though," Jay continued on, ignoring the stares of death from Noyam, " is that you didn't need voice command to draw out a spell. That is the whole reason for the silencing curse, to stop an opponent's crystal eres. How did you do it?" Noyam thought about that question for a good long time. She could have given Jay a long lengthy speech about it and give him the exact details. She could have boggled his little know-it-all mind. Instead Noyam just shrugged her shoulders.

Moses, who had just finished killing his monster a little bit before Noyam, was cleaning the blood off his spear. "What was that eres anyway? It was like lighting with ice in it." Noyam shrugged again and noticed something pink gleaming a few feet away from them. She ignored Jay and Moses and began walking towards it. It was a pink disk, covered with strange designs and shapes. When she got closer the pink disk shot up and floated in the air. Noyam jumped back surprised by whatever-it-was sudden movement. "Ever use a duct before, Noyams?" asked Moses. He put a hand on Noyam's shoulder. "They work quite easily, you see it magically transports you to Weritis Beacon. All you have to do is go IN!" At the word IN Moses shoved Noyam into the duct.

Noyam felt like she was being sucked upwards. Her body drew itself out until it was as thin as a spaghetti noodle. Noyam wanted to scream but as soon as she opened her mouth she found herself standing in an entirely different place. Jay and Moses were soon standing beside her. "Nice place, huh?" asked Moses. A wooden drawbridge was laid over a slow moving stream. The drawbridge led to a lively town where people were darting from building to building, and some were moving down a path that seemed to lead to the middle of the town. One girl among the crowd spotted the group and started moving towards them.

She was dressed in a yellow slinky dress that ended only at the top of her thigh. She wore matching yellow boots that were pulled almost up to the dress leaving only a little bit of leg showing. Her short brown hair bounced as she waved at Jay and Moses enthusiastically. "JJ! Red! Just in time!" Norma ran up, panting heavily. "Thought you guys would never come!" She noticed Noyam. "Who's she?"

"This is Noyams, I took her here to see Will so he could cure her of a silence curse," informed Jay. "Noyams…" trailed Norma she put a finger under her chin and concentrated. After a few seconds she snapped her fingers. "I got it! You'll be Yammy! Nice to meet you, Yammy, I'm Norma Beatty!" _"Yammy? What is that suppose to be, a nickname? From which abandoned side of her mind did she pull that out of? Well, I guess it's better than Noyams," _thought Noyam. "Wait, silencing curse?" Norma looked Noyam up and down. "So that means you can't talk right?" Noyam nodded her head. "Well your new friend Norma will help you out!" Norma took the wand strapped to her waist. A green aura pulsed from her fingernails as she muttered the words for a recovery spell.

"RECOVER!" A green glow came over Noyam's body. She felt the curse lifting until the green glow faded and gave out. "Well, can you talk now?" asked Norma. Noyam opened her mouth, but not a sound came out.

"Ohhhh," Norma stamped her feet on the ground, "I just learned that! I was hoping I could use it but I guess not. Sorry, Yammy, but I bet Teach will know how to fix you!" Norma took Noyam's hand and began dragging her through the street.

"Hey! Wait up, Bubbles!" shouted Moses. He and Jay began chasing after the two through the crowded streets. "Why is it so busy anyway?" asked Jay as he was elbowed by an elderly lady leading 15 or more children. "For the party of course!" replied Norma, she was pushing through the crowd causing anyone in front of her to either ram into her hand or jump out of the way. One man in particular dropped all of his food and fell into the stream thanks to Norma's ramming fist. "Everyone in town is coming? Geez, didn't know it would be this big," mumbled Moses as his hair was accidentally pulled by a three year old riding on his father's shoulders. "PINKY PINKY!" said the boy happily as he pulled a strand of Moses' pink hair out. _"Why am I even here again? And why am I being led by Madam Attention Disorder?" _thought Noyam as she watched another innocent bystander be thrown into the steam by Norma's outstretched hand.

Eventually the four reached the yard of a beautiful two story house. A garden was spread over one side of the yard with birds twittering next to an open bird cage. A small ribbon of smoke came out of the chimney showing that someone inside was cooking. _"It looks so peaceful, too peaceful for these random people.." _But as soon as Noyam thought that a shrill high pitched voice could be heard from inside.

"EAT IT! EAT IT! EAT IT!"

"Can't…I am utterly defeated…"

"YOU DIDN"T EVEN BITE INTO IT! YOU JUST LICKED IT!"

"Yes, and I humbly regret that…"

"OH! ARE YOU A MAN OR NOT? JUST EAT IT!"

"Looks like we came just in time for lunch," groaned Moses as he opened the door. The antechamber door was open so the group walked right into the living room. Two couches on the right side of the room were covered with goop from either batter or something else. An angry young girl was standing on one couch with a bowl in her hands, taping her foot irritably. A man with a glasses hanging askew off his face was sitting on the same couch, using a throw pillow as a wall to cover his face.

"TAKE THAT OFF NOW AND EAT THIS!"

"I might if you would tell me what it is."

"It's…It's….OH! Never mind then!" The girl jumped off the bed and noticed Jay, Norma, Moses, and Noyam. "They're here!" shouted Harriet. Will removed the pillow from his face. "Nice to finally have you with us, Jay. It's unusual to have you as the last one here. Normally Senel is the one who sleeps in."

"Hey!" A boy with white hair entered the room from the antechamber, a broom and mop in his hands. "I hope you know I cleaned your jail cells out of kindness, not for money," said Senel. He placed the broom and mop beside the wall. "Aw, you starting a maid service, Senny?" teased Norma.

"I helped too you know!" said a girl with a tight body outfit and dark hair. She was carrying a feather duster in her hands. "Yeah, by dusting the cell bars. I'm sure the next person to get thrown in jail will appreciate the dust free grip," scoffed Senel. Chloe folded her arms across her chest. "Well, Coolidge, you were cleaning everything so fast I didn't know what else to do!"

Someone could be heard laughing from the kitchen. A blonde girl peered behind from a hanging pot and smiled. "Senel probably just got carried away. Right, Senel? Wait, who is that girl behind you?" Shirley pointed to the hiding Noyam. Noyam looked at the group cautiously. Even if she could talk she wouldn't know what to say, she had never met so many people this comfortable around each other. "Her name's Noyams, she needs your help in gettin her voice back, Will," explained Moses. Will straighten his glasses. "What do you need? A recover spell?" Noyam nodded her head timidly. Will moved towards her while Senel, Chloe, Jay, Moses, and Norma went to the couches and sat down to watch. Harriet walked to the kitchen to stand beside Shirley, intent on finding out what was wrong with her bowl of…something.

Will recited the same words Norma had earlier and pointed a glowing fingernail in Noyam's direction. "RECOVER!" Instantly Noyam felt like something heavy was being lifted off her but as soon as she felt that she could speak the green glow vanished. "Did it work this time?" asked Norma. Noyam opened her mouth to say something but once again nothing came out. Will scratched his head. "I don't understand why it didn't work. Unless… Noyams, do you remember anything special about the monster? Did it say something or do anything strange when it cursed you?" Noyam closed her eyes and tried to remember the moment right before she was cursed.

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The knife dropped into the bloodstained grass by Noyam's side. She clutched her chest as she desperately tried to breathe. Something was constricting her chest, killing her on the inside. With every exhaled breathe the constriction grew tighter and tighter…Noyam could feel her body giving up, every breathe growing more difficult to take in.

A Victorian style dress you might expect to find on a doll rustled as the creature drew itself in closer. "My what a pity, so young and so much to live for too. I wouldn't kill you if you hadn't slain my sisters," the voice was cold and piercing. The wind blew the black dress upwards showing a rotting sordid hand of a long dead human. "Of course I don't mind killing humans. I absolutely love it when they scream or beg for mercy. Do you know how fun it is to kill? You must, you did it to my sisters!" the creature spat the words in Noyam's face while it took the fallen knife at her side.

"They attacked me, I had no choice…" gasped Noyam. "Please...I need to live. I have to… find him for… her." "Let me live, let me live!" mimicked the creature in a whiney high pitched voice. "You humans always have an excuse to live out your meaningless, pathetic lives! You are just-" The soft tinkling of a bell interrupted the ranting. The diva monster looked down to see a small gold bell tumble out Noyam's pocket. It stared at the item confused then smiled. "So you are _her. _The one we were not asked to kill. I'm disappointed, I was told you were better than this. But yet again you're still alive which I guess makes you luckier than others," the creature smiled at Noyam, showing a row of jagged teeth. It snapped its fingers and instantly the heavy air around Noyam was released. "I will leave you with a pleasant reminder of our encounter though."

"You just like hearing yourself speak," hissed Noyam, she tried to stand but was her legs gave out. She didn't have any strength to get up. "Indeed I love the sound of my voice. Don't you love yours too? In fact I think of one's voice is an irreplaceable treasure," it threw its back and laughed. Slowly it raised its head back up to face Noyam. A black aura surrounded the creature as it pointed its dead hand at Noyam's throat. "In fact, one's voice is like one's life. It can be silenced in one touch!" A black vapor poured out of the hand and began seeping into Noyam's mouth. Noyam coughed as the vapor reached inside the throat and settled there. She tried to scream but not a sound came out."A simple spell with a complex twist," taunted the creature. "Don't let the first boy you see be an ugly one…or you'll have to kiss him to make my nasty little spell go away!" The monster laughed manically andthrew the knife in front of Noyam. "And keep a close eye on that bell too."

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Noyam remember that piece of information the monster had said. _"Something about first boy…hmmmmm…the damn thing said something about kiss too," _Suddenly the answer came to Noyam's mind. _"Let's see the first guy I saw was…Oh shit." _

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AFTERWORD: Ok..finally done with chapter 2…FINALLY DONE…eyes in….PAIN. Sorry if the writing is poor (eh, it's always poor) in some of the middle and end, I was writing this at FOUR AM IN THE FREAKING MORNING. And if my attitude seems A BIT BITCHY it's because writing while trying to block out the sounds of Pewee's Playhouse in the background is HARD. Why did Adult Swim put that show on there anyway? I watched that when I was four. Anyway, the storyline is kinda getting somewhere! So thank you for reading! THANK YOU!

Jay: Wait a minute this is like one of those fanfic where the author pretends to join the party by being someone else.

Me: UGH! It is not! (my cousin would kill me if she read that! Character design for Yammyis based off her)But if I did have the choice to go into a video game or anime I would so choose FMA (CUZ OF RUSSLE! Or InuYasha so I could kill Kagome) And anyways,I had another idea for this story that didn't involve another girl but it was boring and I'm only doing her perspective because she can't talk yet. I have to let the people reading now what she is thinking. And anyway, did you want to grope a guy in the first chapter?

Jay: ewwwwww

Me: I thought so. AND ANYWAY, I'm gonna do your perspective in the next chapter and swich to someone else's when your story ends. Of course I don't know if I'll actually finish this one..ugh..I should have started with Norma's...I could have added Senel and Chloeness and other nessess sooner. Ugh, I am sorry people I will try adding that in the next chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

I do not own Tales of Legendia. If I did I wouldn't be wasting my time writing fan fics. I WOULD BE MAKING ANOTHER TALES OF LEGENDIA. ALONG WITH AN ANOTHER DRAGON QUEST! Dragon Quest 9...someone NEEDS to come out with a Dragon Quest 9..or I will LoSe iT! I have replayed Dragon Quest 8 like……8 times. I know that game by heart, no more than heart! If I died right now then you asked me while I was lying dead in my coffin about Dragon Quest 8 I would bore you to DEATH rattling on and on about how great it is. So if a Dragon Quest 9 does not come out my whole PURPOSE for living is like…dead. SO PLEASE! If ANYONE who is reading this knows if a Dragon Quest 9 is going to come out PLEASE tell me. I have to know. The ending mostly just focused on the screwy hero and Medea, although that ending (along with the bonus) was cute. BUT what about Jessica, Angelo, and Yangus? WTF happens to them? I HAVE TO KNOW! SO why can't a game about them (NOT that annoyingly silent hero) come out? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? why? why? why? BUT if any of you out there are lost in that game Dragon Quest 8 I WILL HELP YOU! Just email me. ANYWAY, thank you for your reviews Celechan, you are very nice person in this world full of three year olds armed with bobby pins. (Blood seeps out of my 24 injuries caused by bobby pins) And my friend Pichu, although she is just being nice to me cause I loaned my TOL game to her. Thank you, and to anyone else who bothers reading. Here is chapter three. Oh, and this may sound kinda stupid but I got to ask, what does _hits_ mean? Is that like negative comments or just how many people visit the fanfic? I am a newbie here and exactly offer a tutorial. ANYWAY, here is chapter three. OH! WAIT! I don't remember what Will's house looks like on the inside so I'm cutting a little details short. Hey, I suffer from memory loss…sometimes…especially when it has to do with school and my parents. Usually I watch too much TV (like..90 hours straight) and I say to myself: Hey, what was my mom's name again? What grade am I in? How old am I? Who…. Am…I? AND! This was done really really fast one day so excuse any um...mistakes and you can point them out to me so I can avoid them in the future.

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Jay straighten his back along the couch so he was no longer leaning on it. A speck of Harriet's mystery cooking had been stuck on the headrest and he had accidentally gotten it into his side ponytail. Now a lump of goop (that smelled like flour, salt, apples, something scraped off an 80-year old man's back, and peanuts) was lodged somewhere in his hair. He scratched at the left side of his head, acting like he had an itch, and felt around until he could feel the sticky stuff stuck at the ends of his ponytail. He pulled it out. _"What is this suppose to be anyway?" _Jay examined the batter stuck between his fingers. _"Peanut flavored cake batter? Well, I'll give points to Harriet for being creative, but nothing else." _He wiped his fingers on the edge of the couch. While Jay was still trying to un-stick his hands from the cohesive mix, Moses nudged him with his shoulder. "Hey, Jay, I think your girl is lookin at you. And lookin at you in a GOOD way."

"What are you talking about?" Jay turned to face Moses who was sitting beside him on couch. Moses grinned and pointed to Noyam. "Just look at her! She won't stop staring at you!" Senel, Norma, and Chloe, who were sitting across from Jay, gave Moses a dumbfounded look. "I think the sky would rain flying pigs before anyone would become JJ's girl," scoffed Norma. "Norma! Don't be THAT harsh," scolded Chloe. "But she is staring at you weird," said Senel as he motioned his head in Noyam's direction. Jay looked at Noyam. She was giving Jay a look of utterly, disgusted, repulsion. _"That is suppose to be a good look? Looks like she wants to kill me."_

As Jay's eyes moved away, he accidentally glanced at Shirley. She was standing in the kitchen beside the wannabe be cook Harriet. When she saw Jay looking at her she smiled and waved a little. Jay yanked his head away and turned around, his usually overly pale complexion turning bright red. Jay had noticed that ever since he and Shirley had escaped Mirage Palace together, he had been feeling _uncomfortable _around her. He hadn't spent any time with Shirley, alone, after that but hewished he could. He wanted to thank Shirley for helping him but whenever he went around her he felt like his tongue had turned to lead. Now he couldn't even stare at her without blushing. _"Technically, Senel and Shirley aren't a couple so that means..Wait, why am I thinking that?" _Jay shook his head to clear his thoughts. He hated it when he didn't know what another person was thinking. He hated it even more when he didn't know what he _himself _was thinking.

"I'm sorry, Noyams," apologized Will. He was rubbing his hand against his chin, confused by the strength of silencing curse. "I know of other remedies that might work. Panacea bottles could work or I have heard that licking the skin off a live dragon cures powerful curses. I don't know how you could do that to a live dragon but…" Will trailed off when Noyam held up her hand to stop him from brattling on. She moved over to the couches and nodded towards Jay. Moses elbowed Jay, hard. "Jay! I think she wants to see you!" teased Moses as he shoved Jay off the couch. "What is it?" asked Jay. But Noyam just grabbed him by the shoulders and propelled him to the middle of the room. She opened her mouth as if to explain something but stopped and sighed. Thelook I-wish-I-could-kill-you was still on her face, Noyamshoved Jayagainst the wall.She leaned closer to him and…. Kissed him.

Jay stood completely still. He didn't anticipate anything like it. How could he? How could anyone? Unless of course you're a really good looking guy and girls (and gays) stop to make out with you wherever you go, so then you would anticipate it. But Jay isn't a really good looking guy who makes out with girls (and gays) wherever he goes, in fact he had never been kissed before. So being kissed was like a was a completely new experience for him. But of course Jay knew about the birds and the bees (learned so from the Oresoren, they call it the scallops and the octopi) so he knew what a kiss meant. And Jay did not want to kiss Noyam, he definitely did not want to kiss Noyam.From what Jay knew about kissing was that it happened naturally with someone you love,what Noyam was doing didn't seem naturally or lovey dovey.Everyone, other than Harriet who was snickering like a child who had snuck into an R-rated movie, just stared at the two. But as soon as the short 3 second kiss started, it ended. Noyam pulled away from Jay. "That had to be the worse thing I have ever done in my whole life. Like kissing a freaking brick wall, no a brick wall would have been better" Noyam wiped her hand across her mouth. Her voice was surprisingly very crude.

Norma exploded in laughter. "I've hear of love at first sight, Yammy, but what did you see at first sight in JJ?" Noyam stuck out her tongue, disgusted. "I don't like Jay Boy here, the stupid monster told me to do it!" She flipped back a lock of hair and adopted an innocent look. "Noyams! You can talk!" exclaimed Moses. "Yes, thanks to the help of Jay here," Noyam gave Jay a flirtatious smiled then flopped down on the couch next to Moses. "Now I am starved! Kid, can you bring me some food here?" Noyam nodded her head to Harriet. "Sure!" replied Harriet happily.

Chloe stared at Noyam quizzically. "You kind of seem familiar, have we met before?" "Sorry don't know you," said Noyam simply. Harriet rushed over carrying a basket over loaded with biscuits and bread. Noyam took one and bit into it. "So the curse wore off after you... acquired the help from Jay?" asked Will, still standing in his position in the middle of the room. "Yup, creepy monster said kiss the first boy you see and my curse would vanish," answered Noyam, a mouth full of bread.

"The monster…did it appear out of a black mist?" asked Senel suddenly. Everyone turned to look at him, except Jay he was still standing against the wall completely blank. A silence filled the room before Noyam replied. "Nope, no creepy mist. Why do you need to know?" "No reason, sorry for asking," said Senel quickly. Norma tried to brighten up the mood. "So the monster told you to kiss the first guy you saw?" "Yeah, it's a real pity it was Jay. I could have been anyone else from Mr. Shirtless here," Noyam nodded to Moses, "to Tall Hot and Gorgeous," Noyam nodded to Senel, "to even the old guy," Noyam nodded at Will. Will ignored the comment and looked off in one of his scholar nerd daydreams. "A monster who can cast a curse eres so powerful! Wow! Truly remarkable! It could be a cross bred of two species or-"

"Don't worry about him, he's like that," assured Chloe. "But I am worried about Jay. Is he going to be OK? He seems frozen…" "Blown off his feet by kiss no doubt!" bragged Noyam. Jay was still leaning against the wall, a horrified look on his face. Shirley stepped out of the kitchen and moved towards Jay. She gently poked him. "Jay, are alright? You look paler.."

_"She kissed me….she kissed me RIGHT IN FRONT OF SHIRLEY!" _

Jay snapped to attention. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Jay pointed at Noyam, stuffing her face with butter rolls. Shirley was knocked back by the force Jay had yelled with. Noyam shrugged her shoulders. "Nothing is wrong with me. It's you who's a little screwy." Noyam stuffed the remaining bread down her mouth and began moving towards the door. "Well, thanks, peeps, for helping me! I am truly happy I met such a weird bunch of helpful people!Hope to see you again!"

"Wait!" said Harriet. She rushed over to Noyam. "Don't you want more food? I can make more!" Everyone other than Noyam shuddered at Harriet using the words 'more food.'"No thanks, kid. But the food was great. Start yelling 'BAM' and they'll put you on the next Emeril!" Noyam waved while everyone waved back (except for Jay, he had went into the kitchen to wash his mouth out) and began moving out the door. She almost was out before Chloe snapped her fingers together. "I remember you now! You're Noyem! My cousin Gregory was trying to get engaged to you. He told me a few months ago when I went back to Gadoria," said Chloe as she got up and began walking towards Noyam. "Wait…Gregory Valens? That real fat kid?" Chloe nodded. "Yeah! He told me he went to visit this crudegirl named Noyem but she turned him down then almost killed him! You look and actexactly like his description!He didn't tell me the last name though.."

"I feel so sorry for you to be related to him. He was such a jerk!"

"Yeah he is a little high on himself…"

"Whoa," interrupted Norma, "what are you guys talking about?"

"My cousin is trying to marry into a rich family," explained Chloe. "So I guess he tried marrying Noyams, I mean Noyem." "Wait, that means you're the daughter orphaned of the family Valens," said Noyam. But as soon as she said it Noyam covered her mouth with her hand. "Sorry, didn't mean to spurt that out," apologized Noyam. "It's OK, that's all in my past now," said Chloe softly.

"Then you do belong to an aristocratic family in Gadoria. But that doesn't explain what you are doing here on the Legacy," Jay hadfinished violently washing his mouthand was talking to Noyam,who didn't look as happy go lucky as before the subject was brought up. "Well kind of…I guess. I wouldn't want to spoil whatever it is you people are doing," stammered Noyam. Will had sat down on the couch next to Moses and Shirley was leaning against the couch Senel was on. Harriet had plopped down on the floor. "You can tell us, Noyam, we might even be able to help you," persuaded Senel. Noyam sighed. "I guess, but my story isn't exactly cheerful and rainbow colored." "Whose is?" asked Shirley quietly. Jay and Chloe returned to their seats as Noyam stood in front of the group, nervously twirling a lock of hair in her fingers.

"Well, Chloe is right. My true name is Noyem. I was born into a rich family but even before my birth I was proposed to another rich family in Gadoria."

"Rich families? What they got no last name or something?" asked Moses. "Shut up, Red, and let her finish! If she doesn't want to tell us names she doesn't have to," whispered Norma as she kicked Moses under the table then looked back at Noyem to continue.

"Well, I was proposed until my first birthday. The son of that family had been declared dead and they weren't gonna pop out any new ones because the father died shortly after his son."

"So your parents had to find a new fiancé for you?" Senel was staring at Noyem confused, wondering if her story was getting anywhere.

"I didn't really grow up in my parent's home. I spent most of my time being taken care of by Mercy, the mom of the kid who died. I was sent there after I turned two and just visited my parents whenever they needed me for fancy dinner parties or just wanted to show me off. My mom thought I was more of an item and my dad was always too busy to ever even talk to me," Noyem scratched one side of her face. She looked too nervous to go on. _"She's hiding something from us," _thought Jay. _"Either she's lying or she's afraid to admit something important." _

"My mom started shoving other engagements in my face a couple of years ago. She took me away from Mercy's home and made me spend all of my time looking at rich bastards. I rejected all of them so you can guess my parents got kind of mad. So to get away from them I would run away and hang out with Mercy until my parents hauled me home. Finally I got sick of it and begged Mercy to adopt me so I could escape my parents, but they wouldn't allow it. I was they're property and to them Mercy was nothing but a commoner. Of course I was practically thrown in jail after that but I still didn't listen to them. So I made an agreement with them," Noyem stopped acting so nervously and smiled. "What's the agreement?" asked Harriet, her eyes wide with curiosity.

"If I find Mercy's lost son I won't have to marry any bastards that my mom throws at me!" finished Noyem. "But he's dead," pointed out Shirley. "Or at least you said so earlier."

"No one knows if he isdead or alive. He was kidnapped, everyone just presumed he was dead when they couldn't find him," said Noyem. "He was left in his crib then, POOF baby be gone."

_"I still think she is trying to hide something from us, some parts of her story don't make sense.." _Jay stared at Noyem intently. She had reverted from a nervous timid speaker to her former rude fast talking self. _"She's too relieved to be off that subject.."_

"So if you find him you're going to marry him?" asked Chloe confused over the vague story. "Only if he's really hot," replied Noyem. Her eyes starting watering with emotion and she clapped her hands together in a prayer pose. "Mercy has told me about how hot her husband was, so her son has to be a hottie too! OH! Just thinking of a poor cute guy I get to save by telling him his true origins! It's a story fit for a romance novel!" "OH! Yammy! You are so right! That love story would be so romantic!" Norma's eyes began watering and she had the same I'm-in-another-world look that Noyem had.

"Not much of a story if ya ask me," huffed Moses. He folded his arms across his chest. "Do you even have any clues to who the guy might be?" _"Ugh, it could probably be one of Moses' idiotic bandits," _Jay shivered at the thought. _"The whole group is made up of people with unknown backgrounds. Feel kind of sorry for Noyem now." _

"Um…it has to be a man so that eliminates at least half of the world's population. It has to be a young handsome guy so that eliminates some more people. And he has to be an orphan or something like that so that eliminates even more people. So, yeah I kinda have a lead," Noyem smiled as everyone gave her a blank disbelieving stare. "Well, I'll eliminate some more people! You!" Noyem pointed at Moses. "Are you an orphan?"

"No, my parents were-"

"You!" Noyem pointed at Senel. "Are you an orphan?"

"Yes but I remember my parents-"

"Oh well, 2 more people down a couple of hundreds to go," Noyem sighed deeply. "Wait you didn't ask Jay," said Shirley.

"I said hot guys. That automatically eliminates him."

"HEY!"

"Are you sure you don't have any other leads?" Will was polishing his glasses with the end of shirt then put them back on to see Noyem's reaction. "Well, not much but kinda…" Noyem reached into her dress pocket and squirmed her hand around inside. "I just gotta find it.."

Noyem pulled out her mirror and laid it on the table. "It's in here somewhere.." Noyem took her hand out of her pocket and began taking off her shoes. "I put it somewhere safe…" Noyem dumped her boots on the floor, lint and dirt littered the floor. "If only I could remember.." Noyem patted her butt. "No not there.." She reached inside her bra. "No wrong place again..."Noyem reached inside her dress sleeves. "Somewhere here.."

"You don't have it do you?" _"What a ditz." _Jay shook his head, pitying her stupidity. "VOILA! I found it!" Noyem took something out of her right sleeve. She cupped her hands around it and held it delicately. "It's one of a set of earrings Mercy wore. The boy is suppose to have the other with him according to Mercy's stories," Noyem spoke in a softer tone and gently uncured her fingers. She gave it to Harriet. "It's really pretty…" trailed Harriet. She passed it across the table to Senel. Senel held it up so that Shirley could see what it was from behind. "I don't think I've seen another earring like this," said Senel as he passed it to Chloe. Shirley didn't say anything but watched it as Chloe gingerly took it. Chloe only had it for a few seconds, since Norma hurriedly grabbed it out of her hand. "Let me see! Oh, it is pretty. Pretty expensive looking," Moses leaned over and nabbed it before Norma could say anymore "Bad Bubbles, I thought we told you about pawning others stuff!" Moses grunted when he saw it. "Looks like what any rich person would wear to me." Moses passed it to Will. "I recognize this design it can only be found in Gadoria and is, like Norma said, expensive. The materials a craftmans would need to make such an itemis a expensive enough,"Will trailed off andexamined it even closer.

_"With Will looking over it I'll probably never see it." _Jay leaned closer to Will and tried to see whatever 'it' was. When Jay saw it his entire body froze up, he couldn't believe what he was seeing.The earring was a small golden bell with diamonds embedded in the sides. The bell looked brand new without a single speck of dust on it and the needle that went through the ear wasn't bent or worn from being overly used. A faint soft sound resonated from the bell whenever it was turned. Jay felt as if he recognized the strangely haunting sound and was lost in his thoughts until a softhand laid on his shoulder. "Jay, do you still have your bell with you?" Everyone turned to see Shirley standing behind Jay. Her voice wasmild buthad a note of urgencey.Jay's mouth went dry so instead of replying he put a shaking hand into his pocket. He pulled outhis own bell. With Shirley still behind him and Noyemstaring atthem skepticallyJay tookNoyem's bell from Will.

Jay laid his own bell on his left palm. It was worn from the elements of the weather and misusage. Noyem's bell on his right palm was beautiful and looked as if it had never seen a single harsh day. At first glance both bells looked liked exact opposites, one new and the other old. But Jay could tell as he held both in his hands that his bell matched Noyem's perfectly.

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AFTERWORD: This is the suckiest of all of my chapters…I was so bored when I was writing it I didn't even pay attention to what I was doing…

Jay: You are beginning to suck more and more as time goes on..

Me: I am sick of your criticism DIE! (takes out overly large and comical looking machine gun and blasts endless bullets into Jay's body). Wait…OH CRAP I KILLED JAY! Who is going to be him now? Wait I think I has the solution….(takes out cell phone and dials in numbers) Hello? Michael Jackson? I have a job for you…it involves children so I was wondering if you'd be interested….you're not in court right now or anything right?…good…come on over then.

Michael Jackson: Hello? I'm here for the job interview.

Me: That's great! Now put your hair into a side ponytail, put on more eye make-up, ignore the dead body on the floor, and put on a purple clown uniform then come to my office.

That's all for now. Sorry no Chloe and Senelness yet but there will be….at some point. Sorry if anyone else had done Jay likes Shirley fan fics. You can kill me later for it.


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own Tales of Legendia. I don't think I could ever imagine a story so unique with….such strange characters (whoever thought Isabella and Curtis up are either genius or seriously need help). Ah, chapter four. Whoever would have though I would have gone so far…? (tear falls down my cheek) Not me. I thought I would give up halfway through chapter 1. But sadly to say it took me forever to think this chapter up so I felt like giving up. If you want skip through the cruddy beginning flashback. It's just a moment between Mercy and Noyem than a moment between Noyem and her mother (along with other people with kooky names). Really, it sucks ass skip or your eyes will bleed if you don't become sick over how crappy it is. Really, I mean this as a warning. DO NOT READ THE BEGINNING. DEATH MAY INSURE. Unless you're a thrill taker take it. Take it and bring a barf bag along with you. It will really make you puke. ANYWAYS skip the intro and go ahead and read (if you dare muhahaha) chapter four. Seriously, do not read the intro. I was watching _Finding Nemo _while I was typing it so I was a bit distracted and wasn't paying attention to what I was doing. And when I read over it I said to myself: "Wow, I should really retype that" , but it is so freaking long I just kept it. ANYWAY chapter four.

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_"Tell me what happened next! Pretty please! I want to know what happened after you were attacked by the monsters! Please!" A small child eagerly pulled on the sleeve of an elegantly dressed middle aged woman. The woman chuckled as she picked the little girl up and sat her in her lap. _

_"Calm down, sweetie," the woman straighten the girl's hair then sat back, a deep look in her eyes. "Well, where was I in the story, oh yes now I remember. I was kidnapped by the evil monster lord, Darkdread. He kidnapped me so he could marry me and force me to give him my soul." _

_The little girl squealed excitedly. She brought up her short legs and hugged them to her chest. An elderly maid walking through the room huffed imperiously at the sight. "Don't shove such foolishness in the child's mind, Madam. Her parents will not approve." The young girl stuck her tongue out. "My parents don't care so shut up!" _

_"Remember who makes your lunches, child," said the maid as she shook her fingers in a gentle scold. The girl took her tongue back in quickly and gave the maid a cute smile. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Weathley, I'll be nice." "That's better," the maid chuckled then left the room to continue her cleaning duties. _

_The girl looked back up at the woman. "So what happened after that? Did he really take your soul?" the child looked at the woman in wide eyed awe. "If he took my soul I wouldn't be here right now, silly! But he took me deep into his forest hideout where no other man or woman had ever gone to before, alive. Darkdread was about to start the ceremony but you know who came in at exactly the last second to rescue me?" _

_"Calix!" breathed the girl in admiration. "Yes! He killed all of Darkdread's guards then finished the powerful monster in one single blow. And of course, being the third time he had saved my life, you know what he did?" the woman's expression changed into a strange sadness as she finished the story. "He proposed." _

_"So you married him! And then what happened?" the girl was bouncing up and down with excitement. "We moved here," answered the woman simply. "But then…that's it? What about the monster before that and the black fire phoenix? You said they promised to chase Calix until he died! What happened to that? And that demon that never dies! What happened to him?" _

_The woman looked at the child sadly. "That's the end of the story. I'm afraid nothing exciting happens after that." "Tell me anyway!" pouted the girl. She had folded her arms across her chest with a look of pure determination, she looked as if she wouldn't move until she heard the last part of the story. The woman sighed, defeated. "If you want to know that badly, I'll tell you. We moved here to start a new life and after one year I gave birth to a single baby boy." _

_"Wait if you had a baby wouldn't he still be here today?" the little girl looked around the room as if expecting a child to crawl out and show itself. "No he's not here today. He's gone, sweetie." "Why? Did a demon kidnap him? So then Calix went after the demon, right? What happened?" The woman turned her head to look up at the ceiling. Tears were watering in her eyes. "No, he wasn't kidnapped by any demon. He was kidnapped by…fairies."_

_"Why? I thought you said fairies are good," the girl looked curiously at the storyteller. She was use to the woman telling exciting adventure stories with happy endings. She didn't understand why the story had turned so sad. "You know that fairies are attracted to anything that makes a noise as beautiful as theirs? So do you know what fairy talk sounds like?" _

_The girl nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah! Like bells!" she answered. The woman smiled weakly and took a single gold earring off. It was a small bell. "Yes, fairies love bells," she placed the bell in the girl's hand. "And the baby I had loved my pair of earrings. This is one of the pair." _

_The girl stared at the earring then pulled back a part of the woman's hair to see the other earring. On her other ear there was only a hole. "I don't have the other earring because the baby still has it," the woman patted the girl's small hand. "The baby would always take my ear and tug. He nearly tore my ear off once! So finally I took one off, removed the hook, and gave it to him. Of course I was afraid he would swallow the thing and choke, but he never did put it in his mouth. He would just look at it. I think he liked the sound of it the most, or maybe he was just attracted to shiny stuff. I'll never know," the woman sighed deeply. "Well, what about the fairies?" questioned the girl. "I'm getting to that part, have pateince," the woman thumped the impatient girl on the nose and continued. "It was a peaceful quite day so I took the baby outside. He was still just a tiny infant so I kept him in his crib. We were both enjoying the weather until someone told me I had a visitor at my door. So I thought I could leave the baby in the crib while I saw to the guest. But little did I know that when I left, the baby was ringing that bell I gave him. So can you guess what happened next?" _

_"The fairies came!" the little girl fingered the bell as she spoke. "Yes, they came, attracted to the sweet song of the bell. They tried to take the bell away but the baby held on tight. So they just picked him up and carried him off to their village," the woman finsihed abruptly. "And that's the end. Nothing else happened other than you coming here and demanding to be told every story I can tell." _

_"But! But…what about Calix? He went off to chase after the fairies, right?" the girl felt heartbroken. Never had one of the stories ended so quickly. The woman thought for a moment then continued the story. "Yes, he did go after his son. He traveled for thousands of miles until he reached the sacred fairy village. He found his son there, but his son had grown up in the fairy village, he didn't want to leave the only home he knew. So Calix decided to let the boy continue to grow up there. But as Calix was about to leave, he was stopped by the fairy princess. She had madly fallen in love with him and wanted Calix to marry her. Calix refused saying his heart belonged only to me and tried to wench himself away from the princess's grip. Instead of letting go the princess took out an elixir and tried to fed it to Calix. The elixir was a special potion, one that makes a person forget everything he knows in his life. Calix knew what the elixir would do so he kept struggling to escape but the fairy princess was far stronger than any human so Calix had no possible way to break free. Calix knew he couldn't live his life without me or his memories, so he took his sword out and sliced it through his heart. He took one last look at the fairy princess and said-" _

_"Wait a minute! Why didn't he just kill the evil princess instead?" the girl was near tears. Her favorite hero in the stories had died. And for a stupid reason too that she didn't understand. "Well, of course he didn't kill her. Calix took the code of gentlemen to heart: Never harm a lady," the woman laughed slightly as she looked at the small crying figure. "Now, now the story wasn't that sad." _

_"Yes it was! Calix died and you didn't get your son back!" stifled the child through her sobbing. "Well, I'm sure one day I'll see both of them again," the woman hugged the little girl close to her. "I'll tell-" _

_"I'll find you're son for you, Ms. Mercy! I'll bring him back to you so the story won't end so sadly! And so you'll be happy again," the girl wiped her tears away. She couldn't stand hearing the same horrible story again. Mercy smile brightened as she looked at the little child in her lap. "I'm sure you will, Noyem. Here, keep that bell with you. It will help you find him. Just ring it and maybe a fairy will come and take you to him." _

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_10 years later…._

_"DIE!" screamed Noyem. She shoved the teenager off of her. She had been attacked by monsters before but never a sex hungry 17-year old. The boy backed away from her his hands up in defense. "But if we're to marry-" Noyem kicked him in the crotch before he could finish. She redid her bra strap and hid behind one of the post of her four-post bed. She spat at him as she spoke. "What the hell are you doing in my room at night?" The boy just stood in one spot and stammered incoherently. Noyem finally fixed her bra and was about to kick him again until the bedroom door opened. "What is going on here?" a plump woman dressed in a satin nightgown entered the room, a toy poodle curled her in arms. She spoke melodramatically and looked as if she had stepped off the set of 'The Bad and the Super Ugly' with small squinting eyes and a tiny line of a mouth. "He tired to rape me!" said Noyem, still talking too loud and wearing nothing but her bra and underwear. "By the gods! Where is your night apparel, child?" _

_"ASK HIM!" screamed Noyem. The boy just stood and shrugged his shoulders. "This behavior is appalling! Young lady apologize to Sir. Gregory immediately!" Noyem stared dumbly at her mother. "What?" Noyem clenched her fist, ready for the argument that was sure to come. "Wearing so little when he comes to visit you is immodest! You should be ashamed!" Noyem's mother put her hand to her forehead as if the sight was going to make her faint. The boy, Gregory, took that moment as an opportunity and snuck away unnoticed. "I CANNOT TAKE THIS CRAP ANYMORE!" Noyem took a gown out of the drawers by her bed and slipped it on. "What do you think you're doing now? If you leave now the engagement-" _

_"I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE ENGAGEMENT!" Noyem shoved past her mother. "Where could someone like you possibly go?" asked her mother taking her by the arm. She drew her close and whispered in her ear. "You're lucky I found a fiancé who would take a wench like you in. If you leave now you will have no hopes for marriage and thus no hopes for staying alive!" "Let me go!" cried Noyem. "Don't you dare go crawling back to that widow! She is nothing and if you go to her you will become nothing as well!" her mother whispered the words so harshly the dog in her other arm tried to squirm out of her grasp. Noyem stopped struggling and reached for the weight she felt in her pocket. She put her fingers around its cold handle. "You were a failure when you were born and have brought more failure to us since!" Noyem's mother began dragging her out of the room. Noyem started to pull the blade out of the pocket. "I swear I will-" Noyem's mother stopped talking as she saw the silver of the knife flash by her skin. The cut was shallow and barely cut through the skin but the fat lady clutched her arm and shrieked shrilly. She dropped the dog and Noyem's hand. "YOU UNGRATEFUL SAVAGE! YOU WILL BURN IN HELL FOR CUTTING YOUR OWN KIN!" Noyem ran back into her room, not casting a single glance at her bleeding mother. She came out with the bell jingling in her pocket. _

_Noyem dashed down the hallway towards the winding stairs that led to the family parlor. Her hand slid down the smooth handle of the banister until she reached the private sanctuary of the still room. She hid behind the staircase to catch her breathe but stopped when a hand placed itself on her shoulder. "You aren't going anywhere." Noyem looked up and found herself staring at a large muscular guard. He took the handle of his gun and slammed it against her skull. _

_-------------------------------------------------------------------- _

_Noyem woke up in a dank cell. She looked down to see that her leg was chained to the wall. "What happened?" she mumbled rubbing the sore spot on her head. _

_"It's not a matter of 'what happened' it's a matter of what will happen," Noyem's mother stood outside the cell. Her arm was bandaged as if she had just come back from a war battle. "We need to discuss your future now," Her mother impersonated a sickly sweet smile. "What are you going to do?" asked Noyem. Her mother laughed at the question then rested her fat head on her non-overly bandaged hand. "You know I'm pregnant right again," said Noyem's mother randomly changing the subject. "Oh, I get it. You're going to keep me here until it's born then kill me and say it was one big accident. Great plan," Noyem tried to sound confident but her voice quavered. "I would never kill you! What a horrible idea, you have a very sick mind," her mother sat up and began moving towards the cell. "No, you're slightly valuable. Not much to gain by marrying you off but at least that will get you out of my hands," Noyem's mother reached her hand through the bars and took Noyem's face in her hands. "You were once such a sweet child…" she trailed off as if actually caught by emotion then stopped. Noyem yanked her head out of her mother's grip. "Don't touch me again, Rosal," Noyem spat out her mother's name. Rosal sighed. "I truly want the best for you, but you have been tainted by the awful woman. So I will give you one chance," Rosal leaned in closer. "If you can prove yourself worthy, I will give your life to Mercy." _

_Rosal reached into Noyem's pocket and pulled out the bell. She held it by her fingers and dangled it in front of Noyem. "If you agree to my little plan, you will be free." _

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Noyem stared at the two bells in Jay's hands. One hers the other Jay's. Noyem controlled herself to not scream in horror. Her plan had completely gone horribly wrong. _"This isn't happening. This shouldn't be happening. I don't want this to be happening…" _Suddenly she wished she couldn't talk again because now everyone, including Jay, was starting at her. She wet her lips and tried to talk but only a mouse-like 'eep' came out. Finally it was Norma who spoke. "You guys know we are kinda expected to be at that party…" Noyem took that as a cue.

"PARTY! Yes the party! All of you go that party! Go to the party and party! Go, go, go!" Noyem opened the door and began waving everyone out. "Can't miss that party! So go, go, go!"

"But-" began Senel. "PARTY!" shouted Noyem, loudly. She grabbed Chloe, Senel, Norma, and Shirley by the shirt and threw them outside. Then she took Harriet, Will, and Moses. "Go party extra hard for me!" "Wait! Don't you want some more food?" asked Harriet as she was thrown outside her own house. _"I don't think I could stomach anymore of that shit." _"NO! Just go!" Finally Noyem took Jay by the ponytail. "Wait-" said Jay feebly but Noyem silenced him by shouting another loud "PARTY!" in his face. She took the two bells out of his hands and threw him outside with the rest. She slammed the door behind her.

Noyem sighed, relieved. She glanced down at the two bells in her hand. The thin sheet of gold that had covered Jay's bell was gone showing a rusted metal beneath. The empty holes, that had once held diamonds in them, were filled with dirt. When Noyem tried to ring it only a flat 'thud' could be heard. Still, the bell was the exact design as hers. Jay had the lost bell. _"I don't think bringing that loser to Mercy will make her happy…" _Noyem sighed again and threw herself on the couch. Her stomach hurt from eating a shrimp for breakfast and Harriet's food, her muscles were sore, her clothes smelled, and now she emotionally depressed. "Things couldn't possibly get any worse," complained Noyem. But once again, Noyem was wrong, this time very wrong.

"HELLO, SISTER! WHY ARE YOU SO DOWN?"

Noyem screamed at seeing a purple haired man and women starting at her through the window. They were dressed up in violet cowboy getup. The two disappeared then suddenly barged into Will's house.

"When there is trouble there is us to keep it down! THE BANTAM BOUNCERS!" the purple haired man struck a pose as the woman kneeled down and spread her hands out as if presenting him. Noyem screamed again and ran out of the house. _"This place is filled with freaks!" _thought Noyem as she ran past the duo. "Isabella, do you know why the girl was so scared?"

"No-HIC-Curtis," replied Isabella groggily. Curtis noticed Isabella's hiccups. "Isabella, have you been drinking?"

"Yes-HIC-Curtis."

"Do you not remember your probation rules, Isabella?"

"Yes-HIC-Curtis."

"Isabella, you know drinking is wrong, right?"

"Yes-HIC-Curtis"

"And you know never to drink again?"

"Yes-HIC-Curtis."

"You learned your lesson this time?"

"Yes-HIC-Curtis."

"…Isabella, are you even listening to me?"

"No-HIC-Curtis."

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_"I need to get out of here," _thought Noyem as she ran through the streets of Weritis Beacon. The sun was setting so an orange haze covered the sky as the street lamps came to life. The celebration had moved to the center of town but a few people ran among the streets. Noyem carefully moved through the shadows of the buildings. The bridge was in sight and she was about to dash to it when suddenly she realized that she still had Jay's bell. _"I hate my conscience," _thought Noyem as a guilty trepidation spread through her. _"I need this bell but still.." _Noyem decided. She turned around and began heading to the plaza fountain.

When she arrived there it was much more crowded than she had expected. A table had been set in the middle piled high with food and drink. Musicians sat themselves in front of the grand fountain and were playing a slow melody. _"I find the creep than leave, just find him and leave…" _

"We need to talk." Noyem jumped when she saw Jay standing with his arms crossed in front of her. "Talk? About what? What do we possibly have to talk about? Nothing! Yup, we don't have at thing to talk about!" Noyem spoke her words too fast so it ended up sounding like she trying to speak an alien language from _Star Wars_. Jay ignored her (and the author's stupid simile). "Follow me," Jay pushed through the crowd and towards an empty corner by the fountain. Noyem followed him even though every nerve and fiber in her body screamed not to._ "Pretty girls shouldn't follow Brittney Spears backup dancers into dark corners," _Noyem sat down on the edge of the fountain, knowing that she would probably have to explain practically everything. "Well, what do you want? A full word on word history of your parents? A document proving that my story is true? A picture of your dear Mommy? Your birth certificate? Another kiss?"

A classic totally grossed out look fell on Jay's face. "NO! Please no, it was like I was being attacked by a rabid dog back there!" Noyem looked as though she had been slapped. "EXCUSE ME? I'll have you know there are millions of guys who would kill themselves to be kissed by me!" "They won't need to kill themselves. They'll be killed _by _your kiss," remarked Jay. "You are almost exactly like her! She would wisecrack about me whenever I asked for her advice!" Noyem mimicked a high pitched voice. " 'Don't worry about a guy ever wanting to marry you, pancake chest!' or her favorite 'The only reason guys come after you is because your mom puts a bounty on your head!'" Noyem stuck her tongue out and kept talking. "She use to be so nice when I was young but now it's like she goes out of her way to make fun of me!" Jay stared at Noyem, not sure on how to react. "Who are you talking about?" "About Mercy of course!" Noyem looked over Jay and suddenly realized something. _"He almost looks just like her, especially the eyes…Why didn't I notice before?" _Jay cleared his throat. "That is on the topic I would like to discuss. Do you know exactly how I was kidnapped?"

Noyem swallowed. "Um, but what if you're not the guy I'm looking for. I mean, you might just have that bell by coincidence…" "I seriously doubt that," said Jay. "I wasn't raised in Gadoria so how else could I have something like that," Jay looked up at the darkening sky. "Solon always told me that my parents had been poor and didn't want a waste like me as a burden. He told me I was lucky that he found me, that if he hadn't I would have died on the streets."

_"A waste…" _Noyem shook her head. "No, you weren't a waste to your parents. I know Mercy loved you and Calix too," Noyem realized that Jay didn't know who Calix was. "Calix was your father. But he died only a few weeks after you were born. It had started off as a simple illness than spread and killed him." Jay remained impassive as he kept staring up at the sky, Noyem went on. "He was the one who was going to name you but he died before he could give the name. But that's not important you want to know about the kidnapping right?" Jay didn't reply again. "Well, your mother left to answer the door so she left a maid to watch you but then the maid abandoned her post. And then when both returned a few minutes later you were gone. Everyone searched but there wasn't a single trace of a kidnapping anywhere. You had just disappeared. I'm afraid that's all I know, but I guess you were kidnapped by that guy, Shiloh."

"Solon," corrected Jay. Noyem was about to keep going with her explanation then stopped. "Solon? No that's impossible he was-"

"Let's go, Red, this couple is BORING!" Jay and Noyem turned to face Norma and Moses standing a few feet away, they had been watching the two the whole time. "You could have done somethin,' Jay, but I guess you just got no sense of romance," sighed Moses. "What are you two doing here?" asked Noyem. "We're on couple patrol!" Norma punched a fist into the air. "Looking for action! But you two are boring, all you do is talk." "So you want action?" Noyem smiled coyly grabbed Jay by the arm and leaned in closer to him. "Oh, Jay! Hold me closer!" Jay shook his arm as if a bug was on it. "GET OFF ME!" Norma and Moses broke off laughing. "What's so funny?" Shirley stepped out from behind Norma, an innocent curiosity on her face. Jay's face turned crimson and he opened his mouth to say something, but Noyem was still cuddling with his arm. "GET OFF MY ARM NOW!" Jay shoved Noyem off. Norma slapped Noyem on the back. "Yammy, since you make JJ uncomfortable you are officially one of us! C'mon we need to spy on our next couple!" "Next couple?" questioned Noyem. "Yeah, Senny and C, they ran off a few minutes ago."

Shirley's mouth twitched. "They what?" Her hands balled into fist. "Where did they go?" Moses shrugged. "I don't know. We were just gonna start lookin for them.." Suddenly Shirley began marching off towards the entrance to the plaza. "What wrong with her?" Noyem stared at Shirley as she pushed past people. People stared at the strange blonde teen as she determinedly walked through the group. "Shirl has like this internal sensor that leads her to Senny. She always seems to know where he is," explained Norma. "We'll have to chase after her if we want to see Senny and C!"

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"Thanks for walking me home, Coolidge," Chloe stood at the entrance to the hospital. The party could be heard in the distance along with the gentle sounds of the flowing stream near by and a single croaking toad. "No problem," said Senel. "I hope you start feeling better."

Chloe blushed. She had lied to Senel that she hadn't been feeling well in hopes that he would walk her home so she could have some 'alone' time with him. So far her master mind plan was working. She had wanted to make the night the one night she would confess everything to him, the one night where she would finally let all of her feelings go. "Coolidge, I'm sorry but-" Chloe choked up unable to go on.

Senel thought something was wrong with her. "Chloe are you alright? You're flushed ," Senel laid his hand on her back. "Here let's go inside so you can rest." Chloe blushed even harder when she felt Senel's touch. "No, I'm really fine. I-I j-just wanted to be alone with you for a little while so I could..." Chloe buried her face in her hands and tried to continue. "So we could talk," finished Chloe.

Senel smiled. "Yeah, we haven't talked together for a while." Chloe felt her heart pound. "No!" Chloe shook her head. "I need to tell you something important something-"

"ACHOO!" sneezed the bush.

"Shut up, Red! They were getting to the good part!"

"OW! Norma, that was my arm!"

"Noyem, will you please get off my hair!"

"I'm not on your precious ponytail!"

"Sorry, Jay, that was me."

"O-oh, it's OK then."

Moses, Norma, Noyem, Jay, and Shirley tumbled out of the shrubbery they had all crammed themselves into. They looked up at the couple. Senel and Chloe stared at the group with practically palpable waves of anger pouring out of them. "Um, hi guys! Red here was just teaching all of here that this plant..is..posionous!" Norma elbowed Moses. "Isn't that right, Red?" "Actually this is a healing herb," said Shirley. Norma gave Shirley the shut up look and looked up at the angry couple. "I guess you want us to leave, huh?"

"Norma, Moses, and even Noyem I can understand. But Shirley and Jay?" said Senel as he shook his head in disappointment. "THEY DRAGGED US HERE!" accused Jay and Shirley at the same time while pointing to Norma, Moses, and Noyem. Chloe and Senel kept staring them down. "Don't you guys have something better to do?" asked Chloe. Norma stood up brushing dirt off her dress. "No not really," she answered happily. Suddenly a dark shadow towered over the peeping five some. "H-hi, Teach.." started Norma but the threatening hand of bonks was already coming down.

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"Your friends are nice," said Noyem as she and Jay walked through the streets of the Oresoren Village. Will had ordered everyone to go home after breaking them all up after the Chloe and Senel moment. Since Noyem had no money for the inn she had decided to follow Jay. Jay had only agreed if Noyem would keep telling him about what they had discussed earlier. Also he only agreed to take her back if she would keep her hands off him.

"I guess," shrugged Jay as they moved past the small houses of the otters. They reached Jay's house and walked inside. They were greeted by Pippo, Poppo, and Quppo. "Are you two hungry?" asked Quppo holding out a plate with a lobster sitting stuffed with spices on it. Jay took it while Noyem ran out of the room with her hand over her mouth. Finally, after a nice hot bath in the spring behind the otter's home Noyem was ready to flop down on her bed. Or rather her makeshift bed, that was still located in Jay's room.

"You need to find a new place to stay," mumbled Jay as he handed Noyem another pillow for her sleeping pallet. "I'll find one in the morning," promised Noyem as she hugged the soft white pillow to her chest. Then finally, still hugging the pillow to her chest, Noyem fell onto her pallet. But instead of clean white sheets greeting her, she had the sickly smell of shrimp and scallops. She had forgotten that she had stuffed her breakfast into her sleeping pallet.

"Crap," cursed Noyem as she pulled a day old shrimp off her sheets.

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AFTERWORD: There how was that? And to Celechan, I took your advice. I put a flashback with Noyem and one of her callers in there (didn't really like how I did though). Of course I was watching a Disney movie while I was doing it, but I still laughed while I did it. Reader gets what reader wants. Especially if that reader is a reviewer. Not saying that anyone has to review. But if you want a request I'll try and add it in there. Well, FINALLY Senel and Chloeness. Not much but I KEPT MY PROMISE! (for once!) YAY! This calls for a Dr.Pepper!

Jay: Hello, Claire.

Me: WHAT THE FIRETRUCK! I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU! And why are you acting like Hannibal?

Jay: Fire truck? Did you pull that off X-Play again?

Me: Hey, I am a professional babysitter. Babysitters don't cuss. (child in background is sticking electrical cord in mouth) Oh, shit.

Jay: Professional what again?

Me: Oh shut up.

That is all for now, people. Oh and thank you KamikazeHikira (did I spell it right?). You're very nice. I like _Naruto _but I only watch it off Cartoon Network. I need to get the manga.

Sorry that this chapter actually sucked more than the last one. I will try to clean the next one up a little better so it will probably take longer. Anyway, for those reading, thank you!


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own Tales of Legendia. To whoever does I will buy it from you for $ .25 and take your laptop…No, I'll probably just take your laptop and leave TOL with you. Sigh, hell has started. Oops, not hell I mean the eternal suffering of pain and torture that kills any thoughts of indifference or joy. Of course by that I mean school. School, my archrival since I turned 6. School, the place where I had my self-confidence slowly stamped out of me. School, the place where that one kid sits there and wipes cheesy puffs in my hair. School, the time when I could be writing or learning how to draw instead of learning stuff I'll never use in real life. School, the place of all of my suffering. It just started this week and I must say….it has sucked. I only have one class with my friend. Other than that I am in classes with people that are WAY too smart for me!…Ok everyone is too smart for me but these people are like alien-like smart. This school year for me is going to suck!(cries uncontrollably in corner) ANYWAYS, on with CHAPTER FIVE! I am gonna try to make it serious. TRY. Key word here. Also it may be suckish cause school makes me EXHAUSTED! ANYWAYS, Chapter FIVE! Sorry it took longer than the others. I was to damned lazy to get it done after school sorry!

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Noyem languidly rubbed her eyes as she sat up. The sheets of her pallet were disarrayed all over the floor with the mattress she was on lying crookedly by the staircase. Noyem yawned as she looked around. No overly cheerful talking otters shoving seafood in her face, no overly pale MJ look-alike sleeping in the nearby bed, and no shirtless man accusing her of raping Jay. The room was completely empty with only the sound of nearby machinery sending creaks and moans into the still air.

Noyem fixed her pallet then began working on her appearance. She straighten her dress then looked around for something to brush her hair with. She knelt down on the floor and began looking through Jay's drawers. _"Let's see what we got here: briefs…didn't know he was a brief type of guy…creepy shirt….creeping matching shorts…man bra?- no it's just an undershirt (I think)…more creeping spring and summer apparel….Here it is, brush!" _Noyem pulled the brush out of the drawer and began running it through her hair. She snapped a headband in and pulled her waist length hair down.

Noyem began walking to the door then stopped. A horrible thought went through her mind. _"Oh god, the little hairy children probably fixed breakfast! I cannot stand to eat any more crap! First shrimp than Mini Martha Stewart's cooking! I suffered the outcome of those foods yesterday, if I eat any more I'll need an enema." _Noyem slowly opened the door expecting the smell of a fresh seafood breakfast. Instead the pleasant smell of fresh baked and buttered breads wafted through the air. Jay stood in front of the small sink on the alcove above the living room. "Here you go, Noyem," Jay dropped a white paper bag in Noyem's hands. "I went to Beacon Breads after I woke up and picked up some breakfast for you. Since you hate seafood and only extremely starved people could put up with Harriet's cooking." Noyem smiled at the memory of last night. After she had discovered the hidden shrimps and scallops in her pallet Jay and Noyem had spent the whole night cleaning it out. Noyem peeked into the bag. "OH! Donuts and buns!" squealed Noyem. She hugged Jay. "Thank you! Thank you! If you were moderately attractive I would kiss you but a hug will do." She skipped down the remainder of the stairs with Jay shouting after her. "HEY! What is that suppose to mean?"

"Good morning, Noyams!" greeted Quppo, sitting on the floor with a plate of (you know already) seafood. His two brothers sat along beside him with similar dishes. "Morning…sorry but what are your names?" Noyem sat across from them taking her food out of the bag. "Quppo!" replied the marital artist otter. "Pippo!" replied the barp playing otter. "Poppo!" replied the invenorourous otter. "Aw, you guys are so cute you could Furbies and teddy bears out of business!" Noyem grinned and began eating a donut covered in pink frosting. Jay came down stairs with two glasses and one dish with seafood and two buns. He set down one glass near Noyem then sat down next to her. "We need to continue our conversation from yesterday, before that idiot and Norma interrupted."

"Jay, I'm talking to the otter boys! We can talk all seriousness later," Noyem fanned him away and returned to the otter brothers. "So have you guys always been able to talk or are you enchanted or something?" "The Oresoren race has always had the ability to speak," pipped Pippo proudly. "But in the Oresoren records from long, long ago there seemed to have been a time when we couldn't talk so we may be enchanted," said Quppo. "No! We've always been able to talk!" insisted Pippo. "No! We're enchanted!" insisted Quppo. "ALWAYS BEEN ABLE TO TALK!" "ENCHANTED!" "ALWAYS TALK!" "ENCHANTED!"

Jay sighed irritably while Poppo broke up his brother's argument (it had turned into slapping fight). "Noyem, you were saying something important yesterday about Solon. Please I need to know." "Solon? Why do you need to know about a simple guy like him?" Noyem bit into a cream filled donut, spreading red jelly all over her face. At the name 'Solon' the otters gasped and froze in their slapping/argueing postion. "Jay, what does Noyams have to do with him?" Poppo quivered slightly as he spoke. The name had sent terror through him. Noyem noticed the otters' strange behavior. "Hey, what's wrong with you guys?"

"Solon was Jay's…mentor, he was a really evil person," said Quppo quietly. "That's not the Solon I kno-" but Noyem was interrupted by a very curt and sharp 'knock' on the door. "I got it!" shouted Poppo as he ran to the door and turned the knob. "Hello?"

At the door was a short squat man. He had beady rat-like eyes with thick greasy gray hair tied in a short ponytail at the back of his head. He wore a formal black jacket pressed over a white shirt with a blue bolo tie clasped with a strange emblem. The emblem was like that of a rose, with ornate thorns and roses covering the small space. When the man saw Poppo he curled his lip, showing two rows of straight yellow teeth. "I was told I should come here to meet an information dealer." He entered the house and looked around distainfully. Noyem gasped. _"OH crap! It's that dumb ass!" _Noyem quickly grabbed the paper bag and hid her face behind it. "May I help you?" Jay ignored Noyem's weird behaivor, stood up, and walked over to the man. The man eyed Jay. "I need to find someone named 'Jay the Unseen'. I was told I could find him in this dingy hole."

"You're talking to him," said Jay. He folded his arms across his chest and gave the man an equal brazen stare. "Well, Jason, I need to find someone named Noyem C. G-"

"HERE!" Noyem jumped up and waved her hand like a student with attention deficient disorder. Noyem walked up and squeezed between Jay and the man. She moved Jay behind her and gave the man a strained smile. "How lovely it is to see you, Mr. Wyllon." But at the tone of her voice Noyem didn't sound like she felt 'lovely to see him' at all. She said it more like a student addressing her dearly hated principal.

"Noyem, I come bearing news from Lady Rosal. She wants me to tell you that, 'Your time is up'" At those words Wyllon took Noyem by the hand and pulled her out the door. The action happened too fast for Noyem to react. Jay moved towards her but Wyllon slammed the door behind him and began walking quickly down the Oresoren street. "What? What does she mean by my time is up? Up for what? She's the one who kicked me out! HEY! Stop pulling me so hard!" Wyllon stopped and looked back at Noyem, a cruel grin spread over his face. "You are scheduled for three days from now. Nobody wants you to be late." "Late for what?" "Your execution, Miss Noyem. Nobody wants to see you late for that." Noyem froze unable to comprehend the words. Execution, the word didn't seem to fit in Noyem's mind. She stared blankly up at Wyllon expecting him to say more. _"Execution…what does that mean…why?" _Finally Noyem's mind snapped back together. "NO! I found him this time I really did! Please, Wyllon, just let me-"

"And who is the wannabe this time, hm? Another prince you flirted with? We are fed up with your games, Noyem. You have been let off long enough." Wyllon took a firmer grip on Noyem's wrist and whispered, his putrid breath running against her cheek. "You should have died a long time ago, Miss Noyem. A long time." Noyem struggled to free her hand from his grasp. _"This can't be happening, I know what to do now…I can't die…I.." _

A knife sliced through the air and cut into Wyllon's hand. Wyllon stared at it dumbly before he finally reacted with a guttural "Ughff." Wyllon let go of Noyem and fell to his knees. He clutched his injured hand. Blood spurted along the edges of the wound while the knife held firmly in place. Wyllon took the smooth black edge of the knife and struggled with it until it was free. His fierce scream broke through the silence as blood poured freely through the wound. _"What the? I have a guardian angel who likes throwing knives?" _Noyem turned her head to see Jay standing from his porch, another knife poised in his hand. "Are you okay, Noyem?" Jay ran up and knelt beside her. Noyem nodded and stood beside him. Wyllon stared up from his location on the ground, he stared at Jay with pure hatred. "This the new one in your collection? Another one to go show then dump somewhere like all the rest? You are a failure, Noyem, just like her," Wyllon gasped the words as he got up, his eyes still focused on Jay. Jay stood protectively in front of Noyem, his knife still drawn. With his bloody hand wrapped in his shirt, Wyllon staggered towards the cave entrance. Otters on the market street who saw him immediately stepped out of the way, their eyes downcast to avoid looking at him. They knew, without being told, to not offer any assistance to the stranger. After a few silent moments, the slumped figure was out of sight of the small village.

Jay turned to Noyem and smiled slightly. "Well, are you ready to talk seriousness now?"

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Noyem sat across from Jay on the food covered carpet of the otters' house. Pippo, Poppo, and Quppo sat to the side of the two, watching Noyem and Jay as if they were a tennis match. Noyem nibbled on a crepe while Jay cleared his throat. "I need to know more information about you before we start talking about anything else." "I like long walks in the park, maybe jogging on a sunset beach. Turnoffs, guys with mustaches and seriously bad ear hair. Also I don't like men who buy their clothes from 'Crap R Us'. Turn ons, guys with muscles but not like monstrous kill-you muscles. And guys who use cheesy pick up lines, those are cute,'" Noyem chewed on the end of her crepe and tilted her head sideways. "Wanna know what I thought of your kiss yesterday, Bricky Boy?"

Jay squinted his eyes at her. "Are you always like this or are you just trying to be funny?" Noyem leaned back on the floor, the last bit of her snack rolling along the inside of her mouth. "Always like what?" Jay shook his head. "Never mind. Just tell me about Mr. Wyllon. Who is he? How do you know him? Where does-"

"He is in charge of Rosal's guard. He has always had it out for me and secretly he was having an affair with Rosal under my dad's nose. He's an asshole who sucks at weapons and he just walks around showing off his position. Hand me some more food," Noyem sat up and held her hand out. Jay reached into the bag and tossed her a glazed donut. "So why did he come here? Does it have to do with you only or something…with Mercy?" Noyem bit into the donut and chewed it for a minute before replying. "My business only. All you should care about is Mercy related information." "You are Mercy related information. Anyway, I want to help you. Same with the others, we talked together last night and agreed to help you out however we can. If Wyllon knows where you are others might also. But since I seem to be…" Jay trailed off and looked away.

Noyem blushed. She had never met anyone who had actually said they wanted to help her. She swallowed and tried to raise her head to reply. When she tried she noticed how uncomfortable it was to meet Jay's eyes. She wet her lips before she tried to speak but she still couldn't bring herself to say anything. _"What is wrong with me?" _Noyem finally replied shakily. "I-If y-you don't want to be involved in this, don't worry. I'll just leave and move on."

"I want to meet Mercy," Jay hesitated , "…my mother. At least see her once. And I want to find out more about Solon. He could have been lying to me that he 'rescued' me'." "Wait Solon again?" asked Noyem. Jay nodded and Noyem had to turn her head away. She still didn't feel comfortable looking at him. "I talked about him last night, he raised me, raised me to be a tool," Jay said. His eyes were like stone, as if he was trying to not give any feelings or bad memories away.

"But Solon couldn't have done anything you say he did," began Noyem. She twiddled with her fingers. "Because…remember when I told you that you were left alone since Mercy had to address a guest? When you were just a baby? Well, Solon was that guest." "What? Why was he there? What did he want?" Jay got off the floor and stood next to Noyem, his eyes wide with anticipation. Noyem became even more uncomfortable as she stuttered with her words. "H-h-he just works there. He had gone off to visit his family then came back. That's all I know."

Jay sighed and slumped down on the floor. Pippo, Poppo, and Quppo walked over to him and reassuringly placed their paws on his shoulders. "Maybe it's just another 'Solon,'" offered Pippo. "Yeah, although that doesn't sound like a very common name…Kind of a screwy name if you ask me," added Quppo nervously. Noyem smiled sympathetically at the cute little scene. She brushed off her dress and walked over to the group. "Well, if you don't have any more questions maybe we should talk to the others. We need to come up with a time when you want to go Gadoria." The otters gasped at Noyem's words and formed a circle around Jay, as if wanting to keep Noyem from touching him. "No way are you going to take Jay away!" shouted Pippo. Quppo nodded. "Yeah! Jay belongs here with us!" "We may be fuzzy and cute, but sometimes fuzzy and cute can kill!" shouted Poppo. His two brothers looked at him with their eyebrows raised. "I mean…We don't want Jay to leave!" Quppo and Pippo got back into it. "YEAH!"

Noyem giggled. "Don't worry! If you three want to go with us you can come too." "I'm sure the ships in Port-On-Rage allow animals on board," agreed Jay as he moved the otters out of their circle positions. The otters scratched their back sheepishly and smiled. "Sorry, it's just…we kind of raised Jay so he's like our..um…" Quppo trailed off trying to think of a way to finish his sentence. "Son?" suggested Pippo. Jay chuckled then grinned. "Sure, I'm the son and you three are the parents."

_"He's kinda cute when he smiles like that," _the random thought crossed Noyem's mind when she saw Jay smiling at the otter brothers. She shut her eyes and tried to banish the thought from her mind. _"NO! No thoughts like that. Those bad thoughts. Bad thoughts. Think of holy stuff. Cross, holy water, Mother Mary, God, man bras, Jesus, the Beetles, Saint Andrew, making out, the pope, The Simpsons, crucifix, Allah, Buddy ( I mean Buddha), doves, church, and…Jay actually has really hard toned muscles..AH!" _Noyem's eyes went wide from fright when the next thought carefully formed into her mind. The thought caused her to shiver with fear, her to stomach churn, her mouth gape open, her heart pound. _"OhAllofMyHolyCrap…..have I fallen in love with them?" _

If Noyem had eaten seafood or Harriet's cooking, she would have puked with disgust.

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SORRY! People who review! I am sorry. I won't return for a few days. Along with a killer's case of writer's block my GRANDPARENT"S are coming over. (quivers with fear). This weekend is going to suck. I can already imagine it…

Granny: What are you doing, Emily?

Me: I'm Emma, granny. Mom's downstairs if you want her. Anyways, I'm writing.

Granny: What? Writing how? What is this? (hits computer with walking stick)

Me: It's a computer.

Granny: DEVIL'S MACHINERY! If you want to write get a feather!

Me: Feather..?

Granny: DEVIL'S MACHINERY! (keeps whacking computer with crane) DEVIL'S MACHINERY! DEVIL'S MACHINERY!

Me: Granny! STOP!

Ugh…Old people should stay in Old Folk's home. So people who are PAID to deal with them WILL deal with them.

Jay: Ha ha, only on chapter 5 and you're taking a break.

Me: NO I AM NOT! Grandparents are coming! I can't stop that!

Jay: (sighs) I pity the fool who sucks.

Me: Where's Michael Jackson? I want him as Jay again…

Thanks for your reviews, Summer something! But your name depresses me...sniff..sniff...reminds me of the dearly beloved summer I miss so much.


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own Tales of Legendia. I have said this five times already. Do you know what it is doing to my self-confidence? WAHHH! I would hand myself! If it wasn't for TV and Mc. Donalds and my inability to tie a knot. Anyways, I AM BACK! THE OLDIES ARE GONE! And my computer has only taken a little bit of damage from my granny's came. (Gaping hole in computer blows a fuse) Wow, I hope that wasn't important…ANYWAYS! Sorry it has been awhile, I had to go to some place where people prodded me with rulers and overly sharpened pencils and the lunches smelled like rat pee. Oh yeah..that's called school, forgot in all the time I spent drooling on my desk. ANYWAYS, I have to spend 7 consecutive hellish hours listening to teachers ramble and do WORK. Let me tell you this. WORK is not in my vocabulary. I think of it as PORK with a W, other than that I have no idea what it is. ANYWAYS, I got reviews from people. And it's not like the reviews I get in school: Daydreamed in class AGAIN or Tried to kill another student with a pen AGAIN or Drew eyes over eyelids to pretend she's listening AGAIN or Interrupted class to ramble needlessly about Dragon Quest, FOR THE FITH HUNDRED TIME. Whoa, you guys make the councilor at school look like a mean bastard. You guys are so nice! And to whoever gave me chocolate fudge cake, THANK YOU. Me addicted to ChOcOlAtE. And thank you too Celechan and whoever Samurai something is (sorry I mess up names). And whoever bunny person thingy is, I will try to add your suggestion at some point. Sorry but it might just be a bonus thingy, I'll have to pork things out. ANYWAYS, SORRY for taking so long but here is chapter 6. FINALLY. Oh, for extra note: WRITING THROUGH JAY'S POINT OF VIEW IS HARD. VERY HARD (for me, for another smartass I guess it's easy but being smart and only half an ass that makes it harder) . So that is why this chapter may suck…will suck.

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Jay could name any object, thing, or place on the Legacy. Ask him about the monsters found on the Legacy and he will give you a full page description. Ask him about the physical features of the Legacy and he will describe it down to the very last pebble. Ask Jay about any person on the Legacy and he will tell you ALL about their private life, fears, and thoughts and whenever that person is classified as an idiot or only slightly an idiot. But, when it came to understanding girls Jay only knew two things. 1) They have periods (learned from the Scallops and the Octopi) and 2.) They are all too moody and violent (slapping Shirley and overly emotional unstable Chloe).

Jay tapped his foot irritably. Noyem had dashed upstairs saying she needed to take care of 'personal business.' Whatever that 'personal business' was it was taking her forever. _"We should have left for Weritis Beacon twenty minutes ago. What the hell is she doing?" _Jay finally couldn't take it any longer, he marched up the stairs and threw open his bedroom door. "Noyem, what-" But Jay stopped. His whole entire floor was covered with mountains of clothing. His shirts, shorts, PJ's, socks, underwear filled every possible inch of floor space. A small otter paw could be seen reaching out of one pile. "Jay…help…me!" cried Pippo. The tail of another otter could be sticking out next to him. The nose of a smaller otter was twitching next to the tail. "Jay, I can't feel my toes," whimpered Poppo. "Mff umff efff!" could be heard under the pile, it was Quppo who was buried head first in the clothes. "What happened here?" Jay asked as he began pulling Pippo out of his clothing induced burial.

"They're helping me find something to wear," explained Noyem. She was kneeling in front of Jay's drawers pulling out articles of clothing. "I'm trying to find a bra but I can't seem to find one…I saw one in here earlier." Jay had pulled Pippo and Poppo out and was working on freeing Quppo. He stopped and looked at Noyem with his I-pity-your-stupidity look. "Noyem, I don't own a bra."

"FOUND ONE!" Noyem happily took what she found out. "If this isn't a bra then what is it?"

"..That's a pair of boxers."

Noyem stuck her tongue out. "No, this a bra! It's.." Noyem inspected the boxers carefully. She had been holding it upside down. "OH SHIT!" Noyem threw the boxers at Jay and wiped her hands against her sides. "GROSS, GROSS, GROSS! Where are your man bras when I need them?"

The underwear hit the side of Jay's head and hung off his ponytail like some weird clothesline. He picked it off and threw it on the ground. He thrust Quppo out of his prison of clothes then walked up to Noyem. "Why do you need a new bra?" "I want a new dress and since the one I'm wearing has a built in bra in it that means that if I take it off, 'poofy' boobs hanging everywhere!" _"Poofy?" _Jay blinked several times before he was able to fully understand what she saying. "What's wrong with what you're wearing now?" Jay inspected Noyem's outfit. She wore a thin white dress that clung to her figure with a blue jacket that hung to the dress by the fine leather belt around her waist. The back of the dress and jacket had been cut into a V shape that showed off most of Noyem's bare back. But the front of the dress caught Jay's attention the most. The faded line of ripped stitching could be seen in a strange vine like pattern. _"She must have torn something off her dress."_

"What do you think you're staring at, MJ jr.? I'm not a peep show you know," Noyem folded her arms across her chest while a warm blush crept up her cheeks. "Sorry, didn't mean to," apologized Jay immediately. Noyem threw back a curl of light copper hair and nervously looked down at the floor. "Um," she murmured, "Jay this might be a really stupid question but can I ask it anyway?"

_"There she goes again, random mood swing." _"Sure go ahead." Jay began putting his clothes back into his drawers while Noyem folded her hands on her lap. "Um...are…well...it's stupid..um, are you...going..uh.." Noyem shook her head, her face a bright crimson red. "N-never mind."

_"She must be on her period. Why else would she be acting this stupid?" _"Well, if you're not going to ask anything help me put up all of this up," Jay motioned to the heap of clothes the otters had been buried in. "Nah, I don't want to risk touching your undies again," Noyem suddenly snapped out of her weird mood. She stood up and walked out of the room while shouting over her shoulder. "Don't take too long putting stuff up, remember we got to go to Weritis Beacon."

Jay stared after Noyem with mouth hanging open. Then he stared at the mess that he would have to clean up, alone. "HEY! You caused this mess you should-"

"We'll make a new outfit for you, Yammy," said Pippo as he followed her out of the room. "Yeah! We make all of our own clothes! Except Jay's, I don't even think we could create an outfit that weird. No offense Jay," Quppo closed the door as the chattering bunch left Jay in the mountain range of Britney Spears backstage clothes and Jay's boxers and briefs (along with a few man bras Noyem overlooked). It would at best estimate take a really, really,_ really _long time for Jay to pick up everything and stuff it in the drawers. "Oh, and Jay," Noyem opened the door and peeked in. "While you're at it can you straighten my pallet up too? You can't see it because it's hidden under that pile of creepy purple short shorts. Or maybe that's the man bras I was looking for..Whatever, can you just do that little favor for me? Thanks!" Noyem closed the door just in time to avoid a pair of socks Jay aimed at her head.

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INTERMISSION: Sorry the beginning is crappish, Wrote super fast. Anyways I have to hang out with my parents for awhile. My grandfather (not the one who visited me my other one) passed on so I got to go to his funeral. Humor isn't going to be my main strong point for awhile, funerals make me depressed (even though I didn't know my grandfather very well) I'll try to do better in the next chapter and the rest of this one. UGH, forgot that I had a history quiz tomorrow too…hm…who was the first president again? I'll just start at Bush and go down. Bush, Lincoln, Barney, Man Eating Rabbit from Monty Python, Barney again…

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The soft trickling of the stream set a peaceful aura over the serene setting of Will's yard. Noyem hung her feet in the water, her boots lying beside her as she splashed and slapped the water. She leaned casually back, her posture slumped as she talked animatedly with Norma. Norma was stretched out beside Noyem, her legs tucked to her side as she ran a hand through the passing water.

Jay preferred sitting away from the sun's biting rays. He sat with his back against the large single tree in Will's yard. Jay's forehead was creased as he delved into his portentous thoughts. _"This all can't be happening at random. Something or someone must be at work here. How else could Noyem be here? It can't just be coincidence. It could have something to do with the 'monster' she was attacked by, someone could be controlling it or maybe it wasn't even a monster... If only that ditz could provide preferable information! And then seeing my 'mother,' I don't even know how to organize my thoughts when thinking about that…" _Jay's mind continued to ramble through his thoughts until one voice broke his concentration.

"So, JJ, I heard that you and Yammy stayed up ALL night long yesterday," Norma turned her attention to Jay, a seemingly curious smile spread over her face. Noyem didn't face Jay, but her shoulders were shaking from the laughter she was trying to conceal. "So, was it romantic?" Norma flashed her eyelashes melodramatically as she waited for Jay to reply.

Jay heaved a sigh as he remembered the night before where he had spent his whole night picking rotting shrimp and scallops out of Noyem's cot. "I thought something smelled bad in here," Jay had muttered as he saw the damp sheets covered with seafood. "I think you mean 'fishy' something smells 'fishy' in here," Noyem had added. "Get it? Cause of the fish-" "Shut up and help me." _"I think I would rather have Moses as a roommate then Noyem. And that's saying A LOT." _

"Sure, if washing damp sheets is romantic," said Jay. _"Wait that didn't come out sounding good…"_

"Whoa, first making out in front of EVERYONE now moving on to THAT? And I used to think you were a good guy, JJ!"

"It's not like that!" insisted Jay. "Don't listen to a word Noyem says!" Noyem put a hand over her heart and fell back into the grass so Jay and anyone else watching could see her. She sighed passionately. "Oh, I think I will never forget that night!"

"I think I'll never forget that smell," Jay mumbled. The padding of someone walking across the grass could be heard. Jay, Norma, and Noyem looked up as Will cleared his throat. "You, _children, _should not be discussing such _inappropriate _matters." "Aw, Teach! Cut us some slack! Look up 'teenager' in that dictionary brain of yours and you'll see the words 'Uncontrollable Bundle of Raging Never be Settled until Second Base Hormones,'" Norma smiled brightly then broke off into laughter with Noyem.

"Norma, you're the only one who can't be controlled," cut Chloe. She dropped her hands to her side and gave The Uncontrollable Bunch of Raging Never be Settled until Second Base teens a very adult like look. Senel stood beside her, an adult like look shadowing his face also. Noyem smiled mischievously. " Move your hand to the right a bit more and you'll reach the grand prize, Ms. Chloe." Chloe looked taken back. "What are you-" Chloe looked down at her hand. It was moving (with its own will? Guess) towards Senel's ass. As his usual oblivious to any girl's feelings for him personality, Senel hadn't noticed. Chloe (sadly) dropped her hand back to her side.

_"I'm glad I'm not that DUMB. Senel wouldn't realize that a girl liked him if she shouted it in his face. And that's apparent because Shirley…What type of idiot is dumber than him?" _Jay's question was soon answered.

"I'm here!" declared Moses loudly as he sauntered into the lawn in his typical fashion. "Now, we just have to wait for Shirley and we'll be able to talk this predicament out. How long did she say she would take, Senel?" Will turned to Senel for the reply. "About a half hour, she's running a favor for Maurtis," answered Senel. "What we here for anyway?" asked Moses as he flopped down next to Jay. "To discuss plans for going to Gadoria. It' going to be hard for each of us," said Senel. "Teach isn't allowed on the mainland, C probably isn't real welcome there anymore since Shirl's accident, and Red, you're a bandit everyone wants to kill you," Norma shrugged her shoulders. "So it will probably be tricky getting in."

"What do you mean by everyone wants to kill me?"

"Whoa, whoa! I think you guys are forgetting a very important factor here: Me. You bunch don't have to go anywhere, I can take Jay to Gadoria by myself. I don't need the little escort crew," Noyem stood up and walked over to Jay. She pulled him up. "All I have to do is show Jay's little overly pale face to Mercy then 'poofy' I'm free as a pretty bird can be. Jay can leave two seconds after stepping onto Gadoria so don't worry about him," Noyem clapped a hand on Jay's shoulder, her nails slightly digging into his skin. "Your freak here is in my perfectly capable hands."

_"Did she use the word 'poofy' again? And capable hands? I feel like if she grips me any harder I'll bleed in her perfectly capable hands." _"Jay is our friend, we are not going to let him go alone with just you," said Senel, being slightly offensive. "What do you mean 'just me?'" Noyem shoved Jay back onto the ground and stood in front of Senel with her hands on her hips. "Well, considering that you haven't given us much information about yourself you are on our suspicious people list."

"You're not very nice for a guy who's tall, dark, and hot," Noyem scanned her eyes over Senel. Senel stepped back, even he felt uncomfortable being stared at the way Noyem was scanning over him. She looked like a customer looking at a car and trying to decide whenever it sucked or not. "You're not even that tall, dark, and hot either. What's with the albino afro?"

Before Senel could muse out a reply, a young blonde girl ran up to the gate. Her face was red from running and some strands of hair stuck to the sweat on her forehead. "I'm sorry I'm late. I came here as fast as I could," Shirley smiled slightly. When she noticed Jay she gasped. "Oh no! Jay are you alright? You have to go live in Gadoria don't you? You can't leave! You belong here, you-"

"Shirley, calm down. We haven't decided anything yet…but Jay something does seem to be wrong with you. Are you feeling ill?" Chloe's voice held a level of concern. Something definitely was wrong with Jay. Seriously wrong. Since writing it would make me throw up in various ways I'll just give you some clues so you can figure it out yourself. And when you do figure it out, please, to all you believe in that is holy, don't tell me. I already know what it is and to those of you who like stating the obvious just, keep quite.

A) Remember, Jay likes Shirley in that cute innocent way that sucks, unrequited love.

B) Shirley is sweaty from running.

C) Jay is a boy. To those of you just realizing this statement it's OK. I understand that it can be difficult to tell the sexes of MJ look-alikes.

D)Ehhh, I mentioned that Jay IS a BOY. I'm sure all of you who know of the secrets of the Scallops and the Octopi know what boy's..um..have and what that thing can…I can't write this.

E) Ewww, just writing those statements DID make me throw up a little…

_"Curse you, idiotic narrator," _thought Jay as he tried to **calm **himself down.

"With everyone here now we can finally discuss the pressing mattter at hand," said Will. He led the group out of the sunshiny yard and opened the door to let the party sprawl around his living room. Finally the all important meeting could be held.

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AFTERWORD: So sorry I had to end so quickly..after writing about Jay's…ewWWWWWWWWWWWWWwww…..I just couldn't go on. Sorry, I was, crude so to speak..or just pain gross and squeamish about…..Oh I can't take it any longer…BLEHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Pukes out MSG) OH! Chinese food! But I ate this four days ago…

Jay: I will kill you.

Me: Hi, want some Chinese Chow?

Jay: Painfully kill you for what you have done.

Me: What did I do?

Jay: WHAT DID YOU DO? Just read this? What were you thinking?

Me: Poofyness.

Jay: Like I said, kill you painfully and slowly…

That's all I got for now! And remember, MSG is even tastier when puked! I'll try to update really fast later! If I'm not too busy dying.SOrry for any mistakes couldn't proofread, cleaning up puke.


	7. Chapter 7

I do not own Tales of Legendia, or a cat, or a LAPTOP, or a life. Wait, exit that last one. I am currently renting a life so that is only half true. ANYWAYS, school and homework is HARD. Have I already said that I hate school? Well guess what, I really, really, really, hate school. If someone hadn't already I would have summoned a demon then sic it on the school. But someone already did many years ago, but instead of being called demons they are better know as MATH TEACHERS. ANYWAYS, sorry about crude humor in the last chapter…I mean suckish humor. ANYWAYS, I'll try to make this one better. TRY. ANYWAYS, it is good to be back in my swirly computer chair, it is so much better than the hug of a wrinkly old person. I think the ring of deaths in my family has stopped (for the time being. It will start again probably if _Big Brother _is cancelled, my mom, dad, and grandmother live off that show like someone might with life support.) ANYWAYS, thanks to you people who review! Especially you, Rabbit Something, your reviews are very helpful. Wow, people actually read what I write. I feel slightly important. It's almost like school but there I'm noticed for having a hamster living in my hair or drooling uncontrollably because I sit behind that really tan hot guy. Sigh, tan hot guy whose name I forgot, sigh….wait a minute..what was I just talking about? Oh, yeah. Tan hot guy….(drools). Wait a minute what was I talking about again? Oh yeah, fanfic. Almost forgot. ANYWAYS, here is chapter seven! Sorry it takes me so long to update it's because SCHOOL takes 9 to 10 hours of my life away a day (school and homework added). And guess what? This chapter will probably suck as much as the last one! No, MORE because I actually try to act serious in writing it but I got bored so I kinda…blahed stuff. (Cries) It's all school's fault!

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Noyem sighed. Usually Noyem wasn't one to sigh, she didn't like feeling like some overly depressed person. But there was reason to sigh. Once again Noyem found herself standing in front of Mr. Shirtless, Albino Afro dude, Blondie, ADD girl, The Oldie, Emeril wannabe, The Ass Grabbing Wonder, and the Man Bra wearing Casper MJ look-alike who stole some clothes from Britney Spears' backup dancers or some screwy Target magazine. And once again she would have to tell this assortment of strange people her life story. Or as much as she could lie about her life story.

Jay, Moses, and Will were on the couch farthest from the door. Moses in the middle with Will closest to where Noyem stood, which was almost in the small walk in kitchen. Shirley, Harriet, Senel, Norma, and Chloe were squeezed onto the other couch. Harriet, being so little, was able to fit between Senel and Norma. Shirley was sitting opposite of Will with Chloe opposite of Jay. Everyone had their eyes focused on her…everyone other than Jay. His pasty pale skin had turned into ruby blush. He was still embarrassed about his 'accident' in the yard. No one but Noyem had seen what had really been wrong with Jay. _"Can't spell erection with a J, Jay." _Noyem had wanted to say that aloud to him in the yard, but she still couldn't look Jay in the eye without stammering. Noyem even felt self conscious just thinking about him, her heart would sk- Well, everyone knows about how cheesy love can be. And just the word love made Noyem feel uncomfortable. But to be in love with Jay made her want to rip her heart out and beat the hell out of it.

_"STUPID HEART! BAD HEART! VERY BAD! Look what you did!" Noyem kicked her heart while it was still cowering down on the floor. It had a black eye and was bleeding from the lip. "It's not my fault I swear! I didn't make you fall in love with Freaky Mc. Short Freak!" "Then who did?" demanded Noyem. "Um, hormones? No, brain did! Go beat brain up!" "Brain has nothing to do with this! You're always skipping like crazy whenever I look at the creep! What is so attractive about him? His hair style sucks, his clothes sucks, his face sucks, his voice…is kind of nice along with-" started Noyem. She gazed off dreamily. "Um, Noyem? Noyem?" _

"Noyem? Hello? Are you still with us?" Harriet was tugging on her dress sleeve. Noyem flinched from the young girl's touch, she hadn't even noticed that Harriet had gotten up. "Yeah, I'm Ok. Just having a really wacky day dream…" Noyem rubbed her eyes while Harriet hopped back on the couch. "What were we talking about?" Noyem looked around the room, hoping for someone to start a string of questions that she could answer with a simple white lie.

"Why don't you tell everyone who Wyllon is," Jay said it as a statement, not a question. His embarrassment seemed to have faded. _"Can't really think of a short simple lie for that.." _Noyem looked thoughtfully around the room. Could she really trust these people? From past experience her motto had always been: **Everyone sucks but me! Don't trust losers. **She wondered if she should change that motto. _"Naw, motto rocks. But I guess it wouldn't hurt me if I spit a little bit of truth out." _

"Wyllon is the captain of my family's guard. He really just hangs around Rosal, my mother dearest, and says he has to have her under 'full guard,'" Noyem strained the word 'dearest' so strangely it almost sounded like 'bitchest.' "He's not real powerful for a captain though, he carries a sword but it's probably baby proofed so he won't hurt himself. He really acts more like a delivery boy then a guard."

"How does JJ know who this W-guy is?" Norma was completely lost on the conversation. And freaked out that she hadn't found a nickname in her scattered mind for the bizarre name Wyllon. "He came to the Oresoren village earlier and tried to take Noyem. I can guess on why he came but I'll let Noyem explain," Jay turned to Noyem. Noyem had to advert her eyes from his gaze and stare at the table. "He came to tell me that..my time was up. I have to go home and be a good girl again. No more wandering around for me. Much to the disappointment to the poor cuties who haven't met me yet," Noyem flipped her hair back and smiled a classy I-could-have-your-boyfriend-for-ten-minutes-and-make-him-forget-all-about-you smile.

"So that's why you were crying and screaming so loudly? Because you have to go home?" Jay looked at her cynically. Noyem's face fell from her cheerful expression into one of defeat. _"This guy won't take a simple answer will he?"_ "Fine, since you need to know every aspect of my freaking life I'll tell you. In three days my execution is going to go ahead. And probably, thanks to my great mother, I'll probably skip the sword and axe and hang off a comfortable, nice, neck breaking, slow death rope." The room went quiet, no one knew what to say in reply to such an outburst.

"Whaddya mean by skip the 'sword and axe?'" asked Moses, breaking the silence. Will pushed his glasses farther up his nose and cleared his throat, ready to sound all intelligent. "I'm presuming that since Noyem is of a high ranking family that a regular execution would be one of beheading. Sword beheading is for the royal or noble family while axe is preserved for the less ranking nobles. Being hanged is a punishment persevered for the common folk." Will cleared his throat again this time it sounded like a parental 'a-hem' . "Harriet, I believe that the Madam Mussett wanted to see you today. She says she has a task for you." Harriet stuck her lip out. "You're just making that up so I'll leave and won't hear the rest of the conversation!" "Exactly, you're such a smart girl! Now leave," Will pointed to the door. Harriet stood up huffily and placed her hands on her hips. "No." "Harriet, I forgot to tell you," said Senel. "Isabella wanted to see you for her hangover problem, apparently she couldn't get up so she couldn't make breakfast for herself. So, why don't you go to her house and make some lunch for her?"

Harriet's eye grew bigger. Someone had actually _requested_ her food. "Really? OK!" Harriet ran out the door while shouting behind her. "If it's a lie I'm going to make you eat my super secret mystery meat, Senel!" She slammed the door behind, leaving the teens and single adult alone. "Good cover up, Coolidge," complemented Chloe once Harriet was out of hearing. "It's not a lie, Isabella is seriously having a major hangover. Apparently last night she drunk a whole keg."

Will sighed, relieved. "Let us get back to the matter at hand. As I was saying, along with the low ranking of being hung it is also the most…painful. While the sword and axe give a quick death hanging takes longer." Norma squirmed in her seat, unnerved by the topic at hand. "But, Teach, isn't death the same thing no matter what the punishment? I mean it's still death, doesn't it suck either way?"

Noyem was leaning against the wall (the one where she and Jay had had their little moment… or more like Noyem held Jay down while she smacked her lips on his, almost violently. Sorry, random added thing back to the story). She straightened her posture and walked over to where Norma sat. She went behind the couch and leaned against the headrest Norma was using. She placed her hands around Norma's skinny neck.

"Death the same thing? You don't know much, huh?" Noyem's voice took on a note of foreign seriousness. Noyem playfully moved Norma's head side to side then tightened her grip around her throat. The rest of the group watched the scene cautiously, a mundane curiosity on their faces. Only Jay was as unreadable as ever. Norma made a loud audible gulp.

"First, the priest reads a long list of all of your crimes. It can last for hours, and you just stand there with the noose around your neck. You can think about escaping, but the threatening executioner to your side makes escape impossible. Finally, the priest either tells you to go to hell or let the Gods judge you justly. Finally you're dropped."

Noyem moved her hands up Norma's throat.

"If you haven't died from the force of which you are dropped, you're left to hang until you suffocate. You can't breathe, you can't think, all you can do is wail your limbs helplessly. You can see everything around you, everyone who has come to see your death. Everyone who wants to see your death. You start going lightheaded, still trying to gulp for air. You neck may be starting to break, the sickening sound of the bone slowly snapping is the last thing you hear. And finally, after your last breath you start seeing black and then …POOFY! You're super dead," Noyem let go of Norma's neck and drew an imaginary blade across her own throat. Norma took in a gasp of air and felt her neck. There wasn't a single mark, the skin wasn't even red. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, even Jay and Will had been on their edges of their seats at the last sentence of Noyem's monologue. Norma turned around in her seats and faced Noyem. "Geez, Yammy! Don't scare me like that!" "Sorry, I was doing it for the drama. It is called 'suspense,'" explained Noyem melodramatically. _"HA! With the little gang all rallied up by my little speech they probably forgot all about my execu-" _

"So why are you to be executed, Noyem? Does it have to do with Jay?" Shirley interrupted Noyem's thoughts and spoke in her soft angel sweet voice that to other girls sounded horribly annoying and caused some to hate Shirley immediately. _"SHIT!" _"Why do you want to know?" Noyem strolled back to her position in the front of the room trying to act calm while on the inside...

"_"STUPID BRAIN! Think of a lie and fast!" Noyem hovered over the tiny purple figure crouched over with a pencil in hand scrabbling words down so fast all you could see was a blur. "I'm thinking, I'm thinking! Um, what excuse haven't we used before?" "What about, my father was a poor sea merchant so he sold me to the circus and to escape I high-jacked a runaway elephant while furiously making out with a cute trapeze artist?" "Sorry, you actually told them the truth about your parents and I think it's impossible to make out while high-jacking an elephant…" "DAMMIT BRAIN! Warn me before I say stuff OK?" _

"Noyem, Noyem?" Senel waved a hand in front of Noyem's face. Noyem yelped and stepped back. "Sorry I spaced, another wacky daydream. What were you saying?" "Shirley asked you why you're going to be executed," informed Chloe solemnly. Noyem looked over the group of people again. They were strangers to her, she had met them only yesterday. Yet again, she had done more with guys she had just met in thirty minutes..but..(ahem)..other story. Noyem's eyes swept over their faces, they were different from other people she had meant before. But did that mean that she could trust them?

"I only had six months to find Mercy's son. I'm on month eight. And along my journey I have made some bad choices and gained wisdom from my dumb mistakes." _"Yeah, the wisdom of don't stab a person in the ribs. It gets stuck in the bone so you have to stab downwards then aim it between the ribs. Also the wisdom of just because a guy's cute doesn't mean he's a good kisser." _Noyem shivered at a bad memory from that last thought and continued on. "And I have met very many Jay-wannabes. Some so hot you could fry an egg on them and some so ugly you would want to stab your eyes out just to get rid of the image. Unfortunately, my bad habits have landed me in trouble with Rosal's good book so she has sent some of her dogs at me. " "So do you think someone like Wyllon will come again to try and take you back?" Jay asked, his voice surprisingly soft. Noyem wasn't expecting Jay to sound so worried. "Um, well there is Whitehill and Jare. Those two might come after me. Whitehill is a big hairless gorilla and Jare is…the only words I can think of describing him are 'ASS-HOLE.'"

"Do you think they followed you here too?" asked Shirley. Noyem couldn't help but stare at the beautiful blonde girl with envy. Noyem was pretty but she didn't have that pure soul look that Shirley had. Shirley seemed to hold an inner strength, something that Noyem could sense but couldn't understand. Noyem had seen and experience many different things but she would always push them back and lock them into her mind. Shirley almost had a look of acceptance, a calm with her past. "I guess so, Wyllon is their captain and if he's here he might have taken them as bodyguards," said Noyem examining Shirley closely. _"This girl's not so hot…my breast are bigger than hers! Like probably a couple hundred cup sizes! So why does that freak Jay like her?" _

"Do you have any plan to get rid of them? Any plan to stop your execution? Any plan of what to do once we arrive in Gadoria? Any plan of what we can do to help?" Senel threw Noyem the flurry of questions. Noyem stared at him blankly and replied simply: "Ummmmm, no." "Do you even know what you're going to do once you show Jay to Mercy? What is Jay is the wrong person?" Will stared at Noyem intently waiting for a complicated reply. "Jay is Mercy's son. No doubt about that. Once she sees him I'll be able to live as I please and you can do whatever you want," said Noyem, folding her hands across her chest confidently. "I just know things will work out cause…well, I'm not dead yet so that gives me half the chance of getting everything right. And anyway, you guys have no reason to help me! I'm just a stranger to you, why are you all trying so hard? I can handle the whole affair on my own! In fact if you people are so serious all the time I'll just leave and none of you-"

Will got up and bonked her on the head before she could continue. "Stop talking like that." "If you are in danger we will help you, no matter what you say," said Senel sternly. "Yeah you're one of us, Yammy! Teach bonking you initiates you into our group!" "And if you're gonna deal with Jay then you're dealin with us!" said Moses. "Jay's my short, pale, weird, freaky, sex confused, little brother!" Moses put his arm around Jay's shoulder affectionately and smiled. Jay smiled back then reached for his dagger. "Don't touch me, Moses, or I'll kill you."

"See? We're all family here!" exclaimed Moses happily as Jay tried to pry Moses' arm off him by using the blade of his dagger like a wrench. "We're all going to Gadoria with Jay. Last night he told us he has to go and said: 'I'll go alone' then we beat some sense into him and told him we're coming along too, no matter what," affirmed Chloe to Noyem. "But that doesn't mean we trust you, Jay's only doing it because he wants to know…about his mother," she added. "Aw, don't listen to C. She'll just make you depressed. We'll have fun in Gadoria! Now, we just need to find out when to leave," Norma got off the couch and stood in front of the group next to Noyem. "The only times a ship is leaving for Gadoria is tomorrow at 6pm and at 2pm three days from now. Which one should we take?" informed Jay as he still struggled to get Moses' arm off him.

"I say we should try to make it for the one tomorrow and create a plan before we leave. If not we'll have to take the next one. Do you agree, Noyem?" Will turned to Noyem who hadn't said a thing since Will had bonked her. Noyem gave everyone a wide grin. "Whatever is fine with you guys is fine with me." The rest of the group agreed to the plan and began talking excitedly. Noyem joined in and smiled alongside them but a horrible dread ate away at her. _"They are walking right into their own deaths…"_

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AFTERWORD: Huff, huff, huff, writing is so HARD. How do people do it? I am sorry this sucks so much, it's hard to write cuz I haven't played TOL in weeks. OH TOL! How I miss you but SCHOOL gets in the way. So slowly I am forgetting everything I remember from TOL…Now if I was writing a Dragon Quest FF that would be different….sigh…How could anyone ever forget the wonderfulness of Dragon Quest?

Jay: HA HA!

Me: What's so funny?

Jay: If Dragon Quest is so great why doesn't it have a fanfic site, HUH? Admit it, both you and Dragon Quest suck.

Me: What. Did. You. Say?

Jay: DRAGON QUEST SUCKS.

Me:………………………..Jay, turn around and close your eyes.

Jay: Why?

Me; Do it.

Jay (turns around): What are you going to do?

Me: Nothing (takes out overly large and comical looking machine gun) NoThinG bUt KiLL yOU! (Shoots mercilessly at Jay) MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhA (Jay falls over, bleeding, I throw the overly large and overly comical looking machine gun at his dead body) Don't mess with Dragon Quest, loser. (I walk away calmly.)

Ah…killing Jay makes me feel better. Now I really want to go play Dragon Quest…but I have to study for a science test. (mumbles) Stupid science, all complicated and sciencey. Who actually uses science?..other than scientists? Never mind, if you actually read this crappy chapter thank you…I'll try SUPER SUPER SUPER hard to do better on the next one. Until then I must understand why it hurts to touch fire (pokes finger in fire) OW (pokes finger in fire) OW (pokes finger in fire) OW (pokes finger in fire) OW! Why do I suffer? (pokes finger in fire) OW!

Sorry for the dumbness in this chapter! If I don't make the next one better I'll feed what's left of my soul to my hamsters. Till next time! Bye!


	8. Chapter 8

I do not own TOL. I could kidnap the producers than force them to sell me the game rights, but naw. That would take time away from playing Dragon Quest, and I'm just too damn lazy. Ah, Dragon Quest, your splendor has dug deep into my mind and given me an addiction that even crack addicts would cry to. But alas, I know I am not the only Dragon Quest lover. Of course I'm probably the only Dragon Quest lover who would sell her grandmother to get my little pale hands on Dragon Quest 9 (well, I don't like my grandmother so much so I would probably sell her just to get a pack of gum). But my heart has forsaken me, there is no Dragon Quest 9. YET. Maybe it's still being produced and drawn and story boarded! But knowing my luck (which sucks ass) there probably won't. WHY! WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY! (Ahem) Excuse my behavior, I forgot I was within TOL standards (cough Dragon cough Quest cough is cough better cough WAIT cough I cough mean cough TOL cough can cough be cough cool cough too cough…sometimes cough). Sigh, I realize that my last chapters have SUCKED SERIOUS ASS. But I thank those who actually bother reading this. I didn't know there were such kind people in the world! (I come from a place that would make hell seem like a vacation spot. Anyone else who goes to CMSE would agree with me) And thanks Bishieluver, although I am allergic to peanuts so that chocolate you gave me better not have peanuts in it! ANYWAY here is chapter eight that is once again another chapter that waste time. But next chapter…muhahahahahaha…will be named KISSING BOOTH! Hehehehe, but you will have to wait to find out what it's truly about. ANYWAYS, chapter 8 (sniff, sniff, just like DRAGON QUEST EIGHT! I want to play the game again now..) Sorry this chapter took so long, AGAIN. After school I am just like: BLAH! I don't remember if I wrote this before but I HATE SCHOOL! Also I got sick and the medicine I had to take knocked me out and I slept for like two days straight. Next makeup work, yippe ki crap. Oh, and for note the beginning of this chapter caused me to throw up so much MSG I now have the legal limit to start my own Chinese Restaurant, thinking of calling it Em Chow. ANYWAYS, the beginning, (shiver), will kill you. Worse than the flashback beginning of chapter four, worse than ANYTHING you have ever read. You will DIE if you read this chapter. Seriously DIE! So go ahead and go for the little X in the corner to exit safely, but if you catch a glimpse of the lettering below the dotted line, DO NOT PANIC! Simply gorge your eyes out with your pencil, thumbnail, Pepsi can, or Michael Jackson or Brittany Spears CD then run. Run far, far away.

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Noyem looked out over the still waters of the Oresoren lake. A faint plop could be heard every few seconds made by a fish poking its mouth over its aquatic world then ducking back into the dark waters. Noyem breathed in the smell of the small fishing hole then breathed out deeply. There wasn't a single trace of the stench of fish food. The waters were calm and the lighting of the otters' cave was at a dim glow. There was no roar of distant conversation in the street over or the rustling of a crowd's feet. Everything was at perfect peace.

Noyem stood on the wooden planks of the tiny dock. Her eyes were glazed with distant concentration as she lost herself in her thoughts. Her mind kept replaying scenes over and over, trying to make sense of the situation she faced. She tried to find an answers somewhere hidden in her mind but only the horrible doubt surfaced. "You look like you're deep in thought," Noyem turned to see Jay standing behind her, a rare smile over his lips. Noyem hadn't noticed his presence until he had spoken. She flinched at his words then returned a small smile back. "Just thinking of tomorrow," answered Noyem softly. Jay moved to stand beside her, when he spoke he faced out towards the water. "I need to ask you something, Noyem. Something important." His purple eyes shifted to look at her. Noyem felt her heart pounding in her chest. "W-w-what is it, Jay?" Jay turned to Noyem and took her hands in his. Noyem was sure that Jay could hear her heart beating wildly. "Noyem, I.." but Jay stopped instead he leaned forward and kissed her. A delighted shiver ran up her back when she felt his lips press against his. Noyem pressed herself firmly against him. He pulled away from her and smiled as he placed his hands gently around Noyem's waist. "Noyem, I love you." He leaned forward again then…

Noyem woke up.

She sat straight up in her cot and screamed. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH!" she panted then continued. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" _"Was that a dream?" _AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" _"What the hell kind of dream was I having?" _"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" _"Why was Jay so much hotter and taller in my dream?"_ "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" _"And most important and disturbing, why did I enjoy that dream so much?" _**"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" **

Jay threw the covers off his head. "Wass a goin on?" His eyes were half closed and he held his dagger (he sleeps with his dagger, when he was younger he called it Hurtful Teddy) by the blade with the harmless smooth handle pointing at Noyem. His raven black hair was a mess on his head instead of the usual orderly ponytail and drool was hanging off one side of his mouth. Dark circles were under his already dark enough eyes and the dumbest expression Jay could possibly have was on his face. He didn't look half as attractive as his Casanova counterpart from Noyem's dream.

"I had the worst nightmare of my life," sighed Noyem exasperated. Jay blinked dumbly for a few seconds. "What?" "Well, it started off like all of my normal dreams, a world free of seafood. But then suddenly you appeared and ruined everything. It was so freaking scary." Noyem brought her covers to her head and trembled at the thought of the dream. "A dream with you in it is bad enough but then…I can't even say or else it would cause you to wet your cheap, catalog bought, purple shorts." Jay blinked dumbly again and dropped his dagger onto the bed spread. He reached for the seashell shaped clock by his bed. "Noyem, do you know what time it is?" "Um, midnight?" "THREE AM IN THE MORNING! GO BACK TO BED!" Jay slammed the clock back on his nightstand then collapsed onto his bed. "Fine then, nighty night," said Noyem. She snuggled under the covers then added in a singsong voice, "Don't let anything kill you or bite while sleeping through the night."

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Noyem breathed in the smell of the Oresoren cave. It stank of otters and seafood. _"I miss my dream now…" _"Do you remember which way he left, Woppo?" Jay knelt down beside a small Oresoren child. It wore nothing but a cute blue bib and a hat that was a miniature to Pippo's. The child shook his head side to side vigorously. "No, but that man sure was scary! I thought he was coming for information from you so that's why I let him in, but when I did he gave me this stuff that made me sleepy," Woppo mimicked the action of putting a rag over his face. "When I woke up my momma told me that he had already left. I got in real big trouble for falling asleep on guard duty!" Woppo scratched his ear with his front left paw and shifted his feet nervously on the dirt ground. "Am I in trouble with you too, Jay?" "It's not your fault, Woppo, I know that. You shouldn't have been the only one on guard duty that day. Really, you're too young for such a responsibility, but your father says you're mature enough to hold a place in guarding the village." Jay smiled and patted the otter on the head. "You can keep your position if you want to." Woppo jumped slightly and beamed. "Really? Thank you, Jay! Thank you!" The otter child broke into a chorus of cheerful 'ors.' An older matronly otter walked out of the guard house towards Woppo. She placed her weathered paws on his shoulders. "I'm sorry we couldn't help you, Jay. I wish I could remember where that man went but I was so worried about Woppo that I didn't pay any attention to him," Woppo's mother reached into her pink dress and pulled out a fried piece of fish. "I made some snacks if you two are hungry though." Jay politely refused the food and dragged Noyem away before she could retch from the sight of the seafood.

"Well, where can we check now, Jay?" asked Noyem while stifling a yawn. It was 10:00am and the two had been running throughout the village all morning asking otters if they had seen Wyllon. Since his random intrusion there had been no sign of the portly man. But that didn't stop Quppo from ordering his otter army to search the entire area around the village. "We must find him!" Quppo had announced to his squad of twenty mean talking, bitch slapping, group of adorable little war otters. "We must show him that when you mess with the whiskers, you get the teeth! And when you mess with the teeth, you get the rabies! And when you mess with the rabies, you have to deal with doctors! And when you mess with doctors, you have to pay…the doctors for the rabies shot. And they're expensive!" At the end of Quppo's awe-inspiring speech the otters roared in agreement (or just said 'ors' really loud). After the bloodthirsty little otters had been spilt into search groups and given the command to 'Beat the scallop out of Wyllon' if they found him, Jay and Noyem had been given the duty to question the residential otters. So far the two were getting nowhere.

"We haven't questioned the owner of the inn yet, although I doubt he saw anything. He was on the opposite side of the cavern when Wyllon arrived," said Jay, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. He nearly tripped over an Oresoren that darted past him. Noyem and Jay had walked into the teeming market street of the Oresoren Village. The fishing hole lied to their right while stands and small markets crowded the area to their left. It was like a smaller and fluffier version of downtown rush hour with furry bodies pushing to and fro through the congested street. Noyem and Jay had the upper hand in the traffic though, they could step over the busy otters.

"We have to leave at two for Port-On-Rage so we have all the time in the world to ask everyone about Ugly, Squat, and Stupid," said Noyem, referring to the name she had been calling Wyllon. Jay didn't rely and continued moving through the street. After jumping over otters carrying fishing poles, merchandise, nuclear weapons (WTF?), and anything else the otters were either selling or buying, Jay and Noyem reached the outside of the only inn in the Oresoren Village. The area was surprisingly quieter than the street before and only the creaking and thumping of the machines outside the village could be heard. Jay peered inside the inn. "Hello? Are you there, Nappo?" No reply came from within the small inn. Jay came back out and shrugged. Noyem yawned and didn't bother hiding it behind her hand. "Guess we'll have to go somewhere else then." Once again Jay ignored her. He walked away and exited through the doorway that led to the overhanging that hung above the machinery. _"What is wrong with him? Do boys have like, guy periods or something? Do they have to wear their man bras while on their guy period? Whatever. His moodiness is getting on my nerves." _Noyem couldn't help but secretly admit to herself that Jay looked kind of cute while pouting. But yet when she thought that she wanted to strangle herself. _"Don't fall in love with men who wear freaking purple shorts and live with hairy children. I might end up like Michael Jackson's wife! Of course that wouldn't happen, Jay never seems to notice." _Noyem and her thoughts that (as usual) wound around crappy MJ jokes left the village and followed Jay to the overhanging.

Immediately strong hands grasped her shoulders. "I need to talk to you alone, Noyem," said Jay as he propelled Noyem away from the doorway. Noyem felt as if she would have had a heart attack when she felt someone grab her. Realizing that that person was Jay, made her have a heart attack. "_OhAllofMyHolyCrap, what is he going to do? What if he confesses his love for me? What if suddenly he turns three inches taller and his hair goes all windblowny? Like the kind of windblowny that only his hair moves and everything else is the same but his hair blowing through the wind looks all sexy and.."_

"I need to know everything about you, Noyem. No jokes and no changing the subject this time," Jay said. "I need to know before my friends and myself go into something we barely know about."

_"And then he looks all…OH DAMMIT! It was a setup so he can question me to death, AGAIN! Can he possibly think of anything else? Does he even have hormones?" _Noyem sighed and pushed Jay's hands off her. She walked over to the side of the safety rail and leaned against it. "Why does it always end up being that same question? I've told you all you should know." "If I am going to meet the only living family I have left, I need to know _everything_. From the true reason for why you're here to if Mercy is still even alive. " Noyem threw Jay an incredulous stare. "Of course Mercy's alive! If she was dead I wouldn't be here." Noyem crossed her arm and looked below at the cranking and moaning of the gears. Jay stood still, his gaze focusing completely on Noyem. "Why are you really searching?" Noyem opened her mouth to snap a comeback but then stopped. _"Fine, no more stupid lies. I'll tell Creepy-No-Sex-Appeal the whole deal." _"I am going to die, Jay. Even if I find Mercy's son I will be killed. I am here so that my family will not be blamed for my death. If I die out here my blood won't be on their hands." Jay's face remained placid. _"Does he EVER show any emotion? Other than disgust?" _Noyem continued, her eyes staring directly into Jay's. "If I hadn't been born, if I had been a cooperative little girl, my family would practically be on the throne. But thanks to me and my inability to marry and be hung on the wall like a prized stuffed trophy, I have lowered my family's status. That, along with that I never really got along with my mother or father, made them detest me. They would say that I was useless, that it would be better to get rid of me. Finally after a few years, they found their chance."

"I had pulled the last nerve of my mother's impatience. Along with (ACCIDENTLY) killing one of my callers and then throwing one off at his attempt at trying to romance me, I stabbed my mother. It was nothing but a little poke but it still threw me in the _oubliette_," Noyem used a French term that means dungeon. "Since my family couldn't have the bad publicity of killing me, they simply cut a deal with me. If I found Mercy's lost son I could have my freedom. But I realized something when I began my search. I was being played as an idiot. I would never find the true son. I was just wandering around until I was dead." Jay continued to have the impassive, emotionless expression.

"I was ready to accept my fate but I wanted to at least try to find Mercy's son. It was the only thing that kept me going. I never really had any leads to find Mercy's son. I actually just went for any cute guy that walked past me on the street, but sometimes I was serious and went into orphanages and looked for anyone who resembled Mercy. But then someone told me to go to the Legacy." This perked Jay's attention. "Who was it? Do you remember what the person looked like?" "No, he wearing all black and wouldn't show me his face. But he gave me some tickets and I was able to get on a ship. But I stole a dory before it went into port. Jare had told me that I was to stay away from the Legacy since it could put my well being into jeopardy. But I really think he was keeping me away because I could find what I was looking for there. So I thought it would be safer to stay away from port incase there were guards posted there. But when I landed I was attacked by that _thing._" Noyem stopped and saw something flash in Jay's eyes. _"Whoa, was that pity that I saw in his eyes?" _"Well, this story makes more sense than what you were saying yesterday. I think I can actually say I believe you this time." Jay smiled a little. He seemed to understand that Noyem didn't want to talk anymore. "We should go back inside. It's almost time to go and we haven't packed our stuff for the trip yet."

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"Just let me put the collar on!" Noyem struggled with the wiggling form of Pippo. His outfit was lying on the floor alongside his hat. Noyem held him by the scruff of his neck with one hand while the other hand held a disgustingly pink collar. "NO! I will not be forced to wear something so belittling! I have a reputation you know!" "But I got the collar just for! Isn't it cute?" "GET IT AWAY FROM ME! JAY! JAY! HELP!" Jay sat across the scene in the otters' living room. Beside him sat Poppo who wore a bright yellow collar. Poppo sighed dejectedly. "The day has come where are cuteness is used against us. The true horror of it all is that it is being done by _her_." Jay nodded and sighed in agreement. Luckily he was the only one not wearing a collar (although Noyem had tried to make him wear one earlier). Noyem stopped her fight with Pippo to stare at Poppo. "Kinda of a morbid thing you said, Fido." "Hey, we are the otters that raised Jay. If you haven't already noticed his socially unacceptable personality then note that he got it from us. And probably from his horrible life with Solon. But mostly from us."

"WHAT? I'm socially acceptable!" complained Jay in his socially unacceptable personality.

"AND MY NAME IS NOT FIDO!" screamed Poppo completely ignoring Jay.

Noyem had finally won the battle with Pippo. She tightened the collar around his neck until he gagged a little. "Well, your new name is Fido now. You cuties might not be that well known but we don't want anyone recognizing you. And we don't want anyone trying to kill you. So thus you're new names are Fido, Pochi, and Spot." "I like the name Spot I dib it!" the voice came from Quppo who was wearing a baby blue collar. Unlike his brothers he liked the idea of going undercover as dogs. Weird, talking, two legged, otter dogs. Pippo tried to bite his teeming with Barbie pinkness collar off. "I wanth this offth!" Noyem grabbed Pippo and put him in her lap. "Now, now, little Pochi. Calm down and let me put on your leash." "LEASH! I will NOT wear a LEASH! You put that thing on me and I swear I will claw you to death!" Noyem took a frilly matching pink leash that laid beside her and clipped it on Pippo AKA Pochi. "Aw, now you're the cutest little doggy here!" "Please kill me," mumbled Pippo AKA Pochi as he held the stripping- of-any-male-otter's-pride leash in his paws.

"Remember doggies, that you are doggies! You have to walk on four legs and bark. None of this 'ors' that you repeat every few seconds," said Noyem. She stood in front of the three dog wannabes a blue and yellow leash in her hands for Spot and Fido. "So start your barking practice!" Noyem snapped throwing the two leashes on the floor.

"Bark," moaned Pippo/Pochi.

"BARK, BARK!" barked Quppo/Spot happily as he wagged his tail and stood on four legs.

"Screw you," barked Poppo/Fido.

Jay shook his head as he saw his 'parents' be reduced to family pets. Quppo/Spot and Poppo/Fido fastened their leashes to their color coordinated collars. "If only Noyam wasn't so crazy about her whole disguising us deal. If only we could distract her somehow," said Pippo/Pochi as he held his leash in his paws, looking at it like it was about to come alive and eat him. "Wait! I just remembered something," exclaimed Poppo/Fido. He ran past Noyem who was brushing Quppo/Spot's fluffy brown hair to try and make it more dog-like. Poppo/Fido climbed on top of the three leveled bunk bed where the otter brothers slept. He scrambled to the top bed and pulled something down. "Here it is!" Poppo/Fido hopped down holding with him a beautiful silver and green dress (two chapters back the otters had said they would make Noyem a new outfit). Noyem dropped the brush and gasped.

It was truly a gown to behold. The material was unlike any ever seen before, almost a shiny but yet soft to the touch like look. The dress looked as if it wouldn't extend farther than mid thigh but a pair of stockings could easily fix that (depending on if Noyem wanted the dress to show her thigh or not). The skirt was full round with no side cut. A pattern of silver swirls decorated the skirt and extended up to the chest where it formed more arrays of symmetrical designs. The sleeves were poofy at the end with small shells bordering the edge. The dress wouldn't have looked right in our world, but in the world of TOL it was a fashion miracle. Along with looking like it would fit her perfectly and match her hair, the dress was perfect for Noyem. Only one thing bothered her. "The chest swoops down too low," said Noyem softly.

"Yeah but I thought you would like that," Poppo/Fido said a note of hurt in his voice. "I made it just for you." "I thought you were the type of person who would like wearing something that showed your chest off," added Jay, speaking once again in his socially unacceptable personality. Noyem raised an eyebrow and placed her hands on her hips. She gave Jay the evil eye. "The type of person? THE TYPE OF PERSON? Excuse me, Fashionly Handicapped, but did you just classify me?" "Yes, I did, and you're lucky I didn't describe your classification in any other way," Jay smiled his I-Know-All smirk. _"Is he intelligently saying that I'm _(can't use the W word so I will put it in other words) _like a Paris Hilton? That little cheeky..!" _Noyem spun around so she wasn't facing Jay anymore and took the dress from Poppo/Fido. "Thank you for making me this, Poppo. But if you don't mind I'll wait to wear it later."

Noyem held the dress delicately. She looked down at it again and sighed. _"They wouldn't understand the real reason for why I can't wear it." _

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INTERMISSION: That is so right, I used Paris Hilton in a simile. I'm not being judgmental over her or anything I actually liked the Simple Life shows. But, and everyone has to admit it, she is a bit…what's a good word?….opposite of nice and nonwhoreish. In the way of her being a bit self-centered. But yet that is a good thing. Throughout the episodes of Simple Life she and Nicole asked men to strip. I thank them for that. Really, really, thank them for that. Also blonde people (not all) but some really get on my nerves. I guess it's cuz I'm brunet and blondes and brunets are like born to hate each other. It has been so since the dawn of time. ANYWAYS, back to the fanfic. Sorry if I offended anyone go ahead and take Nicole's autobiography and shove it into my eye if you're mad. My cousin does it all the time. She says it's a good way to relieve stress.

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"Norma, why do you have to have so many bags?" asked Will. The whole group, Senel, Chloe, Will, Jay, Noyem, Shirley, Norma, and the otters (the presence of Moses could be sensed but no one could see him), were standing outside the bridge entrance to Weritis Beacon. Everyone had agreed to meet there before they set off for Port-On-Rage. Jay, Noyem, and the otters had just arrived by duct when they were greeted by the most bizarre spectacle. A mountain of bags blocked the entrance to Weritis Beacon. "But, Teach, we might be in G-Land for days! I had to pack for everything. And don't worry about me getting hurt, Red is moving it all," Norma pointed proudly to the bottom of the endless travel bag pile. A single tattooed and tanned hand stuck out. It twitched slightly. "You hired an ass to carry your luggage?" asked Jay. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING AN ASS?" said the mountain of bags, shaking slightly at the force it yelled. "No one, just the mule carrying Norma's stuff," replied Jay coolly.

Chloe sighed. A single backpack was strapped to her shoulder. She was an expert on light packing. "Jay, stop making fun of Sandor. We should try to pull him out before he dies of being crushed or devoid of oxygen." Shirley giggled slightly, two small bags in her left hand. "Yeah, but who wants to try to push all of that off Moses?" "I'm not doing it," said Senel. Like Chloe he had a backpack hanging off his shoulders. "I wouldn't approach that even if someone paid me. It's too dangerous." "Someone has to or else no one will be able to go in and out of town," Will said. He began looking around. "Wait a minute where's Harriet?" "DAD! HELP!" cried Harriet. She was on top of the one hundred foot tall bag pile, clinging to a Louis Vuitton designer suitcase.

"HARRIET!" screamed Will. Everyone looked up to see the young girl grasping to the bag for life. The otter brothers ran up and stood close to the edge of the pile. "Jump, Harriet!" said Pippo/Pochi. "We'll catch you!" said Poppo/Fido. "Bark," said Quppo/Spot. "Don't worry, we'll catch you too!" reassured Senel as he and everyone else who wasn't a three foot creature prepared to catch the jumping girl. Harriet cautiously walked over a few bags, her father's own old fashion brief case in her hands. She reached the end of the pile. "OK, here I come," shouted Harriet as she closed her eyes and pushed off the pile. But instead of jumping off the bag her foot pushed back began to shake. Instantly the whole bag mountain began to shake. After one gut wrenching second the entire pile of bags began to collapse.

Everyone screamed and moved out of the way before they were hit by the falling luggage. Harriet was able to ride safely to ground thanks to the Louis Vuitton that she landed on. Moses on the other hand…was buried under even more luggage. After the dust cleared the bags were everywhere. "Oopsie," said Harriet as she stood before the chaos. Senel, Chloe, Will, Norma, Jay, Noyem, and the otters had ducked in cover under a large tree. When Will saw her he stood up and ran over to as quickly as a caring parent can (which for the record is 99MPH). Will began to talk just as fast. "Are you alright? Did you break any bones? Did you hit your hit you head? Did-"

"I'm just fine, Dad. Here," Harriet gave her father his bag. "You guys can go ahead and leave. I'll get Curtis and Isabella to help clean all of this up." Harriet looked back at the bags that littered every available space. "Hmmm, I guess I did pack a little too much," thought Norma out loud as the group walked over to Harriet and Will. "Yeah, ONLY A LITTLE," said Moses as he pulled himself out of a pile. "Just grab what ya need, Bubbles, and then let's get movin'. " "But I need all of this…"

"NO YOU DON"T!"

Finally, after everyone had recovered from the avalanche of Norma's stuff, the group (minus Harriet who had been told to stay home to be in charge of the cleaning crew, which was really just a good excuse for her to stay safely in Weritis Beacon) began walking towards Port-On-Rage. The path was short and went through fields of flowing grass. The weather was peaceful and only a single cloud floated through the sky. A light sea breeze carried the salty smell of the not-so-far-off ocean. "I could have carried more," complained Norma who was dragging only twelve bags. A tiny portion compared to her amount earlier. "How did you even pack all of that?" asked Shirley. "Easy, Red did it." "How did you get it out of the inn?" "Red did it." "How did you organize that into such a pile?" "Red did it." "How did...Oh never mind," said Shirley.

Noyem lagged along behind, talking only when someone addressed her. The only ones really talking to her were the otters anyway. "Noyam, do you think Jay's mom will really like us?" asked Quppo (the otters were allowed to walk on two legs until they reached Port-On-Rage) for about the hundredth time. "Mercy loves animals, and I know she'll be thrilled once she realizes that you guys can talk." Noyem smiled at the otters who were grouped together to discuss how exactly they would greet Mercy.

"I think we should pile drive her, so she'll be surprised," offered Poppo. "I think I should play a song for her…like Don't You Dare Leave Babies Alone in Cribs that are Outside," offered Pippo. "I think we should-" But Quppo was cut off by Noyem. "Shhhhh, don't you hear that?" whispered Noyem. She had been concentrating on the surrounding scenery. "I think something is following us." The group ahead turned around to face Noyem. They knew that only weak monsters lived in this area and that there was noting to fear. "Don't sound so scared, Yammy, it's probably nothing. Come up here and join us! You've been sulking over there since-"

Norma stopped talking at the sound of something gliding through the long grass. The sky became darker and a macabre presence filled the air. Noyem froze as she felt the presence. _"I know this feeling…it's that thing…" _A crackling voice split through the thick aura. "It's a pleasure to see you again, murderer."

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AFTERWORD: KK, ending sucked but it leaves you hanging off the ends of your seat right?All super suspenseful? Or at least a little suspenseful? Kinda? Maybe like just a millimeter of suspense? (Cries) I was watching TV while I typed this! I wasn't paying attention! I'm so sorry! I wanted to see if I could concentrate on South Park while typing this at the same time. Didn't really work (hehehehe, Cartman's funny though.)

Jay: Tsk, tsk. Watching something as mundane as South Park? The shame.

Me: AHHHHHHH! Holy firetrucks you're alive again! It's a horrible miracle. And South Park is not mundane! It's funny!

Jay: Like you trying to fit in at school. Pityingly hilarious!

Me: I fit in! With the blind kids (they don't run away from me cuz they can't see me).

Jay: That is seriously really sad.

Me: Hey Jay can you hand me that package over there.

Jay: This (hands me a brown cardboard box)? What's in it?

Me: BULLETS FOR MY OVERLY LARGE AND COMICAL LOOKING MACHINE GUN! Muhaheheaheheheh! Now I just got to open the box (tries to bite through tape) Not working (takes knife) Won't cut (gives to rabid bunny) Not being torn open.

Jay: I'll be in my trailer when you're done losing your mind.

Whoa, Jay lives in a trailer? Never mind. The next chapter will be up….in a couple of days..weeks..months…as long as my suffering at school lasts. OH, thanks for the reviews again. You can probably talk to you liver if you just yell at it real loud, KamikazeHikira (that review almost made me choke on my coke cuz I was laughing so hard) And thanks Rabbit and other people who read this. Til next apocalypse! I mean til next time!


	9. Kissing Booth

I do not own Tales of Legendia. Really the only thing I own is my dignity…and it's only worth 45 cents down at the General Dollar Store. Maybe I should trade my dignity for a milky way bar those are really good, better tasting than dignity…ANYWAYS, I am back! I am back to write, back to ramble, back to annoy, back to review, and… back to cough and hack all over my computer. That's right: I'm sick. I don't know with what but it kept me home from going to school on Friday (which I shouldn't have missed cuz I have a science project due: make a toy car move by using only a mouse trap, so I'm using the mouse trap to catch really smart mice so they can drive the toy car for me. So far that's not working). But since I am sick I have more time to contemplate my life and realize how many times a day someone spits in my hair at school. Ah, isn't life wonderful? (spit drips off back ponytail) ANYWAYS, it is time to get writing chapter nine aka KISSING BOOTH! Sorry it took so long AGAIN, SCHOOL just like kills whatever writing ability I have and it's not like I had a good one in the first place SOB (darn school, when will you learn to stop killing individuals? And when will you stop having those boring pep rallies?). Now, everyone, truthfully admit if you were anxious or not for this to come out. At least three of you? Two? One? (teardrop) None? Well, this chapter is gonna be SUPER HARD for me to write (if you haven't already realized this I write my before-word before actually writing the story). I'm going to have to do it from JAY's point of view AND describe a BATTLE scene. Both at which I am HORRIBLE at….I need that milky way before I actually start writing. Where's my dignity so I can buy it? ANYWAYS chapter nine, Kissing Booth (guess what it's about before reading and I might give you a milky way bar….MIGHT) Read on about the horror…if you DARE! (dramatic music plays while I stuff milky way bar in my face) Mmmmmm, chocolate good.

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Jay knew the look of terror when it was on someone's face. Their eyes would widen, breathing quickened into a sharp gasp, pupils shrinking into the colored iris, a trembling lip. These were the signs that someone showed when they were confronted by fearsome proportions. Proportions beyond their control and ability to handle. Proportions as terrifying as facing your worst incubus. Lost where one's common sense and replaced by a cold primeval fear. A fear as ancient and terrifying as…seafood.

Jay pushed his way forward through the traveling party. Everyone had stopped to look at Noyem who had suddenly fallen to the ground, whimpering. _"Did one of the Oresoren bring some shrimp with them? They know she can't stand anything that was once living underwater." _Jay shouldered his way past Moses and Senel. Will, Chloe, Moses, Senel, and Shirley had formed almost a wall from one side of the path across to the other. Jay had been ahead of the whole group so he had missed whatever had distracted everyone else. Once Jay could see Noyem and Norma, who had fallen on the ground beside her, he sensed a charge filtering in the air. Call it Jay's super spider sense, but he knew that something, something vile, was hidden in the grass. "What happened?"

"There's something strange over there," said Norma in a shaky voice. She scrambled onto her feet and pointed to a figure farther down the path. "What is it?" asked Moses as he squinted his eyes to try and see better. "Is it causing this weird feeling?" Chloe took her backpack off and laid it on the ground. She curled her hand around the sword handle at her waist. "Whatever it is, it scared Noyem pretty bad." Senel offered a hand to the fallen girl, but Noyem stood up on her own. "It's that thing…that horrible, horrible, thing that…that made me do the thing I regret most in life…kissing Freaky Mc. Short Loser." "Are you calling ME that?" shouted Jay. Jay was really the one who regretted that day. He had always expected his first kiss to be enjoyable. A feeling of love passing between two people. An almost tender comforting feeling. Not the feeling of being pushed onto a wall and being attacked. "Really, Noyem, Jay, you two need to get over that," sighed Will as he held the fuming Jay away from attacking Noyem. Noyem stuck her tongue out. "Yeah forget it, Jay Boy, you won't be getting another from me or anyone else." " Don't worry, I'll remember that traumatic experience for the rest of my life," Jay mumbled. For the moment everyone forgot the overwhelming presence of evil in front of them and began adding their own comments (funny how people become distracted so easily). "Jay and Noyams kissed! Wow, we never knew Jay would do something like that!" The otter brothers stared at Jay with wide eyes. "Aw, I think it was sweet how Jay FINALLY showed an interest in the ladies! He was scarin' me for awhile." Moses laughed and slapped Jay on the back. "It looked like you enjoyed it too, JJ. You were blushing and everything!" "I don't think so, Norma, he actually looked scared afterwards. He froze up and I had to shake him before he actually responded. What do you think Senel?" Shirley looked at Senel quizzically. "I wouldn't know anything about it. What about you, Chloe?" "W-what makes you say that? I don't know anything about k-kiss…that!"

_"Why does the topic of every conversation feels like it comes to this?" _Jay sighed. He began turning around. The sooner he got to Gadoria the better. The sooner he got there, the sooner he could finally start unwinding the mystery of Noyem's origin and of his own. _"All of these days have been too hectic and random it's finally time to start-" _Suddenly Jay was pushed back by an invisible force. Jay landed on his back feet away from where he had been standing. A sore pain began creeping through his body. "What was that?" grumbled Jay as he pushed himself up. Will turned around to see what had caused such a tremendous amount of power. "Everyone, look!"

"Finally, it's time you murderous humans noticed us!" The words had come out full of venom and spite. It was the sound of a voice full of hatred. "This is the day we will gain revenge for what you've done!" Another wave of energy hit but this time it spread everywhere. Senel and Chloe tired to block the attack physically but the two were only thrown back farther. Shirley, being one of the lightest, was completely knocked off her feet and landed a few feet away Jay. Moses, being one of the heaviest, skidded across the ground and hit his back against a tree. Norma had been smart enough to try and avoid the attack had throwing herself on the ground. Will, who really had the only common sense, protected himself by summoning his eres and creating a shield but the strange power broke through it causing the scholar to be forced back. Noyem had gathered the otters and shoved them into the long grass before being thrown back herself. "What was that?" asked Norma as she wiped away trickle of blood that was running down her lip. "Some sort of monster…a very powerful one," answered Will. "Like I was saying earlier, it's that monster. The one that nearly killed me," said Noyem. She stood up, reaching into her pocket. "But there's another one behind us, making it two evil little monsters."

"Wrong, little girl, very wrong." The air seemed to darken as more creatures began showing themselves. The creature who had been talking earlier approached the group more closely, allowing everyone to see its disoriented features. It almost looked like any other eren monster the group had encountered but this one was far more powerful and uglier. The face was disfigured looking as if it was held together by a long scar that ran straight down the middle of the head. It looked almost as if it had been stitched unevenly, the right eye was above the left and it's mouth wasn't even connected. Swollen tissue and more scars ran across more sides of it face covered in a dried yellow puss. When it spoke again it's black dress lifted showing the hand of a rotten corpse. "Do you remember me, little murderer?" Before Noyem could reply the other creature who had been behind the group glided forward quickly and grasped it's nails around Noyem's throat. It was identical to the other eren but a scar ran diagonal across its face. "We now have orders to kill you, Murderer. But of course we were going to kill you no matter what since you destroyed our sisters!" It spat in Noyem's face and threw her down to the ground. "This is going to be enjoyable." The creature lifted Noyem off the ground and wrapped its claws around her neck.

"Move out of the way!" Jay rose shakily to his feet. He used the last reserve of energy that hadn't been taken by the potent attack earlier to aim his dagger at the creature and throw it. Noyem ducked her head while the dagger flew past the air and landed in the eren's face. The creature staggered backwards, letting go of Noyem. It fell to the ground, completely motionless. "Go, Jay! That's how you protect your girl!" cheered Moses, who even in a weaken state, could be still be overly annoying. "Shut up, Moses, there are still others." Jay looked around. In total there were seven erens left, each one in a position that made escape impossible. And with his only weapon lodged in the face of a dead monster that left Jay completely defenseless. "How dare you kill one of us, human! We were going to destroy you quickly but now you have insured a painful death," hissed the creature with the vertical scar. It gathered its power to unleash another chain of attacks. The group was left completely open and they wouldn't be able to survive another hit from the creature's eres.

"R-revive," stammered Norma. No one had noticed Norma barely standing her body in a spell casting position. Instantly a green light flowed out of Norma and began spreading towards the others. Usually the healing spell was weak and only offered a small amount of energy and strength but the spell had grown in power. Everyone could feel the warmth of their strength returning. "I didn't know you could be so powerful, Norma," remarked Chloe. The knight had risen to her feet, drawing her sword as she spoke. "Yeah, Bubbles, usually your healing spells suck." Moses stepped out from beneath the branches of the tree, a spear already in his hands. "Hey! You guys should be thankful! I just saved every single butt here!" said Norma. "Cut it out, Norma, we need to deal with these freaks," said Senel, jumping up and down lightly to warm himself up before her attacked. The eren had stopped casting its spell, it looked at the group with contempt. "You fools, no matter what you try, you will die here." At its words, every creature dashed forward.

"Dammit," cursed Jay as he avoided an eren that had delved straight towards him. He tried to move closer to where the dead eren was but another creature was blocking his way. _"I'm completely useless without my dagger, I can't perform eres or anything." _An eren with a scar running horizontally across its face swiped at Jay with his claws. Jay jumped back from the attack and kicked the creature before it had a chance to catch him off guard. While it was still down Jay tired to run to his dagger again but another eren blocked his way. "You're not going anywhere, little boy." Jay grimaced, the eren was larger than the other one and probably even stronger _"Trying to get rid of this one bear-handed won't be easy." _"Jay, catch!" Jay looked up to see his dagger being thrown through the air straight at him. He caught it expertly. "Thank you, Shirley." Shirley was knelt down by the dead eren. She nodded her head in reply. Jay slid the dagger into his pocket and faced the eren. "Sorry, but no one calls me 'little boy' and gets away alive." Jay charged at the eren running with his hands in his pockets. He moved with inhuman speed and began stabbing at the creature with punches and jabs of the concealed blade. The creature had no way to defend itself, Jay moved too fast for it to react. Finally Jay jumped away and stabbed his dagger into the ground. "What are you doing? Abandoning your weapon again you little-" The sound of shattering ice could be heard directly beneath it. Before the eren could blink ice broke through the ground and sliced straight into the body of the eren. A torrent of sickening yellow blood gushed out of the monster's body. Jay raised one hand, his fingernails still slightly glowing even after the ere. "You don't use the word 'little' when you're speaking to me." Jay yanked the knife out of the ground and put it back in his pocket. _"That's one down. The one I kicked away earlier must still be alive along with the other five." _

Jay turned to face the rest of the party that was fighting the other monsters. Shirley had rejoined Will and Norma who were trying to cast crystal eres. Two erens were being held off by Will who was hitting away the creatures with his hammer. Norma was trying to help by blowing bubbles in ones face. "Red, get over here and protect us!" "Kinda busy right now, Bubbles!" Moses narrowly dodged a eren that was trying to bite him with two crooked incisor teeth. He took his spear and tried to keep the monster off him but he was shoved from behind by another. "Get these things off me!" "Hold on, Sandor." Chloe was stabbing vigorously at a bleeding eren that seemed barely alive. She dispatched it with one hit from her sword. Then she took her sword and ran it along the ground. A shockwave shot up and struck the eren with the creepy teeth, causing the monster to fall to the ground. Moses stabbed the eren with a spear before it could get up. "Senel, how you holding up?"

Senel was dodging a blow caused by the 'leader' of the strange monsters. It was panting heavily and was obviously losing. "Just fine," answered Senel as he began kicking the eren in a flurry of quick kicks that defied gravity. _"Wait, where's Noyem? Did she run off?" _Jay shook his head. He didn't care at the moment where she was, he decided to focus on protecting the crystal eres casters. Jay threw his dagger at the eren attacking Will. The blade caught fire at contact and exploded before the creature. The other eren attacking the group stopped and floated quickly away. "We need to get away from here! They're too strong for us!" It wasn't the usually 'dripping with malice' voice the creature was using before, it sounded high-pitched and whiney while it was running away. "No! We still have one more trick!" The eren fighting Senel blocked Senel's punch and pushed him to the ground. It floated towards the other creature and turned towards the group below them. "We can still finish them off with one spell." "Oh yes, the death spell," hissed the other eren.

"What? Did it say death spell?" Norma looked up to see the last two remaining monsters begin muttering a incantation. "Well, it didn't say the non-death spell, Bubbles. So yeah, it probably said death spell." "How can you be so calm! Hello? DEATH SPELL!" "Calm down, Norma, I'm sure it's just something like _Absolute_ or _Black Hole_," reassured Will. But (horrible and deadly irony) a black pool formed beneath the feet of Will, Norma, Moses, Shirley, Jay, Senel, and Chloe. "No, this death spell **will** kill you." The eren turned it's grotesque features into a smirk. The black pool beneath the party grew larger. "I-I can't breathe.." gasped Chloe. She fell to the ground, her body slowly beginning to melt into the dark featureless pool. "Chloe.." Senel tried to reach for Chloe's hand but he couldn't move. Shirley then fell to the ground too, coughing violently. "Shirley, hold on," said Jay straining to talk as he tried to move. _"It's no use…we won't get out here. All of us are going to-" _

"Wow, you guys make a good death scene. All struggling and stuff. But don't worry, I'll get you guys out there in no time. Just gotta recite some corny lines." _"Noyem! That's it we really ARE going to die." _Noyem walked up the path, standing beside the pool of death that was slowly killing everyone. She seemed completely uninjured and unfazed. In fact she looked almost happy. She gave everyone a wink. "Stay alive for a few ten seconds or so. Gotta deal with the ugly faced china dolls." "Just HURRY UP!" growled Will as he struggled to keep his head above the swarm of darkness.

"O Sorrowful Soul hear me cry out to thee,"

"Take revenge on your pain's past and aid me,"

"Turn your hate into- Eh, I forget the rest." Noyem held her hand out in front of her. "Soul's Hatred." A thin blue light extended in front of the two erens. An electrical charge pulsed through the light. Instantly it exploded in lightening and ice. The creatures were stabbed by the sharp ice and electrified, at the same time. As expected, the creatures fell down, dead.

"Way to go, Yammy! At first I thought you ditched us. What were you doing while we were fighting for our lives?" Norma pulled herself out of the slowly shrinking inky blackness. Soon everyone was free from darkened area. "I was getting the doggies some place safe. Didn't want them getting hurt in the fight of course." "It took you that long to hide the Oresoren?" asked Will. "Well they kept saying they wanted to join the fight so I kinda had to…knock them out so they would cooperate better."

Jay gave Noyem a look of utter hatred. "You WHAT?" "Only choice." "Don't get so mad, Jay, I'm sure Noyem was just thinking of the otter's safety," said Shirley calmly. "Safety or not that is pretty harsh," added Moses. "I should-" started Jay.

"SILENCE!"

Jay stopped moving, he felt something hold him down. The black pool was back. "What the-" Tendrils of the darkness sprang upwards and began crawling into Jay throat. "JAY! What happened" Moses put a hand on Jay's shoulder but that only caused the darkness to seep towards him. "What the hell?" Senel took a cautionary step forward. The black veins launched on to him. "COOLIDGE!" "SENEL!" And just like the Senel crazy girls they are, Chloe and Shirley grabbed onto Senel. And (guess what) the evil black thingys leeched onto them too.

"What is going on?" Norma looked around panic stricken. "Don't move towards Jay, Norma. Some of the spell from before must have clung to him. We'll have to break them out of there somehow." "No use, already done," Noyem walked up from behind Will and Norma. She held her knife in one hand dripping with yellow blood. "One of the monsters was still alive and it decided to leave a gift for us." "What are you talking about, Yammy?" "The horrible, horrible, silencing spell."

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"OK you maggots, it's time to get to business! You guys were dumb enough to get hit by the curse so I'm gonna make sure you're smart enough to get out of it!" Noyem marched military like in front of Jay, Moses, Senel, Chloe, and Shirley. Noyem snapped her feet together. "ATTENTION!" Jay, Moses, Senel, Chloe, and Shirley snapped their feet together clumsily. They weren't looking at Noyem but really they weren't focused on anything either. They couldn't. They were blindfolded. _"When will this end?" _sighed Jay. He would have said it aloud if he could talk. But neither Senel, Chloe, Moses, and Shirley could talk too. All of them other than Noyem, Norma, and Will were under the silencing curse.

Jay remembered what Noyem had directly yelled after the dark tendrils had melted away. "CLOSE YOU EYES NOW!" "What is going on, Yammy, what's wrong with them?" "They have been hit by the same thing I had, the curse thingy," said Noyem. "You mean the one where you couldn't talk? And the one where you had to-Oh geez." Norma had looked among the confused blind group pityingly. "I sure feel sorry for all of you." But by Norma's tone of voice, she didn't sound sorry at all. Chloe had opened her mouth to say something but no sound had come out. "I see, does that mean the same 'rule' applies?" asked Will. "Yup, the first person one of these guys see is gonna be in an awkward position." Norma had noticed that Noyem had used the word 'person.' "But I thought it had to be a girl for a guy and a guy for a girl?" "Nope, just people." "So lets say Red saw JJ first does that mean…" "Hot men on men action." At that moment Jay had almost brought out his dagger to stab himself. _"Bad…mental...image." _

"Are you sure you two know what you're doing?" Will folded his arms across his chest and looked at the unlucky group sympathetically. "Of course we know what we're doing, Teach. We're professionals," said Norma. She placed her hands on her hips and smiled proudly. "Professional what?" Norma froze. "Um…professional kissing booth setters!" Will shook his head. "This is what happens when I'm surrounded by teenagers." Will sighed. "Get it done quickly you two, we need to leave before anything else attacks us and pick up the Oresoren, wherever Noyem put them." "Don't fret, these guys will be yammering in no time," proclaimed Noyem happily. "While you two are SERIOUSLY," Will practically shouted the word, "curing everyone of the curse I will be taking samples from the eren monsters." Even though Will spoke SERIOUSLY he sounded excited about taking samples from an unknown, unrecorded monster. "OK, Teach, go skip away happily and become Raynerd," said Norma as she watched Will closely examine the body of dead creature. When Will had moved out of hearing distance Noyem snickered. "Who is going to be the first victim?" _"Maybe I should just stab myself now, before it gets any worse." _Jay felt like a cold chill had passed through him. _"Although it's impossible for it to get any worse at this point." _

Noyem and Norma were standing a few feet away from him, whispering to each other. _"Just cause I'm blind doesn't mean I can't hear." _"I say we let them all loose, let them deal with what they have and watch the funny scene unfold." It was Noyem who said that. _"Oh, god no." _"No way! That's not fun enough. We need to pair everyone up." The amusement in that voice made it Norma's. "I mean, don't you want to be with JJ?" _"UGH! Rather chance Moses." _"NO, I mean sure I guess if that's really the only option...Willy probably needs Jay to help him 'analyze' the situation." _"I should kill myself now."_ "That's not what I was talking about, Yammy. But sure if you want to make-out with JJ again." "Ew, no! Let's just…oh. Who do you want to pair up with each other?" Norma thought for a moment. "Well, C has had the huge thing for Senny for ages but she had never made any moves. Maybe I can help her _see _the light." "That takes care of those two then. But what about Moses, Jay, and Blondie?" "We'll figure them out later." "I still think we should get Jay out of the way first." "Then you do it." "If there is no other choice…"

Jay would have screamed, if he could. He tried to move back but only ended up bumping into someone. Jay grabbed the sleeve of whoever it was to balance himself. _"Wait a minute this feels like…" _Jay couldn't help it, he turned around took a small peek over the blindfold and stared right at (make a two second guess real fast)…

Shirley.

Noyem noticed that one of her 'charges' was out of line."You idiot! I told you that you weren't suppose to take off your blindfold!" Noyem ran over to Jay and yanked the blindfold off his face. "Now you have to kiss _her_. You totally ruined the whole plan Norma and me set up!" Norma joined Noyem and began giggling. "Well, this does take care of JJ first." "OH! You idiot!" Noyem threw the blindfold to the ground and began pounding it with her foot. Soon a miniature sized crater was in the ground where Noyem's foot was. Jay stood blankly for a few seconds. Then the realization hit him and he could think of only one word: _YAY! _

Shirley had heard everything that was being said and was looking around nervously. She had no idea where anyone was and didn't know that 'her' was referring to herself. "Let's hit two lovers with one stone then," said Norma. She took Shirley by the shoulders and steered her in front of Jay. She whisked the blindfold off. "Ta-da! Here you go Shirl. Read it and weep." Shirley instantly turned a bright crimson when she saw Jay, the first person in her line of vision. Shirley looked to her left. There stood the other blindfolded people (Moses had been tied up, just in case) and first (really second) to her sight was Senel . If only she had turned a few inches…

Jay didn't know what to do. He didn't know if he felt happy, shocked, or embarrassed. So instead all of those feelings were wrapped up in one pile of emotions that leveled down to one thought: _What am I going to do? _Jay didn't know whether to go to Shirley or wait for her. Should he try to make a move first? Maybe try to act like he was unhappy at the situation like she was or…

"TAKING TOO LONG!" Noyem grabbed Jay by the ponytail and Shirley by a lock of blonde hair. Then she did the most probable thing someone like her would do in that situation. She rammed their heads together, or to put more accurately their lips. "What the hell did you do that for!" screamed Jay as he pulled himself out of Noyem's grip. "Ow, that hurt." Shirley raised a hand to her lip that was turning into a sore red and rubbed it. "_Voila_, they can talk now." Noyem placed her hands on her hips and jutted her lip out. "It was the only thing I could do to make you and Blondie girl finally get it over with, lover boy." _"Lover boy?"_ "You didn't have to do it so hard," huffed Shirley as she kept rubbing her lip that was now becoming swollen. "Guess I don't know my own hatred…I mean strength." Jay sighed sadly and let his head roll down to his chest. His second kiss had been worse than his first one. _"And Shirley will probably never look at me again." _"Jay, are you OK? Did you get hurt too?" Jay lifted his head to see Shirley with her hand on his shoulder talking to him. "N-n-no, I'm just fine. Sorry about your lip." "It's not your fault. Well, kinda in a way it is." Shirley began to laugh. "I won't hold it against you if you don't hold it against me." Jay looked at her confused. "What is that suppose to mean?" "Oh, nothing." Jay smiled he opened his mouth to say something else but suddenly a raucous voice broke through the silence.

"DO IT ALREADY, C! C'MON! STOP BEING SO SCARED!" Norma had (while the Jay and Shirley thing had been going on) taken Senel and Chloe away from everyone else and led them underneath a tree. She was trying to shove the stone still Chloe onto a confused Senel. Both of their blindfolds were off. "MOVE!" Norma was leaning against knight and pushing her with all of her strength. Chloe wouldn't budge. "What are you doing, Norma?" asked Jay as he saw that Chloe's face had drained of all color and her eyes were too wide. "C, won't move and Senny's not much help either! And this is the only way too since they saw each other first," answered Norma. She returned to her shoving. "C'MON, C, MOVE!" Noyem walked over to the group, rolling up her sleeves as she did so. "Do they need a little help?" "I'm sure C doesn't need your jealousy strength over Shirl right now. No offense, Yammy, but that was creepy." Noyem slit her eyes. "What?" "You're jealous over Shirl because she got to kiss JJ so you shoved them onto each other. It is so apparent it's-" Noyem took Norma by the shoulders. "You know what, I think we're forgetting about someone."

"What do you mean?" Noyem didn't answer, she just pointed at the blindfolded tied up figure of Moses. "Yammy…what are you going to do…wait, Yammy!" Noyem began dragging Norma to Moses. "I didn't mean it I swear just don't do this, Yammy! Please! I thought you were my friend! YAMMY!" Noyem turned to Jay. "Get Moses ready for me, Jay, please." Jay smiled. He was still mad at Noyem for what she had done, but seeing Norma under torture was too good to resist. "JJ! NO! PLEASE! Wouldn't it be a better world without a talking Red?" Jay stopped for a moment. _"She has a good point…" _"Jay, just do what I tell you," commanded Noyem in an overly sweet laced with venom voice. "OK, fine." Jay held Moses by the shoulders and began untying the ropes that bound his hands together. Finally Jay went behind Moses and was ready to drop the blindfold. "Ready." Noyem hid behind Norma, keeping a firm grasp on the struggling girl's shoulders. "Release the monster…I mean get rid of the blindfold." Jay let go of the blindfold.

Moses blinked the bright sunlight out of his eye. After rubbing his eyes he opened them to see Norma. "Yammy, JJ, I hate you two!" said Norma as she looked upon the fate she had been dealt. "You have to do it, Norma," taunted Noyem. "FINE! Red, get over here right now!" Moses backed away. "Red! It's the only way! Get over here!" Moses sighed defeated. Jay almost felt pity for him. Almost.

Moses slowly trudged over to Norma who had closed her eyes as if expecting a bomb to be unleashed. Moses swallowed. He softly placed a hand on one side of her face and bent down. The kiss lasted for barely half a second. "PHHHHTTT!" Norma began wiping her mouth off disgustingly. "That was so…DISGUSTING!" "Aw, admit, Bubbles, you liked it," teased Moses, happy to finally to be able to speak again. "In your dreams!" screamed Norma as she spat on the ground. Jay couldn't help but feel envious of Moses. The stupid bandit got a normal kiss, Jay got pummeled into Shirley's face.

"Are all of you done yet?" Will had returned from his monster examination. He had taken bottles (that had been in his suitcase) and used them to store pieces of the dead eren monsters. He put them back into his suitcase and was carrying it at his side. "Yeah I think everyone is…wait Senel and Valens are still quiet." Noyem gestured her head to the tree. Shirley had taken Norma's place and was trying to push Senel towards Chloe. Still no progress. Will sighed. "Get it over with you two." Everyone walked to the tree to see Shirley between Senel and Chloe, trying to copy Noyem's move. "You don't even have to kiss really just put your lips together." Shirley struggling just trying to push their heads together. "It will be only for a second! It doesn't hurt." "Be a man, Senel," scoffed Moses. "I did it and ya don't see me dead." "Really we'll miss the boat if we don't hurry up," informed Jay. "I already found the Oresoren so don't worry about searching for them. But that still leaves us with only ten minutes." Will looked down at a watch that Harriet had given to him for Father's Day. It was a bright hot pink with a plastic strap. "Just do it you, cowards," mumbled Noyem sourly.

Finally Senel gently pushed Shirley away and gave Chloe a quick peck on the cheek. "That doesn't work you have to do it on the lips!" quipped Norma. "Actually I think this just worked." Senel smiled while everyone stared open mouthed. Chloe before she could possibly turn any redder gave Senel a quick brush across the cheek. "Thanks, Coolidge, I was kind of acting childish before," Chloe bowed her head. "Please forgive my behavior." Strangely she talked as if she were almost disappointed in a way.

"So this whole time…" started Shirley.

"…we could have just…"

"…kissed each other's cheek?" finished Moses.

Noyem smiled weakly. "Sorry, I guess that could have worked for you guys too…but wasn't this more fun?"

Jay, Moses, Shirley, and Norma clenched their fist. Their anger was coming off in waves. "So you knew this whole time?"

"Ummm…what would happened if I say yes?"

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AFTERWORD: YES! Finally done writing this sucky chapter. Huzzah! Huzzah! Only one more until my tenthenial! And after that it is over with the comedy and time to start acting serious to answer the questions. But don't worry, it's nearly impossible for me to write seriously. And more importantly I'm done with this chapter. YAY! This calls for DRAGON QUEST! (happily reaches into the Dragon Quest game cover) GASPING SURPRISE? WHERE IS MY DRAGON QUEST?

Jay: Looking for this? (holds game disk)

Me: Give it back now!

Jay: And what are you going to do about it?

Me: This. (reaches into pocket) OVERLY SMALL AND OVERLY DESTRUCTIVE HAND GERNADE! (throws it at Jay)

Jay: What the- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(Really big exploding sound here)

Me: HAHAHAHA! Wait…that just means I blew up my Dragon Quest game too…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Me: Sniff,sniff, today we bury the greatest thing of all mankind. Dear, Dragon Quest. May it go on to the afterlife in peace. (Places burned game into coffin) Oh and for Jay (looks at Jay's dead body) Hmmm…I do know a great cliff to throw the body over but it is so much fun burning stuff….decisions, decisions….

OK-DOKEY folks. That was chapter nine. Hoped you enjoyed it or if you didn't I hoped you enjoyed exiting out of it. Thank you for the review KamikazeHikira and to all of you who put up with my fanfic. See ya next time on _Hilly Billy Crime TV_…I mean this fanfic thing.


	10. Chapter 10

I do not own Tales of Legendia. I currently own a secret underground mafia society, though, that is working hard to bring me the guns and money I deserve….OK, really they just bring me candy. ANYWAYS, this is my tenth chapter. YAY! Only ten or so until I can move on from this crappy one review per chapter fanfic! YAY! Sigh, I look back on the chapters I did before and I think: What the freaking muffins is wrong with me? Then I remember I have a small IQ, poor writing etiquette, and a liking for Jay is Michael Jackson jokes (those jokes will never get old! Just stale and kinda boring after the hundredth of so). But I realize another thing, I have super low hits. After chapter one they started decreasing until I have only like 40 hits for chapter 9. SOB! Sorry I added another character! And it's a character that likes Jay the Gay (I had to type that)! SORRY! I'll try to make it better (eventually). But I remember another thing, OH YEAH! My writing sucks THAT is why I have low hits. Or maybe it's because of my attitude problem…I wonder if I'm too hard on myself? Maybe if I develop a positive personality people will like me more! That's it, from here on out I, Dragon Quester, swear to be overly optimistic!

Jay: You suck and everything you do in life will be just as horrible as you are.

….For some odd reason my happy optimistic feeling is gone. Whatever, on with this crummy chapter. Sorry this took so long AGAIN. I went to a dance on Friday and then Saturday I just slept all day and played (what else) Dragon Quest and TOL. Oh no…I shouldn't have typed the word Dragon Quest…suddenly want to play game…must resist…Dragony goodness….ANYWAYS, enjoy this chapter, even though I find that about impossible. I need to learn how to write less random so my story makes more sense. I'm just gonna add a lot of paragraphs…along with making the story look longer it also makes it look all professionally. Here it is: THE TENTHINEAL CHAPTER! (that trumpet music from Dragon Quest plays in the background…is tenthenial even a word?)

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The main deck of Port-On-Rage groaned with the weight from the mass of people shifting around the large dock. Three passenger ships were aligned to the smaller boarding docks that branched from the main one. A disorderly line of people pushed their way out of two of the ships while the ship farthest away from Port-On-Rage's entry sat silently. The sun in the west was slowly descending in the crimson sky, causing people to hurry around even more in fear of having to go out after sunset. Amongst all of the chaos no one noticed a motley group of eight people walk under the marbled archway. And no one noticed one girl turning puke green.

"I…smell…shrimp." Noyem dropped her travel bag and placed her hands around her stomach. "Such a sickening smell." Noyem moaned as she fell onto the wooden boards. She rolled herself up in a tight ball. "I think I'm dying."

"Stop acting like such a fool. Get up," said Jay. He kicked her with the edge of his foot. There was no response from the 'dying' Noyem "Get up," Jay repeated. Noyem just groaned.

"What's wrong with her?" Chloe moved forward to stare at the pity figure of Noyem, still groaning. "Noyams doesn't like seafood or anything that smells like it," informed Quppo/Spot. He was being held on a baby blue leash by Shirley. "Shhhhh, you're not suppose to talk, remember?" whispered Shirley. Quppo/Spot put a paw over his mouth and made the action of zipping something over his mouth. "We're under the disguise as dogs," Pippo/Pochi reminded his brother. Pippo/Pochi's own pink leash was in Senel's hands. "That means no talking, no walking on two legs, and no dignity," grumbled Poppo/Fido, his yellow leash latched onto Jay's suitcase. Chloe meanwhile took the scabbard of her sword and began prodding Noyem with it. "We can't wait for you to get use to the smell forever, Noyem. Hurry up."

"Yeah, Yammy! Even Shirl, who's allergic to seawater, is getting on just fine." Norma dropped all twelve of her bags to knelt down and began poking Noyem with her straw. Still no response from the dying-of-shrimpy-smell girl. "C'mon, girl, we need to get movin." Moses took the back end of one spear and joined Jay, Chloe, and Norma in poking Noyem. Shirley who didn't want to feel left out of the group, took her quill and joined in the poking fest as well. Senel eventually with the Oresoren began poking the hell out of Noyem themselves.

"I…am…so…dying…right…now," mumbled Noyem. She bunched herself into a tighter ball and began rolling away from the evil poking people while groaning sickly at the same time. Civilians and normal people quickly stepped out of Noyem's way. But being a human ball, Noyem was only able to roll around in a circle so she eventually ended up rolling back into the group. "Stop this idiotic behavior at once, all of you." Will grabbed Noyem and stood her up. He brought his fist swiftly onto Noyem's head, creating a hollow 'bonk' sound. "Hey, you already hit me today! Twice isn't fair!" complained Noyem as she rubbed the tender area on her head. She had already a punishment for the pointless kissing booth scandal. But of course since that was bigger and had messed with everyone, that punishment had been much more severe.

_"So this whole time…we could have avoided this whole thing if we just kissed each other on the cheek?" Jay had clenched his fist while Shirley, Norma, and Moses advanced on Noyem, causing her to back up. "Well, I really didn't know, I guess I should have tried that first but…it's the fun that counts right?" At that moment Noyem had backed up into Will. She had looked up and smiled innocently. "I swear I didn't know! I'm not guilty!" Will had brought up his hand but then put it back down. "Fine, we believe you, Noyem." _

_"Really? Ha, gullible losers…wait I didn't mean that! Why are you taking out that hammer? I was only joking…AH!" _

Will moved swiftly through the rest of the group. "It not our fault," murmured Jay as he felt the bump grow on his head. "We were only trying to get her up," insisted Senel. "Although it was a lot of fun to poke her," added Moses. At that comment Will cuffed Moses over the head again. "You're not gonna punish the Scallop Brothers too are you, Teach?" asked Norma as Moses fell to the ground, hands over his seriously injured cranium. The three otters were standing innocently away from the rest of the group, watching them with wide cute we-are-such-good-little-otter-dog eyes. Will went to the otters and was about to bring his hand down until…"Ors!" sang Poppo/Fido. Will sighed and put his hand calmly at his side. "It's not their fault that they were simply influenced by everyone else's foolish conduct." Will took their leashes and led them to the rest of the group while Poppo/Fido mouthed the word: Sucker.

The group went down the wooden ramp that led to the deck close to where the ships were docked. They moved through the thick crowd until they reached the lone ship at the end. The party stood quietly in front of the seemingly empty ship. "Is this our ship, Raynard?" asked Chloe as she examined the small craft closely. "Yes, the _Irreplaceable Beauty _or some other name like that. We have the whole vessel to ourselves." "You mean we will be the only people on it?" asked Shirley. "Yes, we're the only passengers," answered Will.

The ship was small but looked comfortable enough for a small party. The hull was painted a deep red with gold lettering along the starboard side spelling in script _Irreplaceable Beaty_. The true name was what Will had said but the craftsman who had painted the ship had grown lazy and forgotten to add the 'u.' A motor was buzzing sluggishly on the stern and the rigging's sails were flapping against the gentle breeze. The forecastle was a rectangular section along the bow with circular windows along the wall showing each individual cabin and room. The controls were on the surface of the deck in front of the cabin rooms. A burly man was leaning against the wheel, gazing out at sea. When he heard footsteps crossing the gangplank he turned around. "Whacha lot doing on the ship? This is reserved for a prri-vate party!" The man spoke in an accent so thick it was impossible to understand. He was wearing a thin shirt and nondescript grey trousers. Untidy brown hair hung over the sides of his head, covering a dirt smudged face.

"I am Will Raynard. Yesterday I came here to ask about reserving this ship for eight people. I have my pass right here." Will clipped off a piece of paper that had been attached to his suitcase.

The man trudged over to Will and snatched the piece of paper into his grimy hands. "Aye, you be him. And these you group?" The man motioned with his flat greasy head towards Senel, Chloe, Moses, Shirley, Jay, Norma, and Noyem. Will stepped back when the man spoke. His breathe smelled horrible. "Yes, they are. We have the 6pm slot." The man snorted, making the horrid sound of snot be forced back into his nose. "You almost late," he informed, rather pointlessly. "Yes we know that, now can we please get on?" asked Will, exasperated with the man's pointless and illiterate chatter. "Wait here, Sir-re. The ticket you gots says that only eight people be coming on. You gots eleven."

Jay sighed. He could barely stand idiots like Moses, any dumber and he got seriously irritated. "Can't you count? There are only eight of us here now move you blundering fool and let us on!"

"You sure talk big for a short kid," the man snorted again making an even grosser sound than before. "And you sure be dumb too. Counting the furry things, there be eleven in your group." He turned towards Will. "Only dogs come free. Dogs and other anim-els that come on, but don't get off." "They are not our packed lunches if that's what you think," snapped Jay, positioning himself in front of everyone. "Then they don't be coming on," said the man as he folded his arms across his dirty white shirt, acting as if the matter was settled.

"But they are dogs!" exclaimed Noyem suddenly. She pushed her way to the front of the group until she was beside Jay. She took Poppo/Fido's leash from Jay's bag and picked the Oresoren up in her arms. "Then what breed they be?" asked the man advancing so that his face was too close to Noyem. Noyem smiled sweetly. "They are…um...shih tzu!"

"Shits-who?" asked the man stupidly. He took Poppo/Fido's paw in his hands. "You can't fool me with fancy names, sweetie. No dogs has web feet." Noyem took Poppo/Fido's paw back and put a hand protectively over his small fluffy body.

"They are a cross breed. Between shih tzu and...otters."

The man snorted skeptically. "Dogs don't go getting together wiff otters."

"Exactly! And that's why these poor guys are so unlucky! No one can possibly imagine the pain these poor otter/dog hybrids have suffered. Not accepted by either side and not having a place to fit in. Their parents should be ashamed! And even worse, the years of torture have done numbers on these darling babies," Noyem who had talked on dramatically suddenly went on in a whisper. "These guys aren't mentally healthy. You see, we need to take them to the mainland to see a proper caretaker who can handle their needs." At the end of those words Poppo/Fido began foaming at the mouth. "SEE! One of his mental attacks is forming again! Please, kind sir, let us aboard this proud vessel so we can provide the care they so desperately need!"

The man rubbed the grizzled hair at his chin for a moment. "Aye, I understand what tis like, not fitting in. Go on board, pretty little bird, and the rest of ye with ya! Take care of the widdle darlins you have there." The man made an attempt to pat Poppo/Fido on the head. Poppo/Fido growled viciously before the hand even touched a single hair. "Oh thank you! Thank you! May the gods bless your decision, kind sir!" said Noyem earnestly as she elbowed Jay and began walking onto the ship. Everyone followed Noyem in silent disbelief, no one really sure of what they had just witnessed. As Quppo/Spot and Pippo/Pochi passed the man they barked happily. "You take good care of yeselfs!" shouted the man teary eyed as everyone walked towards the forecastle.

"Let's avoid that man at all cost," grumbled Jay as soon at they were out of earshot.

"Agreed," replied everyone.

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"I am so desperately sorry you were questioned, Raynard Sir. I pray that your otter dog mixes haven't become more disturbed mentally be such stress. Quartermaster Rubert is, as I'm sure you experienced, a 'funny' character. I'm afraid you caught him on a bad day of his, he normally doesn't drink all the time." The captain bowed again then flopped himself upward to straightened his red jacket. "However, I hope you enjoy the rest of the voyage. The estimated time of reaching Gadoria is only two days." The white bushy moustache on the captain's face covered his entire mouth. So when he spoke instead of a mouth opening the moustache jumped up and down. "You will be treated with fine dinning for these two days. In fact I will send the cook in with dinner immediately at the current moment. You all must be famished." The captain scurried out of the room leaving Will, Senel, Chloe, Moses, Jay, Norma, Shirley, and Noyem in the crowded dinning room.

"So, Noyem, tell us," started Will staring intently at Noyem once the captain left, "what..." "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT BACK THERE?" finished Norma practically shaking the table with her voice. "You overly sweet talked Ruby Breath and made a lie so complicated I don't even remember what it was in the first place!"

"I had to make up something. What was I suppose to say? 'Excuse me Ugly Freak I need to get on this boat so I can go to Gadoria and drop Princely Pallor over here off at his mum's house. But I have evil little monsters intent on killing me following us around, so if you get involved they'll probably want to kill you too in the most gruesome way possible. Oh, and the little talking otters you see us with are crude, rude, and pissed that I dressed them up as dogs, so they'll probably be a nuisance during the whole trip. That's alright, right?'" Noyem leaned back in her chair. "I'm _sure_ we would have gotten on if I had said _that_."

"But you didn't have to make the lie so elaborate," said Chloe. "Or so idiotic," said Jay.

"Hey, for something I just thought of in my head in two seconds, that lie was good. If I say so myself. It covered everything; the reason why we need the ship, why we're going, and what the mental otters are for." Under the table a mad 'humph' could be heard. Pippo/Pochi, Quppo/Spot, and Poppo/Fido were curled together under the large dinning room table. The captain had even gone as far as taking a cushion and lying it out for the 'sick' otter/shih tzus. Now word was going around the ship (spread by the happily drinking Rubert) that if the otter crossbreeds weren't treated nicely they would die before reaching their 'sanctuary.'

The ornately crafted dinning table took about half of the space in the dinning room. A velvet red carpet covered the floor with matching curtains that draped over windows that lined the wall front of the seated party. The rest of the room was subtlety quite blank. According to the captain the dinning room was the third largest room, second to the bathroom and third to the kitchen. The kitchen was located in the hull and the bathroom was across the forecastle close to the cabins. The dinning room was the first room the party had entered after their encounter with Rubert. There the captain had been pacing in the remaining area the table didn't take up. After greetings, conversation, and a rude interruption by the hairy drunken man the group was finally alone. With Noyem between Moses and Norma on one side of the table. Jay across from Noyem between Senel and Will. And Chloe and Shirley seated at the single sides.

"But you can't go on just creating lies, Noyem. We need to stay low and not draw too much attention to ourselves," said Shirley in her usual caring voice that annoyed Noyem to the point of making evil death stares at the sweet tempered Ferines. "I know that, Blondie. It was just ONE lie. Not like I made false identities for us or something," shrugged Noyem.

"You're quite skilled at the act of lyin', huh?" asked Moses, smiling. "A pretty girl like me has gotta do what she has to do to stay alive," answered Noyem. "So that means that you've made more lies and worse lies before?" Chloe folded her arms across her chest and gave Noyem a disapproving stare. "Hey, I had to protect myself when I was out in the big wilderness all by myself," purred Noyem.

Will cleared his throat, signaling for the conversation to stop. "We need to discuss the matters at hand, not Noyem's multicolored past."

"It's not multicolored! Maybe kind of red and pink with a little bit of purple... but not multicolored!" Noyem snapped.

Will completely ignored her. "I did a thorough examination of the monsters that attacked us. And I discovered a very strange feature about them." Will straightened his glasses and let his gaze sweep over the curious group. "Well, what is it? Are they mutated?" asked Senel.

"No, they were human made," replied Will somberly. "Their bodies were created from remnants of other eren and diva monsters. But their nervous structure was even more intriguing." "Wait, Raynard," began Chloe. "We've fought Frankenstein type monsters before. Doesn't that mean that the monsters that attacked us today are the same type?"

"No, you're forgetting something very important. The Frankenstein erens that have attacked us before weren't man-made. Those creatures were born looking that way but people called then 'Frankenstein' for their appearence. The creatures that attacked us today are the true product of someone," explained Will.

Norma yawned, bored. "Get on with it, Teach. While us, the regular group, can understand. What makes the creepies that attacked us so creepy?"

"The nervous system of the monsters...are modeled after humans," said Will quietly. "EW! You examined the things' _brains_?" shrieked Norma. "You don't understand the studying of living things do you?" sighed Will.

"Ew! You touched brains!" Norma shrieked again. "What did they feel like? Were they squishy or hard like pinkish rocks?" Jay shook his head at Norma's behavior. "We need to get back to the matter at hand. Don't interrupt with your pointless comments." Norma stuck her tongue out at the dark haired boy and let Will take over the conversation again.

"Someone who was so interested in making them that they might have _killed_ to attain the understanding of the human mind to create them," said Will. "So someone killed people just to put brains in those things?" asked Senel disgusted.

"No, the nervous system was a created replica. Different from ours but nearly the same. But as for killing people I don't know if that is the truth. The person who created them may have just had a very, _very _clear understanding of the mind."

"But that is not the most important aspect of the creatures though," said Jay. He closed his eyes in thought. "Their words bothered me the most. Does anyone remember what they said before they attacked us?"

"'We now have orders to kill you,'" quoted Noyem. "That's what one said to me. When I was attacked a few days ago the thing said something about 'orders' too." "That means that those things were created to kill Yammy," exclaimed Norma, putting the information together in her mind.

"Yes, you're right. And I'm guessing that the person who sent those things know about me as well," said Jay. "Why do ya think that?" asked Moses. "Because why else would they be on the Legacy? They couldn't have just gotten here when Noyem arrived. They must have been waiting for her to come so they could attack."

"I still don't see what that has to do with you?" Moses scratched the side of his face, trying to mask his misunderstanding in simple curiosity. "You get dumber each passing day," quipped Jay. "The answer is obvious, someone-"

"Someone knows your Mercy's son and that someone wants me to find you," whispered Noyem. The room went silent and everyone stared at Noyem's quizzically. "But that doesn't make-" began Shirley.

"**DINNER**!"

A jubilant round woman entered the door carrying tray upon tray in her arms. Her smile was brimming from ear to ear as she used her foot to slam the door shut. Her whole body seemed to bounce up and down as she walked towards the table. "**DINNER!**" she yelled, just in case no one had heard her in the small overly crowded almost completely silent room.

Plates took every space within the trays. The nine trays were being carried by four on one whole side of her arm, four more on the other side, and one on her head. When she reached the table she smiled at everyone in turn. "Who's a hungry?" she asked, in an accent sounding faintly like Rubert's. "Here let me help you," offered Chloe as she got up and tried to take a tray from the stout woman. "No, no, I'm fine," said the woman as she swerved her arms away from Chloe. "You just sit down and let Auntie Mabby take care of everything." Auntie Mabby, quicker than any other cook could, laid the plates on the table then left to returned a few seconds later with drinks. "I'll let ye all enjoy your meal," at those words Auntie Mabby closed the door tenderly behind her as she exited the sweet food aroma filled dinner room.

"Look at all this food," drooled Moses as he began reaching for a saliva tingling, mouth watering, slab of meat. Before Moses' hands touched the plate, Jay snatched it up and began eating. "Give that back, Shorty!" yelled Moses. "Don'th callth meth shorth," spat Jay, spewing chunks of meat in Moses' face. "There's more than just that one piece," said Senel as he passed a plate to Moses. Moses practically jumped on the plate. "Good, I'm so hungry I could eat Jay's ponytail!"

Jay made a sound that either sounded like an elephant farting or a 'hmph' sound as he took another bite. "Wait, there's nothing on here, Senel. It's empty!" Moses turned the plate upside down and let the crumbs fall on the floor. "Oops," said Senel simply as he put a bare drumstick down next to three other licked clean slabs. "HEY! Gimme one if ya have any left." Moses reached along the table and tried to take Senel's plate. Senel lifted his plate up and continued eating. "Sharing is a symbol of FRIENDSHIP, Senel. GIVE ME MEAT!" Moses got up and snatched the drumstick that Senel had tried to stuff hurriedly into his mouth. "Ha! I win again!" cheered Moses as he held the stolen food in his hands. "Like hell!" growled Senel as he took a fork and threw it at Moses' hand. Moses knocked the flying fork out of the way and was about to bite down into the drumstick until Senel grabbed the other side and began pulling it back towards himself.

"Settle down, you'll knock over my salad." Will lifted his fruit bowl and as Senel entered a tug of war with Moses over the meat. "You're just eating a salad?" asked Chloe. "Yes, I have to watch my health," said Will with a stiff attitude. Then he added solemnly. "There's nothing unmanly about eating a salad."

"I-I didn't say that," stammered Chloe. "The truth is that Harriet is forcing me to. Since salads are the only things she makes semi-right. Now, my whole diet is salad," mumbled Will.

"GIMME THE MEAT, SENEL!"

"NEVER!"

"What are you eating, Yammy?" asked Norma. "Eight peepit wings, fifty butter rolls, nineteen apple pastries...and whatever this is." Noyem held up a strange mass of what looked like mashed potatoes (but green) and stuffed it in her mouth.

"Geez! Do you normally eat like that?"

"Like what?" replied Noyem, green glop dripping out of her mouth.

"A pig."

"Yup." Noyem took two of the peepit wings and shoved them in her mouth. "How do you stay so thin eating ninety-nine pounds of food each meal?" Norma put down her fork she was using to eat spaghetti with and put her hands together like she was praying. "Please tell me your secrets, Oh Wise One!"

Jay made the elephant fart sound again.

Noyem and Norma ignored Jay's remark. "My secret, Young Grasshopper, is that I don't put the pounds in my gut." Noyem pointed to her chest. "I put them in my boobs." Norma looked at Noyem in utter fascination. "REALLY?" Noyem nodded. "Yup, if I eat exactly fifty more pounds I'm moving up to a size double D cup!"

"LET GO OF IT, MOSES!"

"IT'S MINE!"

"Shirley are you okay? You've been quiet for awhile," said Chloe with sincere concern in her voice. Shirley had to yell a bit to be heard across the table. "I'm fine. Just enjoying everyone's company." Shirley raised a spoon and began sipping her soup daintily.

"Are you sure? I mean if you want to talk about Sen- I mean what happened earlier today I-"

"I said I'm fine, Chloe," said Shirley almost venomously.

"GIVE UP! YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO WIN, SENEL!"

"SHUT UP, MOSES!"

"Isn't it nice to be eating together?" sighed Jay. The Oresoren, who had stayed quiet during the whole dinner (they had been fed earlier), replied in a happy 'ors' while one could be heard saying: "Screw this."

"DIE A SPORK DEATH, SENEL!" screamed Moses as he took a spork and began preparing himself to defend until death for the drumstick.

"YOU ARE THE ONE WHO WILL DIE!"

"I feel like we were discussing something important earlier..." drawled Noyem. "I think I forgot what it was by the thirtieth butter roll."

"We'll have plenty of time to talk about important matters later," said Will. He pushed back his salad bowl away and focused his attention on Senel and Moses who were dueling with sporks over the table. He calmly reached his hand in and nabbed the drumstick. "Finally, real food," sighed Will dreamily as he began eating. Moses and Senel looked at Will dumbstruck.

"That was mine..." both said at the same exact time.

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Jay tapped his pencil irritably against his notebook. He bit his lip in frustration as he stared at the blank page in front of him. Usually writing came easy to him, being an information dealer he had written letters to people before. But the particular information he was putting down on the paper wasn't going to just anyone. It was going to his mother.

_"I feel like an idiot for doing this," _thought Jay as he wrote: _Ideas for What to Say _across the top. He pressed the sharpened tip of the pencil on the first line. He began to tap the pencil again. Words weren't forming naturally into his mind for some reason. _"Maybe if I should start with information about what I know about..." _trailed Jay as he began to form the first word of his paper.

"Whacha doin?" asked a highly annoying voice. Jay cringed and quickly covered his paper with his hands. "Nothing, Moses. Go away."

"I can't go away, Jay! We're bunkin' together. Remember?" Moses smiled and pulled Jay off the bed he had been sitting on. There were two double beds along the length of each room. Next to each bed was a small table with an oil lamp nailed to the surface. Hanging in the middle of the back wall was a uninteresting, dull picture of a sailboat. Already Moses bed, across from Jay's, was covered in clothes,(_why did Moses pack clothes? He never wears them.) _junk, pictures, random objects, and whatever else Moses had decided to bring. Jay's area was much more tidier. There was only one crease that showed that he had been sitting on it and on the end lied a snoring Quppo/Fido.

"Why, of all people, did I have to be in the same room with you," mumbled Jay, mostly to himself. Will had been the one who decided all of the room arrangements after dinner. Chloe and Shirley in the room closest to the dinning room. Down one from them Will and Senel. Across from that room was Norma and Noyem leaving Jay with Moses in the room across from Shirley's. The otters roamed from room to room.

"Cuz we're brothers!" said Moses happily, putting an arm around Jay's shoulder. "Don't touch me," snapped Jay. Moses didn't bother to take his arm off Jay instead he just smiled like a cheeky salesman. "Now why would you say something so mean, Jay? Especially when I am about to give you the best offer of your life."

Jay pushed Moses' arm off him. "What are you talking about?"

Moses shook his head sadly and made the tutting sound. "Do you know where I just went?"

"No and I don't care."

"To the bathroom."

"Why the hell do you think I care about you going to the bathroom?" asked Jay completely repulsed.

"No! I'm talking about the room with the giant bathtub in it!"

"The bathing room. What about it? The girls are using it first so you can't go in."

Moses' smiled widened evilly. His voice dropped down to a whisper. "Exactly! I checked and the girls are getting ready for a soak. You know what that means, right?"

Jay shook his head slowly. "No."

"You are dumb for a smart guy," said Moses as looked over at the sleeping otter and brought his voice down lower. "We're going spyin!"

"On whom?" asked Jay, genuinely confused. Moses slapped his palm against his forehead. "Do I have to spell it out! We are gonna go peep on the girls!"

Instantly a wall of thoughts slammed into Jay's skull. _"WHAT! How, why, who...SHIRLEY...not right, wrong...SHIRLEY...illegal, we'll get killed...SHIRLEY...but immortal soul...SHIRLEY..." _Jay processed the information slowly in his head. "Moses, how...what?"

"We'll ask Senel to join us so don't worry about it," said Moses not noticing Jay's mental stress. "Just keep it low under Will. If he finds out, we're all dead. And if the girls find out, we're more than dead."

Jay looked dumbly at Moses. "What?" he asked again. "C'mon we don't have a lot of time. I think I hear the girls runnin down the hall," urged Moses. In the hallway fast footsteps could be heard along with someone giggling. Moses put a hand to his lip and sneaked towards the door. He pushed it open.

"What do you think you're doing, Red! Close that door NOW!" It was Norma. She had been running up the hall to pick up Chloe and Shirley. All three girls were wearing nothing but towels. "Sorry!" apologized Moses as he slammed the door shut.

He smiled gleefully back at Jay. "See? Let's go get Senel and follow after them!" Moses stopped talking for a second then raised an eyebrow. "Unless...you'd rather stay here, miss all the action, and write in your little notebook?"

_"Was that, SHIRLEY?" _"Not at all, let's go," replied Jay without a second's hesitation.

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"In times like this I miss Grune."

"How did I end up here?"

"Shut up, they'll hear us."

Moses, Senel, and Jay were crowded together, lying against the floor of the hallway in front of the bathing room. Being that it was a bathing room, the large sliding door had wide slots beneath the frame for steam to escape. That was also great for peeping toms to look under. Moses was against the left side of the wall, Senel in the middle, and Jay pressed against the right wall. "This is wrong," said Senel.

"Yeah, yeah, I know that already. You said so about five times earlier," answered Moses as he waved Senel's comment away as if it were nothing more than an annoying fly.

"I don't even know why I'm here," Senel mumbled. "Naked girls; why would you need anymore of a reason?" stated Moses like that was the most common knowledge in the world. "No, you dragged him here," corrected Jay.

"Yeah, I did. Only cause he was takin' so long on deciding," said Moses.

"You're lucky Will was napping when you barged in. He wouldn't hesitate to kill us if he found out what we were doing." Senel began getting up. "I'm leaving before I'm found out or-"

"LOOK! Some are starting to take off the towels!" whispered Moses urgently as he flattened himself to try and gain a better look. Senel fell back down and stuck his face beneath the slot as he asked, "Really?" Jay shook his head sadly. _"Mindless fools...I'm the only one who's going to actually leave and-" _

"Look, there's Shirley," said Moses.

"WhERe?" screamed/whispered Jay, thoughts of leaving completely vanished from his head.

"Next to Chloe, they're in the water, though, so you can't see anything," whispered Senel. "And the damn steam is in all the right places (darn this teen rated fanfic)," mumbled Moses. Moses moved his head slightly, looking like a deformed bloodhound as his head moved along the ground, to try and look at another area. "AH-HA! Over there sitting under the shower thingys! Noyem and Norma!" "But why are they there?" Senel asked. "We were told the showers were broken so they can't use them. And why does Noyem have her towel so high?" Jay covered Senel's mouth with a sleeve. "Be quiet. We might be able to listen in on what they're saying."

The bathing room had a very simple structure. A large bath in the middle, two smaller baths along the right wall and showers along the left. Noyem and Norma were sitting on stools close to the door and Chloe and Shirley were standing in the bath area closest to where the peeping toms watched. The boys were able to hear everything that was being said.

"Why don't you want to come in, Yammy?" Norma was laying a hand on Noyem's shoulder. "If you got anything embarrassing like hairy legs it's okay. We won't make fun or you." "It's not that," said Noyem softly. She tightened the towel around her neck, covering her chest. "It's..."

Norma rolled her eyes. "You think we're intimidated by _those_? Yammy, they're big and all but I knew someone who had bigger." Norma slapped Noyem on the back. "Either get in the water or I'll push you in!"

"The water's perfect too! I added some herbs that will relieve stress in it so it's really peaceful." Shirley gave another of her angelic smiles. "If you can't swim, don't be afraid," said Chloe (_looks who's talking_) "The water's not that high." "Just get in!" Norma tried to yank the towel off Noyem. Noyem held on tight to the ends but Norma was able to loosen Noyem's grip. The towel fell down slightly, showing some of her skin above the breastbone.

Horribly, horribly, scarred skin.

"Yes! Finally! Noyem...What happened to her?" Moses had been grinning like the pervert he can be when he saw Norma try to grab Noyem's towel. But it wasn't what Moses had expected or wanted to see. Senel winced at the sight of the scar tissue. "What could have done-"

"She was cut, cut by a blade. But the injury looks old, it must have happened to her a long time ago." Jay turned away. He knew what a knife accident could do the skin. He knew what an intended cut could do to the skin. Jay was able to recognize a cut that had meant to kill. _"That scar...it looks exactly like-" _

"Yammy, sorry, I didn't know," apologized Norma quickly as she backed away. Noyem quickly covered herself again, her face downcast. "What happened?" asked Chloe softly. Shirley began walking over. "It doesn't look like anything a curing spell can't-"

"NO." Noyem wrapped the towel around herself as she brought her legs up to the stool. "It...can't be healed. Please, don't ask about it." "I only want to help," stated Shirley. "You, can't. Sorry." Noyem got up and began walking away. "I'm going over here if you guys don't want to-"

"AACCHOO!" sneezed Moses (he sneezes at the most random times).

"What was that?" asked Norma suddenly forgetting about Noyem's scar. "Must be someone out in the hall," said Chloe. "Do you think someone is spying on us?" Shirley sank into the bath, only her blonde hair and ears sticking out over the water. "If a perv is out there you will have to face ME," Norma declared holding a soap bar out like a sword. "This room is almost made like it was for peeping," added Noyem as she looked around the room, her hands still holding desperately to her towel .

"YOU IDIOT!" whisper/screamed Jay and Senel. Moses ran a finger along his nose. "What? It's not my fault. I think I'm allergic to Jay's shampoo." "You completely blew our cover!" whispered Senel furiously. "I knew doing this was wrong! It's all your fault, Moses." "And that sneeze was loud enough for Will to hear it," Jay whispered. "If he comes and finds out we're-"

"You're what, Jay?" asked an overshadowing presence above the boys. The turned their heads up to see Will standing over them like a predatory hawk about to swoop down and kills it prey in the most graphic way possible. Jay's raked his head for a lie to use quickly. _"Something, anything..."_

"We're looking for mice..." he began slowly.

"Boobies," finished Moses simply.

"Mice boobies?" Will raised one eyebrow skeptically. Will looked pass them and noticed the bathing room door. His already evil expression darkened. "You're all spying on the girls aren't you." He said it as a statement, not a question.

"NO!"

"Yeah."

Will took Moses' head in his left hand and Jay's head in his right. He held their heads motionlessly for awhile. "Teenaged peeping is wrong boys, very wrong." At those words, Will took Jay and Moses' face and slammed them into the wall. Senel watched his two partners in crime land unconsciously on the floor, blood pouring out of their mouths. Senel smiled up at Will. "I get away free right, good friend?" he asked sweetly. Will took his fist and slammed it into the back of Senel's skull. "No, you don't, Senel." Will smiled as Senel got stuck in the head sized crater that he had created from being thrown at the door with such a force it would make a hurricane cry in self-pity.

"Did anyone hear something that sounded like a 'thwack'?" asked a soft voice inside the bathing room.

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Noyem dried her hair off with a hand towel. The room she and Norma shared still had the scent of citrus shampoo in the air. Noyem threw the towel on her bed and flopped down after it. _"Finally a REAL bed." _Noyem buried her head in the comforter. _"So much better than the cot..." _Noyem's eyes flashed open as the next thought entered her mind. _"...but it's not the same without Jay's snoring in the background." _Noyem squeezed her eyes shut. _"NO! I need to stop having lovey-dovey thoughts like that. It's wrong and disturbing." _She turned over on her back. _"I don't even know why I'm falling for the freak anyway, he's nothing to me...nothing but a hot, sexy...AHHH! Holy duckernuts (wait...where did duckernuts come from?) I need to stop thinking like that!" _Noyem took her mirror off the bedside table and began hitting it against her forehead. _"Perverted thoughts bad for Yammy, perverted thoughts bad for Yammy! Perverted thoughts bad for Yammy! Perverted thoughts bad for-" _

"What's up, Yammy?"

"AHHH!" Noyem fell back against the wall, bonking her head. "Don't sneak up on me like that!" she practically screamed while Norma sat down beside her. Their cabin was identical to the ones before it, but with a dull, uninteresting picture of the sea hanging on the wall. Norma took the mirror from Noyem's hands and held it up to the light. "Weird beauty thing you were doing back there. Wait, don't tell me I know; hitting your head against a mirror gives you flawless skin?" "No, it gives you perfect hair," said Noyem sarcastically. She put her legs under her and sat leaning against the wall. "That was one long bathroom trip you took, ADD-Girl," said Noyem, using the nickname she sometimes referred to as Norma.

"I wasn't going to the bathroom." Norma smiled mischievously. "You were making out with your boyfriend? Shirtless-Wonder?" asked Noyem returning the smile. "EW! No, but I was doing something like that." "Making out with Jay? Senel? Oldie?" "No! I walked by the bathing room and guess what I saw!" But Norma didn't wait for Noyem to reply. "I saw the boys, just Senny, JJ, and Red, in there! And they were-"

"Making out?"

"NAKED!" shrieked Norma.

"Oh, that, already knew it," said Noyem uninterested. Norma looked at her shocked. "You aren't interested in that? Yammy, you, the Queen of All Things Men Related, not interested in THAT?" "Well...you see, Norma, I have already seen the splendor." "Huh?" Norma let her mouth hang open in confusion. "I saw them when they were undressing when I left earlier." Noyem talked calmly, as if discussing the weather, not the thing every teenaged girl was interested in. "But I thought you said you were leaving to get a snack! And then you did return with a snack."

"I sent Fluffy out to get my food then had him deliver it to me where I was sitting watching the show."

"You are so evil, Yammy."

"Yeah, I know...wanna go spy on them again?"

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"Okay, girls, welcome to MenFest!"

"Take a chip from the otter/dog waiter then please move on to sit in your pre-selected area."

"Norma, Noyem, why did you take us here? We've already bathed," said Chloe as she took a chip from Pippo/Pochi who was elegantly holding a tray with caviar covered delicacies. The girls were in front of the bathing room but it had been completely transformed. The floor was covered in pillows and banners with the words MEN! were sprawled along the walls. Pippo/Pochi was dressed in a fancy butler uniform in front of the whole scene.

"And what's with MenFest, Norma?" asked Shirley. Noyem pushed the blonde girl on a cushion laid out on the floor. "Stop talking and look under the gaping hole in the door." "That's for steam to escape through so the room won't get too hot," informed Shirley. "Yeah, sure," replied Noyem, not paying attention to what Shirley had said, "and it's for our entertainment purposes."

Chloe was the fist to understand what was going on. "Noyem! Norma! You only brought us here to spy on the men taking their baths! That is the lowest of the low! The worst sin against privacy! How can you two live with yourself?" Chloe voice was full of disgust but almost forced disgust.

"How can we live with ourselves? By not letting a sweet opportunity like this pass us! You know you want to take a look at your Tall, Hot, Sweetie in there," teased Noyem. "And also haven't you ever wondered what Senny is like under the marine outfit? Don't you want to know what he's made of?" Norma tilted her head innocently.

"Of course I want to, but finding out what Coolidge is like this way is wrong..."

"Then how do you want to find out, Chloe?" asked Shirley, her ice blue eyes turning into twin evil daggers. "I didn't mean it like that!" spurted Chloe.

"Hey, buddies, the show is starting. Sit or miss out on all the bliss." Noyem sang the last part as she pushed Chloe down on the cushion beside Shirley. Shirley looked under the door then added nervously, "Hey, what if they hear us? What will happen?"

"We'll run in there and then wait for what happens next," answered Noyem seriously. "This is horribly ill-planned," said Chloe as she bit the sides of her cheeks in nervousness. "That's what makes it so much fun, now quiet so we can enjoy," whispered Norma.

Noyem laid out on the pillow in front of her, trying to control a dumb grin. Her dumb grin finally broke when she saw Jay (hey if you are expecting a description go to some other fanfic. If I dare try to write one my eyes will bleed and my soul will die, again). _"Jay's not that bad looking. In fact I would consider him...NO! Stop, bad Yammy! I have seen guys with much more jaw dropping features! Jay is completely normal... must look at the other hot men." _

Norma yawned. "Such a boring selection. With Red it's like 'already seen it.' With Senny it's almost the same thing. JJ's the only one who looks actually different. He's always dressed up in that creepy carnival outfit so you never really get to see anything."

"Yeah...and the damn steam blocks all the good parts ( I feel like I've typed that before)!" complained Chloe. Shirley and Norma looked at Chloe cautiously. Their usual respectable friend would NEVER say anything like that! "Um, I mean it's interesting where the steam is, um, put," corrected Chloe.

"CANNON BALL!"

The scream interrupted the girls as the form of Moses jumped up into the air and landed with a tidal wave splash in the bathing pool. "You wasted about half of the water you idiot!" Jay had been washing his hair at the end of the pool. After Moses' high jump, Jay's dark hair was hanging over his face, making him look like a brother to the girl from _The Ring._ "The water's too shallow to jump in. You could have killed yourself, Moses," Senel said as he reached for the soap bar stand beside the bath. "Much to my disappointment, you're still breathing," commented Jay as he began parting his hair away from his face. "Aw, you sissies don't know how to have a good time," said Moses. He took the eye patch off his face and laid it on the tiled floor. Moses shook his shaggy pink hair and dived into the water. He popped back up. "OK, all done," announced Moses as he crawled out then grabbed a towel off the rack.

"I knew it, you're so barbaric you never bother cleaning yourself thoroughly," said Jay.

"That's just cuz I don't spend five hours applyin' fancy girly shampoos to my hair."

Jay turned around so that he could talk face to face with Moses. "At least my hair is considered hair. Yours is some form of dead animal you put on your head." With Jay's turned around Noyem could make out something along Jay's pale back. A long, worn scar like the scratch of an animal ran from the neck to the middle of the spine.

Noyem felt her skin burn. "Sorry but I got to leave now," said Noyem as she sat up and walked past the sitting girls and otter butler. "What's the matter, Noyem? Don't tell me you don't want to stay any longer." Shirley pulled her face away from the door and tried to study Noyem's suddenly distressed behavior. "Yeah! The steam might clear at any minute. Wouldn't want to miss that!" added Norma who wasn't even bothering to bring her head up. "I'm just tired is all. I'll be in the room if you need me," cut Noyem curtly as she walked down the hall to her room. She opened the door and slammed it behind her breathing in and out deeply.

She put a hand to her chest and felt her own hideous scars. _"How could he have a scar like that? He's been healed with eres before it makes no sense...He must have been attacked by someone like..." _Noyem rubbed a jagged scar under her collarbone and thought deeply. _"But how could Jay have met...how could Jay have been attacked by him? Unless maybe it was an accident." _Noyem closed her eyes as she felt tears welling on the edges of the memory. _"I was the only mistake. I didn't die when he tried to kill me, that is the only mistake he has ever made. I'm the only one Jare didn't kill." _

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AFTERWORD: Tenthenial DONE! Ah, I spent so much time on it and it still...sucks! (insert scream here) Must learn how to write better before I try to write anything else. I need to buy Writing for Dummies or Writing for Dummies Written By Dummies or something similar to those. The bathing room parts were so hard to write! For the guy parts I felt like just writing CENSORED in every sentence instead I just hid behind the steam excuse. I think I need to purify myself with holy water after writing this...but holy water burns me. ANYWAYS, since it is the tenth chapter I should add something special!

Jay: Announce that you FINALLY quit!

Me: NO! You forget, MJ Jr., that I am so beyond self pity for myself and every action pit against me makes me laugh! HA!

Jay:...I didn't understand half of what you just said.

Me: Yeah me neither. (teardrop) ANYWAYS, it's almost to the part where you meet your momma!

Jay: Oh great (horribly done sarcasm).

Me: Your mother is...(drum roll here) DARTH VADER!

Jay: (sighs) And my father's Chewbacca isn't he?

Me: To you he's Papa Chewy.

Well who cares about Jay's parents! This is the tenth chapter time to add some serious non-serious only half laugh out loud extras! Here it is: a shorty scene that probably only a few of you 40 will get.

It's All in the Ponytail

Moses: Yo! (high fives a random guy, looks closely at the guy's fingers) HAHA! Bigger again (goes up to another random guy, looks closely at his fingers ) I win again!

Chloe (watching from far away): What in the world is Sandor doing? He's acting stranger than usual and why he is only going towards men?

Noyem: (Sigh) You really don't understand men do you? A man's middle finger is as long as his Flappy Pappy, and it makes men feel better when they know theirs is bigger.

Shirley: Flappy Pappy?

Noyem: You know like a Straight and Long Ding-Dong.

Chloe: Straight and Long Ding-Dong?

Noyem: A limp rabbit! Baseball bat and accessories! An evil pencil! Does anyone get this?

Norma: I get what you're talking about Yammy.

Noyem: Finally someone, I think you're probably the smartest of the group Norma.

Norma: I know, I know. Anyway Red is moving to JJ next. I kinda feel for him. He's so short and his hands are so small Red's stupid contest will probably tear his small pride apart.

Noyem: I don' think you should judge Jay-Boy from the hands...I'm guessing a better scale would be the ponytail.

Norma: Ponytail? Ok let's see (takes out ruler and holds it to Jay's ponytail).

Jay: What the hell are you doing?

Norma: Ohmigod! It's seven inches long!

Noyem: That's is one long Straight and Long Ding-Dong.

So random! I got that idea cuz every guy in school was doing it and it was getting SO annoying. ANYWAYS, that was chapter ten! Took almost TWO weeks to write. Sorry! Thanks for the review C-Chan and anyone else who reads this! Muhahahaha, more mysteries come! What do the men look like without the steam? Oh...and what's with the scars. Well, if you remember a Jare was mentioned like once before. Yes...a name as menacingy as Jared's from Subway. Also I think I made it sound like Jay's name too much. But maybe Jare isn't really this guy's name. (OOOHHHH! And nobody guess Solon cuz it's not). Well, everything might piece together at some point! ANYWAYS! That's all for now. And remember kiddies, only you can start forest fires! I mean...stop forest fires.


	11. Chapter 11

I do not own Tales of Legendia. But thanks to random stock increases I now own HALF THE WORLD...or I did until someone realized that my stock papers were made out of licorice. Stock market is a harsh world...ANYWAYS, (gets down on hands and knees and cries horribly) I AM SO SORRRYY! This chapter has taken like more than TWO WEEKS to write! Well I did finish the tenth chapter so I kinda deserved a mini vacation (of hell: school). But then I got sick (again) and couldn't move for like five days. And then I...uh...kinda forgot all about Hey, I forget stuff that doesn't try to kill me (aka school and friends). ANYWAYS, I am so sorry everyone! I'll try to balance my time better but hey! Think of this like a new season of a crappy comedy! New seasons take like weeks to come out! And when they come out they're always better! That's like the same thing here! New season, longer time coming out...just not really any better though (wah). ANYWAYS, this chapter is crammed with stuff! So much stuff, junk, and poofiness that you will probably be better off exiting from the site right now. Also unlike crappy comedies this is the chapter before everything starts getting serious (and in a really mysterious way! dun dun dun) ANYWAYS, so sorry, all forty or so of you, who have been kind enough into making me believe that people actually read this, here is chapter eleven.

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Noyem reached out with her arm to block another hit. No good. Another jab went for her left side. She leaned to the right to try and avoid it but only ended up being taken by the arm and shoved on the ground. She tried to resist by using her legs to sweep and trip her opponent but she was too late. Noyem fell to the forecastle deck with a small 'thump.' She wiped the dirt the wooden boards had accumulated over the years of poor cleaning off her face and pushed herself up. Jay watched her with a large smirk. "Wipe that grin off your face. I haven't even begun to fight." Noyem pulled light auburn strands of hair out of her eyes to see better. She was panting heavily, this was her fifth loss in a row.

"Are you sure you don't want to quit?" Jay asked, absentmindedly adjusting his side ponytail. "You haven't even hit me once. You should have picked Chloe or Norma to train with. I'm just too past your level." Jay put his hands in his pockets and took out his dagger. The hotate blade shone off its luster in the early morning sun. "It's a good thing we're not using weapons, if we were you'd be dead by now."

"Oh, shut up, NoseJob (another MJ reference). I'm not just up to speed yet." Without another word Noyem charged at Jay. He sighed and simply cut off by taking the back of her head, stepping behind her, and pushing her to the ground while at the same time polishing the hotate with the end of his shirt. "DAMMIT! Stop being so weird with the inhuman senses!" shouted Noyem, getting another mouthful of dirt.

Jay shrugged his shoulders. "Sorry, it was a reflex." He put away his blade and offered his hand to pull her up. "I'll try to be slower this time."

Noyem shoved his hand away and stood up. "Don't go easy on me just because I've let you won so far." Noyem sounded tough but in her mind she was mentally punishing herself. _"WHY DIDN'T I TAKE THE HAND! Perfect chance just went POOFY! Outta here, never seen again! Jay Boy will probably never offer his hand like that again! I'll never get past first base with him! Hell, I'll never get to the freaking ballpark parking lot with him!"_

"So, the two lovebirds get some time alone. So sweet, so innocent, but to be pushed away by the cruel hand of shame!" Norma walked up the stairs to the deck while talking in her romance novel voice. "They meet in secret under the superstition of their roommates! But who can stop their ever beating hearts?"

"If you're so good at sprouting literature, Norma, go teach Moses proper English," huffed Jay. "Noyem and I are just training so don't get any ideas." Norma's eyes shot open wider and she put a hand to her mouth. "Ohmigod, you two have moved to the next level of your relationship already? You know what they say, after training comes marriage!" Noyem stuck her hand near her mouth and pretended to be throwing up. "Ew, I haven't even eaten breakfast and then you say something so disgusting. I think I lost my appetite, for life."

Jay rolled his eyes. "Believe me that makes me just as sick as well." "Don't let me spoil all of your fun," said Norma as she sat on a barrel next to the stairs. "Please continue your romantic brawling." Jay simply stood his ground while Noyem leaned her weight on her right side. She wanted to try and trick Jay so she could quickly switch sides and go for an area he wasn't guarding well. She put her own hands in the air, leaving herself completely open. "You go ahead and attack first, Pale-O."

Jay didn't even reply as he dashed straight forward. Noyem was ready to throw his weight off to one side as he came closer. She was about to make her move until Jay grabbed her hand, turned her around, and pushed her to the ground again. "Give up, now?" Jay asked, watching Noyem get dirt stuck to her face, again. Noyem balled her fist and punched the boards beneath her in frustration. "Why won't you just stand still for at least TWO SECONDS! And why do you have to SHOVE ME ON THE FREAKIN GROUND EVERY SINGLE TIME!"

"That's the whole point, to knock your opponent over so you can finish them quickly," informed Jay, trying to sound as modest as a smart ass can get. "Don't tell me your _experience_ hasn't taught you that."

Noyem sat up, spitting a clump of dust that had gotten into her mouth out. "My experience could kick your experience's butt anytime, anywhere." "Then why haven't you won a single match yet?" asked Jay innocently. Noyem was about to reply then stopped. _"Because I was talking about a different type of experience..." _

"Well, JJ is really good at stuff. What was it you use to say?" Norma mimicked Jay's voice in a high pitched tone. "'I can't it stand it when I don't know if someone is better than me or not. So I must simply find out so I do know. You know?'"

"Why are you even here, Norma?" sighed Jay. Norma hopped off the barrel and put her hands on her hips. "I was just worried about Yammy. She wasn't there when I woke up and then I checked Red's room and you weren't there so the first conclusion that went into my mind was: OHMIGOD they must be passionately making out somewhere!" While speaking Norma put her hand over heart, talking as if she were stating the most romantic words in the world. Jay sighed again, highly, HIGHLY annoyed. "Go away before I decide to kill you," Jay said then began walking towards the stairs.

"Get back here, MJ fan-freak." Noyem was back on her feet, panting even harder. "I'm not done yet." "You look done," said Jay. "I haven't even used half of my strength!" Noyem took large gulps of air and tried to ease her exhausting pant. "I'm not even tired."

"Looking at you like that almost makes me feel bad for you," shrugged Jay. "But if you want to train one last round then fine." Norma hitched herself back on the barrel and watched the two preparing themselves for another match. "You come at me again this time," said Noyem. "Whatever you say," said Jay almost sympathetically. "You're still going to lose."

"Shut up and come at me you **short **little freak of nature!"

Everyone knows Jay's **short** boiling point. Everyone knows how Jay acts when someone hits his **short **boiling point. Sometimes just thinking the word **short** can send Jay's **short** evil stares your way. And when you say the dreaded word **short** it doesn't matter what other words you said before it, all that matters is the word **short**. And you know once you say it you're soon to be **short** on life.

Jay rushed to Noyem even faster than he had before and only the little unconscious voice in his head stopped him from taking out his dagger and stabbing her to death. He flitted from left to right to try confuse Noyem before knocking her down and ending all of her **short** remarks. Noyem kept a trained eye on the swift moving Jay. She didn't think of what to do next she just meekly watched him and let her intuition take over. Noyem noticed how Jay seemed to favor the left side and let that small fact melt into her memory. When Jay was close enough and was about to knock her down again Noyem took his shoulder and wrapped her left leg around Jay's to trip him over. She took Jay by both shoulders and smacked him face down onto the dirty deck's boards.

"SCORE! I win this round, MJ Loser! I told you I was pretty tough didn't I but nooo, you didn't believe me! Well now you're eating dirt, HA!" Noyem was so enthralled at having won a match at last she didn't notice exactly where she was. She took Jay's hotate and held it mockingly in front of Jay. "I wonder if I should teach you a lesson once and for all and cut off your ponytail." "Don't even think of it AND GET OFF OF ME!" screamed Jay. "What are you talking-" said Noyem before Norma interrupted her by cutting the morning air with her piercing laughter.

"Yammy, do you normally attack guys like that?" Norma said between bursts of laughter.

"What are you talking about?" finished Noyem. She looked down at Jay and then finally realized what was going on.

Noyem was on top of Jay like a child would with a pony. Or to put it in worst terms she was on top of Jay like someone would if they're BLEEP and trying to BLEEP and taking their BLEEP and BLEEP and also use it to BLEEP then BLEEP and finally BLLEEEPPP (censoring provided by the 'We Don't Want our Kids to Find the BLEEPING Truth about BLEEP Society)

"AHHH!" Noyem jumped off Jay's back that she had earlier been straddling. "Didn't mean to do that! Seriously didn't mean to do that!" Noyem threw Jay's blade to the ground and brushed off her clothing like they were contaminated. "I can't believe I did that." _"I can't believe I didn't realize I was doing that...I could have stayed on longer!" _

Jay pushed himself off the ground and quickly placed his hotate back in his pocket. "Remind me to never train with you again." He brushed his own clothes off and began going down the stairs without giving Norma or Noyem another glance. "Well, well, Yammy," began Norma. "It looks like you and your little boyfriend have some issues to work out."

"If you call him my boyfriend, lover, or even just acquaintance one more time I will scream." Noyem watched Jay enter the dinning room entry and creak open the door. It was barely past seven am and even the ship's crew were still asleep. Noyem yawned, waking up at five to get Jay had cut her beauty sleep in half. "Let's go see if Mabby is up, ADD. I want a banana muffin."

Norma was about to reply but her stomach growled over whatever she was about to say. "Yeah, last night's dinner hardly filled me up. I'm sure Aunt Mab will feed us if we ask. You know I just found out that she is Ruby Breath's _wife." _"They do sound alike," said Noyem, thinking back to the couple's bizarre accents. "But what is weirder is that Red told me. Don't ask me how he knows," added Norma.

"What are you youn'gns doin up there? Come on down so ye can get your breakfast!" shouted a bubbly and too loud for the calm morning voice. Norma and Noyem peered below the deck to see Auntie Mabby herself brimming with her usual too happy smile. She had a basket full of freshly baked muffins and pancakes piping with warm butter.

"We'll be right down, Mab!" answered Norma. She and Noyem hurried down the wooden stairs and greeted the plump middle aged woman. "The captain wishes to speak wiff all of ye too," said Auntie Mabby as Norma and Noyem began dividing their share of muffins. "I think the ship's about to reach Gadoria this evenin."

"Really? Then let's go wake everyone up then, Yammy." Scooping up another five muffins Norma stuffed them into her mouth and ran into the cabins. Noyem took her own share of muffins (nine) and chased after her.

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"GIVE ME THAT HASHBROWN, SENEL!"

Moses reached across the table to try and yank the golden meat and potato dish out of Senel's hands. Senel yanked his plate away and leaned back to try and avoid Moses' greedy hands. "IN YOUR DREAMS, MOSES!"

"Musth thoseth twoth fightth overth foodth everyth mealth?" sighed Jay, his own mouth full of pancake. "Must you talk while eating, Jay? You're getting pancake on my morning salad," complained Will as he flicked a piece of chewed pancake away with the end of his fork. "Shirley, can you pass me the syrup?" asked Chloe. "Umm, I think Noyem is using it," Shirley answered. She pointed towards Noyem, who was pouring the syrup straight out of the canister and into her mouth. "Ew, Yammy, that is so gross. Use a napkin or something." Norma tried to scoot away from the waterfall of syrup but Moses' leg was in the way. Moses was standing on his chair and using his trusty spork from last night to stab the hashbrown away from Senel's mouth.

"Where's the squid?" "Where's the shrimp?" "WHERE IS MY PILLOW!" The Oresoren were underneath the table again. Unlike last night they weren't being treated first and in their frustration they had began talking and in spite of being told, they were not shutting up.

"HASHBROWN, COME TO ME!"

"GO AWAY ALREADY, MOSES! IT'S MINE GET YOUR OWN!"

"Everyone please be quiet I think the captain is coming," said Shirley softly, her voice as effective as a pin drop in all the chaos. It was like the breakfast from hell in the small dinning room so Shirley decided to try and use the best method to get their attention. She breathed in deeply and was about to scream from the top of her lungs until the dinning room door cracked open.

"Is it alright for me to enter?" politely asked the moving white moustache on the beaten weathered face of the captain. Senel and Moses froze in mid-spork battle action. Will dropped his fork that had a single unmanly piece of green lettuce leaf on it. Chloe stopped eating her bland pancakes and let the last bit in her mouth fall on her plate. Norma continued sitting uncomfortably between the syrup eating Noyem and Moses' leg. Noyem stopped squeezing the syrup bottle and let it fall to the table, the sticky maple substance all over her face. Jay swallowed the last mouthful he had taken, almost choking on the pounds of food he had stuffed in there. And Shirley, realizing that her scream was not needed, let her frustrated anger just swoosh out of her in a long sigh.

"It's good to see all of you up and, um, healthy," greeted the captain halfheartedly. "Did you all have a peaceful rest?" "Oh yes, we were sleeping peacefully until we were woken up," grumbled Chloe as she eyed Norma and Noyem. Norma and Noyem smiled like two perfect little angels. Thirty minutes earlier the two 'angels' had kicked open the door of every cabin and yelled in everyone's ears until they had woken up.

"Well I'm glad to hear that you enjoyed the night," nodded the captain, who hadn't heard Chloe's sarcasm. "I have news that I am sure you will be delighted to hear; we will reach Gadoria at exactly six in the evening today."

"Are we already out of the Legacy's gulf?" Jay asked. He knew how difficult it was for a ship to enter or exit the Legacy, since the moving island had an ever changing speed. "Yes, and the Baltoga's port is only a leagues away," the captain replied.

"Aw, so we can't have another Men Fest tonight?" whined Norma. Everyone, even the captain, stared at her. "ADD-Girl, ex-nay on the peeping-nay," hissed Noyem between her clenched teeth. "What did you say, Noyem?" Will glared at her from across the table. "Nothing, nothing at all," answered Noyem with a fake smile. Her mind wandered back to last night when she had peered under the door to spy on the guys in the bathing room. A fleeting memory of Jay's scarred back entered her mind. _"I forgot to ask him about that..."_ thought Noyem. The only reason she had asked Jay for help with training was to get him alone. But she hadn't brought up enough courage to say: 'Hey, I almost saw you naked last night and I noticed a large scar on your back. Mind explaining that to me while you ignore the fact I practically saw you in your birthday suit?' But even though Noyem could be random even she couldn't bring something like that up.

"Well, I see that you all are still enjoying your breakfast. I shall leave you in peace." The captain bowed quickly and exited the dinning room without another twitch of his moustache. As soon as he left, the chaos continued.

"HASHBROWN OR DEATH!"

"GET AWAY FROM MY PLATE, MOSES!"

"Red, get off the table!" Norma held up her plate, seconds before Moses' foot landed in the spot it had been. Senel stayed in his chair and just kept leaning away from Moses. "Senel, you're going to fall," warned Shirley. "Stopth actingth soth stupidth, you idioths!" spat Jay, spewing pieces of chocolate muffin everywhere. "Do you realize that when you talk with food in your mouth you add 'th' to everything you say?" Chloe inserted randomly.

"Shuth upth."

"Has anyone seen my salad?" Will looked under the table. Smiling back at him were three adorable little otters, eating his salad. "Jay, tell the Oresoren to give me back my breakfast." "But they need to eat too," replied Jay after he swallowed a mouthful of muffin. "Then get them their own food!" Will tried to reach and take his bowl back but Poppo/Fido growled back in return. "Wouldn't want to harm the sickly shih tzu/otters would you?" said Pippo/Pochi brightly.

"Can I have the syrup _now_?" Chloe held her hand out impatiently in Noyem's direction.

Noyem jolted, like she had just been woken up from a long dream. She looked down at the half empty syrup bottle. Suddenly pouring gallons of the sticky maple substance down her throat didn't seem as appealing as it was before. "Yeah, sure." Noyem pushed plastic container towards Chloe. She got out of her chair and went to the door that led to the hallway. "I'm going to take a nap. See you guys later."

"Yammy, wait!" Shirley stood up and walked towards her. Smiling the brilliant smile that made guys melt and girls want to gorge her eyes out. "Do you have any injuries from your practice with Jay? I'll heal them for you." Noyem barely even glanced at Shirley. "I'm fine, just tired." She opened the door and looked back at the breakfast scene.

Norma was trying to pull Moses off the table while Senel stuffed the remaining hashbrown in his mouth. Will was negotiating the return of his salad under the table with the Oresoren (and so far he wasn't winning). Shirley had returned to her seat and was talking to Chloe, who was trying to get the reaming droplets of syrup out of the bottle. And Jay was eating more chocolate muffins, while trying to talk to Senel and Moses at the same time.

Noyem closed the door behind her. The noises of the dinning room halted as if closing the door had sent the world into complete silence. Only her shallow breathing could be heard as she walked to her cabin room, lost in her own thoughts.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Noyem laid on her bed, staring up at the blank ceiling. Her mind as bare as the pinewood beams that crisscrossed above her. She tried to concentrate on something, a thought or memory but everything just seemed to flow slowly through her mind. Everything was too confusing to think about anyway.

"Hi, Yammy!" Norma threw the cabin door open. "You still napping?" Noyem rolled over on her bed so she was facing the door. "Nope, just woke up." In truth, though, Noyem had spent a few hours aimlessly wandering around the ship until coming back to her cabin.

"Is it okay for us to come in?" Chloe peered into the room with Shirley behind her. When the two saw that Noyem was awake they shut the door and sat on the bed across Noyem's. _"Why are they here? Is this going to be some cheesy girl's intervention? Either they'll want to know why I left breakfast or they've come to discuss someone's drinking or smoking problem."_ Noyem leaned against her pillow, still laying on the bed but their was still enough room for Norma to sit comfortably. After Chloe and Shirley sat down Norma clapped her hands together. "Now that everyone is here we can come to order!"

"What are you talking about, Norma?" asked Noyem. She wasn't in the mood for any of Norma's craziness. "We are here to talk about all important matters," declared Norma. Noyem gave Norma a tired look. _"Are we going to talk about men? Again?" _"Shirl is the one who thought this up so I will give her the honor of going first." Norma bowed her head in Shirley's direction.

"Oh, I just wanted to ask you about that crystal ere you use, Yammy. I didn't mean for Norma to make a big deal out of it." Shirley laughed and smiled radiantly. "I meant to ask you over breakfast but, um, you just seemed to be having so much fun with the syrup so I kind of forgot." "Also Coolidge and Sandor's fighting made any conversation impossible," added Chloe.

Noyem shifted nervously on the bed and sat up. "What do you want to know about the ere?" "Just what it's called. It seems a lot like Will's Icicle Volt just in a different form and shape." Shirley talked pleasantly like she was discussing the weather, not weird superhuman powers that made your nails into an instant sparkly manicure. "It is Volt Lighting," began Noyem hesitantly, "but I synched it with another property making it what it is."

"What do you mean by 'synched?'" Norma seemed genuinely curious, although after Shirley had talked for awhile she had began yawning. "I made it different by putting other attributes in it," explained Noyem, hoping they would accept that answer.

"Like iron erens can do with their eres?" asked Chloe. "But I thought crystal erens couldn't do that."

Noyem tried to hide her trepidation by talking nonchalantly. "I was taught to control my powers by...someone." "So you have a teacher," said Norma making the statement sound like a question. Noyem knew what they expected her to explain next. But when she tried to open her mouth to talk she couldn't find the right words. Talking about Jare, even if she didn't mention the name aloud, made her very uncomfortable. She was about to try and talk again until the Senel appeared at the door.

"We've reached Gadoria, the captain is planning to dock any minute!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------

The party had taken an hour in total to organize themselves and repack all of their belongings. They had run around crazily, grabbing their stuff, finding any lost underwear, grooming their thick fur for presentation (well, only the otters...and Moses), smoothing their cabin beds, and saying their last goodbye's to the bushy mustached captain, the cheerful Mabby, and the drunk Rubert. "Ye all take care of yeselfs!" hiccupped Rubert while waving off Will, Senel, Chloe, Norma, Moses, Jay, Shirley, Noyem, and the otter/shih tzus. Everyone had been happy to leave the ship behind once and for all and never see it again, but Will had grimly informed them that the _Irreplaceable Beauty _(Beaty) would be their ride home. _"If you all survive to go home," _Noyem had thought to herself.

Now the group was officially on Baltoga, Gadoria's, hardy soil. Or shitty soil as Norma soon found out.

"EW! EW! EW! EW! I think I stepped in horse crap!" Norma threw down her dozen bags and began wiping her foot furiously against the dirt. "This is so GROSS!" Norma began running around insanely, acting as if she had been told she was going to die in seven rather than have only a mil-piece of horse poop on her boot. "Get it off, GET IT OFF!" Norma ran to Moses, ready to wipe her boot off against his black and white pants.

"Get off a me!" screamed Moses as he tried to back away from the approaching Norma, which was hard for him since he was loaded with eighteen bags.

"Normally the street isn't so dirty," commented Noyem, looking at the rest of the street in front of the group. The cobblestone path was littered with the waste carriage horses left behind.

"So this is what Baltoga has been reduced to..." Chloe stared out at the city that had served as he home many years ago. It was a shadow to what it had been in the past. Ten years ago it had been a peaceful utopia with lively citizens populating the Victorian city in an uproar of gossip and political news. At that moment, though, the streets in the fading twilight were nearly empty.

"It's been this way ever since the Crusand Empire declared war, and Mt. Zelques exploded into a million little bits," said Noyem. Behind her, along with Norma still trying to wipe her soiled boot on Moses, Shirley stood quietly. Half of the reason Mt. Zelques had exploded was her fault.

"Well, Noyem, where do we go from here?"

Noyem looked behind her to see Jay addressing her directly. "Well...um...uh..."

"Our being here is entirely your responsibility, Noyem," said Will, making it sound like he was saying "this is all _your_ fault that we came here in the first place."

Noyem thought for a moment, her mind as blank as it had been in the cabin. Her blank thoughts were interrupted by Norma coming back with the horse shit off her boot.

"I wish we could go somewhere to get my hair fixed at least. It is so frizzy in this air," complained Norma, trying to pat down her light brown hair. _"That's it!" _thought Noyem. _"Makoto and Anne's place!" _

Noyem clapped her hands together, like Norma usually does, to get everyone's attention. "I have some friends who live around here. I've known them for awhile and I know that they will take us all in!"

Senel looked at her skeptically. "Are you sure? But what about getting to..." Senel risked a glance at Jay. "Mercy's home."

"We can't go there now! It would be too soon. And anyway Jay can mentally prepare himself or whatever before he meets her. Just trust me for once."

Senel, Will, Chloe, Norma, Moses, Jay, and Shirley passed unvoiced anxiety to each other. They had already taken a big risk in following Noyem to Gadoria but they had almost been in control the whole time. Now everything was on Noyem's shoulders (and this scared the horse poopie out of every single one of them).

"Fine, lead the way," said Will.

Noyem smiled, a mimic of the lovely smiles Shirley was always showing. "Don't worry, Anne and Makoto and the best people in the word." Noyem winked. "Second only to you great people of course." Noyem picked up her bags and began moving forward off the short dirt path that led to Baltoga's harbor. The click of each step on the flagstone path of the town echoed eerily through the still street. The few people that were walking about stole gaping glances at the newcomers. Some people even tightened their coats and bounded away, intent on separating themselves from the traveling group. The buildings looked like discarded dollhouses, windows dark and grime sticking to the edges of the doors. A light shone out of a window ever now and then in the coming evening, but the comforting glow always disappeared eventually. After walking fifteen minutes, Noyem stopped leading and halted at a stairwell leading down to a gloomy porch.

"Is this their place?" asked Moses. Everyone looked down the stairs, there was no signs of life whatsoever.

"Yep," Noyem replied happily. She was unfazed by the lack of humanity and people. She motioned to the party to stay still and then snuck down the stairs. She rapped on the door in short bursts.

"Do you really think we'll be safe here?" whispered Chloe to Senel. "It feels like she's knocking on the door of a gang society..."

"I'm sure with Noyem, it is a gang society," answered Senel. "But we can't go anywhere else until tomorrow."

"Exactly," continued Chloe. "Where is 'anywhere? We have no idea what we've gotten ourselves into."

Senel wasn't able to answer that. Surprisingly, Quppo was able to explain. "We are here to help Noyams!" he exclaimed. "It's always nice to help people out! And Noyams is our friend too!" "Screw friendship," mumbled Pippo/Pochi. "I just want to get out of this cold!"

Noyem began checking the doorknob. She wiggled it and jerked it and slammed her body into the door. Her actions came to no avail. No one opened the door and the door didn't magically burst open either. Noyem folded her arms across her chest. "This is so weird..." she murmured.

"Maybe they're just not home?" offered Norma.

"No, Makoto and Anne are here...It's in our deal that they always be home at eight or later in case I need to come over. Maybe..." Noyem looked through the small triangular window above the door. "Maybe," she repeated, "it's because I'm not with a guy..."

"What?" asked Shirley.

"Makoto says I have to bring at least one cutie every visit. He must be pouting in his room or something," said Noyem, talking to herself more than talking to everyone else. She pounded on the door again and began talking to it. "Makoto, I swear there is one kinda good looking guy out here! And one I think is **gay** too! Answer this door, PLEASE!"

Suddenly lights burst on in the apartment and the door slammed open. A weirdly dressed eccentric teenager stood in the doorframe. "Hey, Girl, I knew it was you! Just had to make sure, you know? Don't want no pervs (other than you of course) in here!"

Noyem's face broke into friendly recognition. "Makoto, my man-er-girl. What do you mean by no pervs? I thought you loved them!"

"Only the ones for hire," chuckled Makoto. The party tried not to gawk at the freakish Makoto. He was dressed in a pink and white shirt with frill lining the edge and purple totally illegal in at least twenty-seven states pants. His dyed green hair was overly spiky, looking like if you pulled one of you could use it as a weapon. His eyes were too big for a normal male's and his lips too poofy. Also he was wearing blue eye make up. The party just stared in silence at the freak that made Jay look like a normal citizen.

"Makotoy! Don't talk so slutbut in front of the virginnated company (and the old guy who knocked a chick up AHEM)," whispered Noyem, but loud enough for Will to hear. He cleared his throat and reached for his hammer, slowly.

"WHOA!" Makoto faked surprise. "You brought virgins? That is totally new for you. Turning a new leaf?" Will continued to walk towards Noyem, encouraged by the 'virgins' in the background.

Noyem covered her mouth with her hand. "A new bed sheet is more like it."

Will brought up his hammer and was ready to bring down the anger of himself and the virgins, but a hand went on his shoulder. "Excuse me," came a stern voice behind him.

A girl maybe older by a few years than the rest of the girls in the party, pushed Will back and went behind Noyem herself. She had thick oily looking black hair with olive colored skin. She had large spectacles on a crooked hawk nose. She was thin and tired looking, much too tired looking for someone her age. The unknown girl brought up a skinny hand.

"Girl, you are soooo bad!" Makoto and Noyem were continuing their conversation oblivious to what was happening.

"Well, the guys I know don't say I was bad, just too fast," Noyem mimicked Makoto's high pitched chuckle. "But if you want a real reference talk to this uber sexy guy in-"

"You blubbering fool. A man has no less touched you then they would poison ivy dipped in corrosives. You're as pure as you are horrible." The hawk nosed girl brought down her hand quickly against Noyem's skull. The bonk was twice as effective as Will's, it sent Noyem almost headfirst into the door.

"What the hell-Wait, Anne?" Noyem turned around and faced the girl. "Anne! Glad to see you still hate me."

"And it's absolutely horrible to see you alive," said Anne stiffly. Then the petite girl showed a smile as tiny as her structure. "Just kidding, glad to see you're okay."

"Are you two Yammy's friends?" Norma looked at the three standing side-by-side now.

"Yes, I am Anne Lanrich and this is my brother Makoto." Anne bowed then turned towards Noyem. "Quite a large group you brought this time. What happened to the usual one or two?"

"Hey, the guy I found couldn't travel without his little buddies. I had no choice." Noyem patted Anne on the shoulder. "Do you think you could take care of all of us? Or are you just going to leave us in the street?"

Makoto was the first one to answer. "Mmmm," he purred. "Strange selection but nice looking bunch. Why don't we show all of them inside?" He opened the door and spread his arms out. "Come on in, hotties."

Senel, Moses, and Jay suddenly shuddered.

The party entered the comfy small home of the Lanrich's. They immediately walked into a hallway with an opening to a kitchen across from the main door. Makoto and Noyem herded Will, Senel, Chloe, Norma, Moses, Jay, Shirley, and the otters into the warm kitchen where luckily their was enough seats to fit a group of seven. The otters sat along the wall, their tiny bodies were exhausted and Poppo/Fido even snoozed off after Anne walked in and joined Noyem and Makoto in leaning against the counter.

"So your names are Senel, Moses, Jay, Shirley, Chloe, Will, and Norma," stated Anne as she pointed in each at turn. "So which one of you is the great lost son of Mercy? Wait let me guess," she pointed at Senel, "the cutest one of all right?"

Senel cleared his throat sheepishly. Noyem clicked her tongue. "Nope for once it's not. It's the freak in the front." She pointed at Jay.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

"I think the whole selection is superb, if I say so myself," commented Makoto. Once again Senel, Moses, and Jay shuddered at the sound of his voice.

"Um, no offense in my asking," began Shirley, "but how do you two know Noyem and her story?"

Anne adjusted her glasses. "We met Noyem a couple months ago. She had her eye on Makoto she was convinced the he was 'the one' at the time. But to her profound disappoint Makoto was far from being the real thing and all of Noyem's advances are useless against Makoto here."

"What does that mean?" asked Chloe.

"I'm as gay as gays come, honey, so Noyem's magic had zero effect on me," said Makoto with a smile.

"Anyway," sighed Anne. "We learned everything about Mercy, Whitehill, and the situation from Noyem. And since we didn't want to leave the poor useless thing all by herself we decided to help her."

"Whitehill," murmured Jay. He remember Noyem had mentioned a Whitehill earlier but so far he knew nothing. "What is Whiteh-"

_"Great, serious questions." _"So, Anne, what do you think you can do with this lot?" Noyem purposely interrupted Jay. Even standing in front of him to divert the Lanrich's attention.

"They're all hopeless," answered Makoto and Anne at the same time. Makoto examined everyone closely. "One isn't even wearing a shirt (not like I'm complaining though)."

"Hey! What do you mean by hopeless?" insisted Norma.

"You'll find out in the morning," winked Makoto. "Right now though we need to get everyone in bed. If you would all kindly follow me." Makoto hopped off the counter. "Oh wait, I totally blow as a host. Let's get everyone fed first, Sissy."

Anne rolled her eyes at her queer brother. "Only you, Makoto, could forget something like eating." Anne gracefully lifted herself off the counter and began rooting through the cupboards. "We don't have luxury food but we have enough to feed all of you." Anne took ten teacups and laid them on the table. She slapped Noyem and Makoto's knees. "You two help me."

"We can help too if you want," offered Shirley as she began getting up.

"Fine then," said Anne. "You go and get some plates from the shelf there." Anne pointed to a shelf above the area the Oresoren were sleeping. "And you, Jay, go get those whatever-they-are out of the kitchen and into the hallway." Jay nodded and began taking up the dropped figure of Poppo/Fido. "Chloe, go into the first room on the left side of the hallway. That's where all of you will be sleeping so you better fix up. It's been years since I myself have ever cleaned it. Take Senel with you too." Anne waved Senel and Chloe off as the two were stuck at cleaning duty just as they had been only a few days before at Will's house. "Moses, go find some more chairs. I don't care where you get them but just bring them here. Norma, help Noyem with cooking. And, Will, help Makoto with boiling the meat. And Makoto," Anne stopped a moment in her ordering rampage, "please don't try to convert anyone to your beliefs. It's hard enough with just one homosexual around."

So everyone went to complete their jobs as Anne kept shouting orders. She changed people's errands dramatically; made Shirley clean every plate she found, made Noyem and Norma start over on cooking the cornbread because they made it too soft, made Chloe and Senel clean ALL of the rooms, made Jay go out and buy fish (even though Noyem profusely objected), made Makoto gag himself because he was talking about how much fun being gay was, made Moses make chairs that would perfectly match the other kitchen's, and lastly made Will help her order people around because after two hours Anne was seriously hoarse from yelling so much.

And finally, after three hours of chores, everyone was ordered to sit down and eat.

"You know," panted Shirley, her hands sore from wiping plate after plate, "when I said we could help, I was thinking of simpler tasks."

Anne passed a plate of cornbread to Senel and Moses, who were, for once in their lives, too tired to fight over food. "Well, what type of host would I be if I let you all just sit there bored?"

"When you offer Ann-Ban help, she never refuses it." Makoto cut off a thin slice of meat from the ham on the table and took a small bite into it. "Believe me I know, I've lived with her too long."

"You two don't look related," said Jay as he tried to hold a light blue teacup in his hand normally. His fingers had wrapped around it uncomfortably and he couldn't loosen them.

"But we are! Or at least I think we are, but look we have the same eye color." Makoto took his sister's face and widened her left eye by prying it open. Like himself, Anne had the same gray eyes as her brother. Makoto let go off Anne's face. "We were both abandoned at the same orphanage at the same time, so people just started calling us brother and sister."

"Oh, you were abandoned? I'm so sorry," said Chloe softly.

"No big deal, if we hadn't grown up in that crappy place we would have never met Noyem." Makoto put a hand on Noyem's shoulder. "We're like girlfriends now aren't we Noyemcoyem? Although your big buddy Whitehill burned down the entire orphanage when he found out you were living there."

Noyem gulped down a piece of cornbread. "Hey, I was only living there cause I was trying to get you to come with me. And not too many people died in the-"

"Who wants cake?" asked Anne suddenly, shutting Noyem up.

The rest of the evening passed uneventfully as conversation was thrown around the table in chunks. The only meaningful talk that was said was when Makoto asked if any of the cute boys were gay.

"I think the pale one is," answered Noyem jutting her head towards Jay.

"WhAt?"

"Oh yippe!" Makoto clapped his hands together like Noyem had given him a new toy (ewww, for some reason typing that made me sick a little).

Eventually though, dinner was finished with only one crumb of cornbread and one cup of half empty tea was left. The Oresoren who had been staying in the room freshly scrubbed, dried out, and decontaminated by Senel and Chloe had tucked into the fish Jay bought them. The single lone grandfather clock at the end of the hallway stroke twelve and the party sorted themselves into sleeping bags and fell into an undisturbed rest brought on by their fatigue from the tasks they had endured earlier.

Noyem was the only member awake in the hallway, standing beside Makoto and Anne in front of the guest room listening to the rustles in sounds people make when their in deep sleep. "So are you going to fix some of them up tomorrow?" she asked.

Anne took the glasses off her nose and rubbed her temple. "It will be hard. Especially that shirtless and overly pale one."

"But we'll do everything we can," promised Makoto, "even if we have to put them through fashion hell!"

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_"I almost feel sorry for what they're going to go through...but I can't wait for the results though." _Noyem was the first to wake up. She pushed the thick material of the sleeping bag off her and gently lifted Quppo off her legs. She cupped her hands around her mouth. _"Here goes nothing." _

"WAKE UP! FIRE, FLOOD, HURRICANE, TORNDADO, AND OTHER NATURE STUFF LIKE THAT IS HAPPENING! WAKE UPPPPPPPPP!"

Norma, whose sleeping bag was next to Noyem's, woke up with a spastic flinch. "What the heck...Yammy, what was that?"

Chloe threw her covers off. "FLOOD? FLOOD? WHERE?" She looked around crazily for the wall of water that spelled her worst nightmare. Shirley woke up more slowly. "Huh? Who was screaming so loud?" She rubbed her eyes and yawned in a cute sleepy way that would have made even the hardest boys say, 'awwww.'

"Noyem, you idiot, are you trying to make us hate you?" Jay said next. His usual un-Casanova attractiveness was at full force in the early morning. "That sure was one of the best mornin calls I've ever heard," said Moses.

Will, sleeping at the end of the room, took the sleeping mask off his head. "I knew I should have brought earplugs," he sighed regretfully. Senel turned over in his sleeping bag. "Three more minutes."

"No wake up now, Makoto and Anne are going to fix you all up with formal wear before we leave. And unless you want to be forced out of bed by my good, boy-crazy friend I suggest getting up now."

Senel immediately woke up. "Okay, I'm up. What do you want us to do?"

Noyem grinned. "Like I just told you, Makoto and Anne are going to fix you guys up."

"We're going to get new outfits?" asked Norma excitedly.

"Of course, some of you look so horribly dressed butlers would kick you out before you stood on Mercy's front yard." Noyem stood up and opened the door. "No one even worry about brushing your hair or teeth. Makoto and Anne are best with raw materials, in fact they're the best in the whole fashion business."

"Wait, you're tellin me those two are fashion designers?" Moses shook his head. "Unbelievable." Moses was saying the truth, Anne and Makoto looked like fashion impairments not fashion geniuses.

"The things they do are unbelievable. You'll believe me once they've transformed you into a person that would be half accepted into society," jeered Noyem.

The party emptied into the hallway that was, when brightly lit up with sunlight coming through the windows, a truly picturesque sight compared to the gloom it was the night before. With the apartment brightened, the numerous doors were visible. Each door had a sign hanging over it, each one saying a letter of the alphabet on it going from A to the closest to the main door to Q that was at the end of the hallway next to the rustic grandfather clock.

"With so many rooms it seems like we could have each had our own last night," said Chloe. The guest room had been too cramped and along with having to endure the snoring Moses everyone, especially Jay, Shirley, Senel, Chloe, and Noyem, had to endure Norma's highly annoying sleep talks ("you'll never get taller...you'll always just be his sister...you're too spineless...you'll never confess your feelings...you stuff your bra...").

"That is where you are wrong, Madam Valens." Anne stepped out of room B with a tape measure in her hand. "This home was once a theater add on. Every room leads to an old actor's dressing room." Anne brought the tape measure up to her eye and snapped the flexible measuring felt. "And each of you will go into one."

"Leave it to Little Orphan Annie to make something like a makeover threatening," commented Norma. "Where's Makoko?"

"Here I am!" Makoto talked in one of his over high pitched male voices as he skipped out of the same room his sister had been in. He too had a measuring tape. "I say we get this started!"

"We take the most problematic now, leave the most normal ones," Anne stated. "Now line up, all of you. We'll choose the victims." The party except Noyem and Will stood with their back straight against the wall, unblinking and unmoving. Normally they would have objected but Anne's tone had almost frightened them into doing what she said.

"Is this really necessary?" Will had been quietly excused from the group since being an adult and already wearing acceptable enough clothing.

"Hey, Jay Boy is dressed like a freak and the Shirtless Wonder is...well shirtless," replied Noyem. She focused her attention on the group. _"This is going to be entertaining..." _

Anne pulled at Jay's sleeves. "What type of outfit is this? Reject from Ninja's Suck Us? And _leggings_ with it? Purple leggings?" She grabbed Jay by the shoulders. "He is definitely first."

Makoto eyed Norma. "The hair is way too messy even for morning hair and the yellow dress screams, 'Please don't make fun of this outfit.' Makoto took Norma's hand. "She's first for my group."

"Wait, both of you are going to work on two different people at the same time?" Jay tried to pull himself away from Anne's steel grip.

"I work on the boys, Makoto works on the girls," said Anne. Jay tried to yank Anne's hand off his shoulder.

"But what about...I mean you're a girl...and I'm..."

"Fine then, if you're that uncomfortable, I'll let Makoto work on you." Anne let go of Jay. At that moment Makoto winked flirtatiously and licked his lips. In the next second every straight guy on Earth suddenly quivered horribly.

"TAKE ME WITH YOU, ANNE!" Jay hid behind Anne and shook violently from his disturbing encounter. Anne took Jay by the sleeve and continued dragging him to one of the dressing rooms while Makoto took the giggling Norma with him.

"Do we have to go under this?" asked Senel, staring off at Jay being dragged away. "Every single one of you," confirmed Noyem. "And don't worry, it will pass over soon enough."

_**A few hours later...**_

"PUT THE FREAKING SHIRT ON!"

"GET IT AWAY FROM MEEEEEE!"

"Be a man, Moses, we had to go through it."

"Wearing a shirt won't kill you."

"YES IT WILL!"

Moses wrestled away from Anne and Makoto who were trying to hold the wild man down. A formal black shirt was scrunched in Anne's hands. Anne tried to shove the shirt back on Moses. "Sit still you, buffoon!" Makoto tried to hold Moses' arms out but Moses kicked him away and ran down the hall screaming, "I HATE SHIRTS!"

Senel shook his head sadly. "Sorry, I never knew Moses had a fear of clothing." Senel was dressed in a reserved black suit that was similar to the one that Anne and Makoto had tried to shove Moses into. Senel's hair was smoothed down giving him a sleek, smart look and the coloration of the clothing made his skin look even darker. Chloe, Norma, and Shirley had already given him endless comments on his new look.

"I always thought someone like Red wasn't afraid of anything." Norma shrugged her shoulders. "I guess not." She was purposely trying to get Moses to react to her comments but he kept screaming and running down the hallway. "Geez, crybaby." Norma folded her arms over the chest of her new dress. It was yellow like her regular outfit but a body tight dress that extended to her feet. A gold intricate design twirled up the side of the gown. The design ended at the side of her right arm and looped back down to the side. Norma flipped back a lock of her straightened hair. For once it wasn't frazzled everywhere and a canary colored headband kept bangs from hanging down into her face that had been lightly tweaked into perfection by light makeup.

Chloe was dressed similarly to Norma. Her dress was dark blue with a V neck on the front and the back. She had demanded to keep her hair the same way but she had let Makoto apply makeup. But like Noyem's, her dress had a matching black jacket but instead of it being full length of the dress the jacket ended at Chloe's midriff and was tied together with a single string.

"Maybe we should try to bribe Moses into putting a shirt on," suggested Shirley. Compared to the other girls, Shirley was wearing the outfit that stuck out the most. Instead of a tight fitting gown hers was more loose after the waist. It was a beautiful white satin with the top area sea blue cut in a square around the chest area. The dress was completely sleeveless.

"Makoto, where are my tranquilizer guns?" Anne looked to her brother to find him shrugging. "I don't know," he answered, "I think you left them in the room you took that pale kid in."

"You mean Jay?" Pippo tilted his head curiously. The Oresoren had crawled out of the room earlier and ever since had been helping Anne and Makoto with dressing everyone. "Speaking of Jay, where is he?" Quppo looked around the hallway. "I haven't seen him since we woke up," said Poppo.

"You're right...In fact I don't remember ever seeing him come out of one of the dressing room," mused Chloe. "I remember Anne putting him in there, and then taking Coolidge in there...Do you remember seeing him?" Chloe faced Senel who suddenly trembled at the moment of being taken into dressing room B.

"Everything was such a fast blur in there, I don't remember a thing that happened."

"A blur? What do you mean, Senny? Didn't you feel relaxed and stress free while going through your makeover?" asked Norma.

Senel trembled again. "No, I think was unconscious half the time..."

"Do you remember what Anne did to you?" asked Will.

"I was tied to a chair while my hair was being brushed, I remember that..."

Noyem watched the group with mild interest. She had seen Makoto and Anne transform street bums into brilliant living works of art and what they had done to the party was barely a show of their talent. She stifled a yawn. The morning was too boring for her. But Noyem knew why Anne was trying to make the group ready so quickly. They would all soon be taken to the Lekeya estate.

Footsteps could be heard behind her. Noyem took her attention off the rest of the group, that was either hunting Moses down or comforting Senel's traumatic makeover experience. She placed a hand to her pocket her nerves sharp from hunger (no one had eaten since Makoto didn't want anyone's outfit ruined). Noyem glimpsed behind her to identify whoever it was. And after staring open mouthed for a few moments Noyem was able to identify whoever it was as... _"a pretty cute hottie." _

The _pretty cute hottie_ looked about the same age as Noyem. He was wearing a strange white outfit with a gray almost invisible design of a chain wounding around the loose fitting shirt. A few dark strands of hair hung over his eyes with the rest tied together in a loose ponytail that hung unevenly across his back. The left side of the ponytail was longer than the right, as if it had been cut wrong.

Noyem smiled coyly at the new stranger. _"This guy...totally makes me forget all about that homo Jay! I'm finally cured! Finally cured from my horrible love curse on Jay-Freak!" _Noyem batted her eyes like a love struck teenager. She let her hands slide down the sides of her hips. "I've never seen you around here before, have I? I think I would have remember seeing you." Noyem's voice came out in a catlike purr that would have normally sent testosterone pumping (EW! Don't envision that).

Whoever-he-was stepped back, totally grossed out. "What is wrong with you, Noyem? You're acting worse than you normally do."

Noyem's heart stopped beating wildly. That voice was all too familiar. "J-J-J-J-J-J," was all she could stammer before Norma noticed what was going on behind her.

"Hey, look! It's JJ!"

Noyem fell to the ground. "Jay? What the..? Why...? How...?" She rubbed her eyes. _"So much for being cured, I should have known it was him. His skin is still freakishly pale, although the white outfit actually makes him look a bit less pale..." _

"Wow, is that really you, JJ?" Norma peered under Jay's long bangs to look him in the face. "You look so different, next to Senny I now rate you the second most attractive guy in the Fun Bunch. Congrats!"

"What a great honor," huffed Jay. He still had all of the same expressions but with such a new look the sarcasm face was, like Noyem mentioned earlier, pretty cute.

"WHOA, is that really short, little, pale, creepy, big fore-headed, eye liner makeup wearin, freaky side ponytail with no sense of style _Jay_?" Moses crawled out of his hiding place behind the grandfather clock. Makoto, who had been using a stick to try and prod Moses out, was amazed. "Sissy, did you really do that to that freak earlier? He looks so different..." Makoto stared at Jay in the same teen-age hormoned way Noyem had used earlier.

"You know not all of you have to act so surprised," said Jay.

"What did you do with the real Jay?" demanded Poppo. "Tell us and we won't spare you!" screamed Pippo. "It's 'will spare you', not 'won't,'" said Quppo.

"Anne, you're a miracle worker," stated Will. "I think God would be the more appropriate term for what she did," said Senel. "Don't be exaggerate, Coolidge," said Chloe, "you can still tell it's Jay."

"Um, thanks, Chloe," said Jay not knowing if Chloe's comment was suppose to be good or bad.

Shirley gave Jay a cute, warm smile. "That outfit does look good on you."

Jay stared down at the carpet, his face red. "Thank you," was all he could murmur. _"Ew, I can't take all these warm fuzzy emotions anymore..." _Noyem got off the floor and took Jay's hand.

"You know if you had been this good looking when I had to kiss you I would have been only half way repulsed. Of course, winners can't be choosers." Noyem pressed herself harder against Jay. "But you're just so darn adorable I think I reward you with another peck."

"GET OFF MY ARM!" Jay began shaking his arm up and down violently, shaking Noyem along with it. Noyem still wouldn't let go. "Get off, get off!" He began pulling his arm away from Noyem. She just tightened her grip.

"What a sweet...and disturbing sight," said Makoto.

"They usually do stuff like that," shrugged Moses.

"Speaking of disturbing things lets take care of you right now." Anne grabbed Moses by a grasp of pink hair and began dragging him towards room B. She laughed evilly while doing so. "I still have a lot of tranquilizer left from Jay's turn to knock you out, so much in fact it could leave you dead! Muahahaha!"

Moses clawed the floor helplessly. "Someone please help me..."

"Don't worry, if you cooperate it'll end quicker," promised Anne in an unpromising tone.

"Well then hurry up, Sissy," said Makoto peering through the blinds of a nearby window. "The carriages we sent for are already here."

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AFTERWORD: Ok, remember my apologies earlier about this coming out so late? Well now I'm going to rephrase that: I"M SORRY THIS CHAPTER SUCKED SO MUCH! Ugh...I think I wrote it a bit too hurriedly and horridly (WAAAAH!).

Jay: Hahaha, give up on writing this and do your homework.

Me: Ugh, you're too mean to me. So today I'm going to have a different guest. Presenting...MAKOTO!

Makoto: Hi everybody. Anyone seen the show, _Desperate Housewives _lately? I must say, those women are less desperate them me in a straight bar HA!

Me: YAY! Gay guys are always so cute (when they're not creepy looking). Did you know, Makoto, that your name even means stereotypical gay? Or so I learned from my religious show, _X-Play _(I think it really means honest and sincere in Japanese names). And the name Jay means someone thoughtlessly talkative?

Jay: And DragonQuester means Dragon Quest obsessed fan-girl who can't even concentrate on tying her shoes without be reminded of the game she spent 122 hours on her life on?

Me: GASP! It was 122,000 you fool! Don't make fun of me!

Makoto: Tsk, tsk, a girl should do more than sit around and play video games.

Me: WAH! Both of you, stop making fun of me! (takes out overly large and comical looking machine gun and points it at Jay, takes overly small and overly destructive hand grenade and points it at Makoto. Shoots Jay and throws grenade at Makoto) (big blowy up sound here) WAIT! Oh crappo, I killed two characters! Who can replace them both?...wait I have an idea (takes out cellphone) Hello? Michael Jackson? It's me DragonQuester, I was just wondering...can you play two parts?

Ahhh, MJ what would I do without you...other than spare everyone on MJ jokes. ANYWAYS, that's all I can horridly write for now, see ya everybody! And remember, school only sucks cuz about every teacher you know is a vampire! Thanks for the review, KamikazeHikira, and no offense but WHAT WERE YOU PLANNING TO DO WITH YOU BROTHER! I'll start eh...improving (quote, quote) next chapter cuz like I said earlier something sets something else into effect. I'm only doing this kinda funny chapters to move the story on...so keep reading (sniff, sniff) if you want to find out...and to make me feel better.


	12. Chapter 12

I do not own Tales of Legendia. I do own some socks my grandpa left me in his will...but they smell like smoky beer. I also own...THIS HORRIDLY LATE CHAPTER! Four, NO FIVE, no, SIX weeks have gone by and then it just hit me after weeks of miserable school, family crapola, and two bloody periods, it hit me: Hey, don't I have an account on I do? Oh...'(()))(&monkey88))and the horse(&))))()(&Beetles&)))&((()(&()&( noodles()((&((!' So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, SORRY! I am a like a blonde ditz, minus the attractiveness and blonde hair. And then it hit me again: Which one is my story? That crappy one there? Oh, (insert long string of multiple, crude, insulting to various people's momma's, and illegal in California, curse words). And I'm sure all forty or less of you will find out: I suffer from writingOsuckyohwhywritethiscrap? syndrome, no cure found so far. It's not writer's block...just a form of it. Big difference. ANYWAYS, all forty or less of you, if you have given up on me (which you probably did long ago) it's OK. I give up on myself too, mostly due to my second syndrome, where I can't talk and think at the same time. But alas, I dragged my lazy, non-blonde, non-attractive, booty up to my attic and sat myself down on my non-blonde, non-attractive, smells like rabbit pee, computer chair and decided to finish this non-blonde, non-attractive, also smells like rabbit pee, really horribly planned and late, fanfic. I hope, probably like ten of you (negative ten), have decided to look upon yourselves and say: "Wow, DragonQuester sucks, but we will give her false hope by giving her fake hits." And to those who do, thank you, thank you so much from the bottom of my non-blonde, non-living, heart. Now here, after about a MONTH, is chapter 12. Note: to those of you who are really nice you can give me more false hope by giving me reviews, that would boost my non-blonde, false, self-confidence so much. And you can be mean in your reviews too. In fact, go ahead and pick out horrid things in my grammar and writing. It will make you feel good, make me feel stupid, and make the review number go up. And the review number, is the only thing that matters. ANYWAYS, after a long horrid wait, here is chapter twelve. And also note that since it has been weeks since I have written anything (other than essays about the growth of mucus for science), my writing may be...sticky...and horrible. Mostly horrible. Also I had to use a text document so if there are any problems like some stuff isn't slanted or underlined or in proper paragraphs, just blame me. ANYWAYS, on with chapter 12.

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The horses pawed the ground in anxious energy. They raised their mighty black heads and shook it when a fly zoomed in too close for comfort. Their midnight flanks rose with every breath as they tried to keep standing still for a few minutes longer. The short dwarfish driver of one of the two carriages took out a pipe and lighted it in the cool morning air. He puckered it to his lips and let out a tendril of smoke from the corners of his mouth. The other driver was as calm as his partner but consumed his time by staring at Jay.

Jay felt uncomfortable under the man's stare. He knew it would be rude to say 'what'cha staring at?', but it was also rude to look at someone unblinkingly and not say a word as the person being stared at squirmed under the unwanted attention. Finally, after a few more seconds of an awkward staring contest, Jay couldn't stand it any longer. "What do you want?" he asked brusquely.

The man blinked slowly before answering. He spoke clearly and slow, with his eyes still on Jay. "Nothing, nothing. You just look like you don't belong here, sir." He turned his head towards the stairwell behind Jay. "Normally people in front of here look...different."

Jay was utterly shocked. For the first time in his life someone had called him sir. But Jay wasn't about this new male pride tide over. He wondered what the man could be talking about. "Look different how?"

Before the man could answer, the driver with the pipe spoke out first. "Most young men who stand out in front of that house look like either male hookers or homosexuals." His voice was scratchy and his tone implied that he had seen so many male hookers and homosexuals, he didn't care anymore.

_"He must be referring to the people Noyem brought before,"_ thought Jay. _"Male hookers and homosexuals...yeah the only men attracted to Noyem."_ Jay replied to driver's statement. "I don't think you'll be seeing anymore people like that." _"Other than Makoto."_ Jay looked down the stairwell and at the door that led into the small house. The drivers didn't speak again and went back to smoking and having staring contests with random objects.

Jay had escaped outside after Noyem had practically attacked him by jumping on his arm. It had taken him four minutes to pry her fingers away and then, using Makoto as a human shield when going to the door, he had fled to the safety of the street. No one had come out to take him back inside so he presumed that it was better if he stayed where he was. The Lanrich household was too insane to put up with anyway. Senel, Will, Chloe, Norma, Moses, Shirley, Noyem, the Oresoren, and Jay had arrived there the night before. Everyone had worked the night away at the whim of Anne. And during dinner the boys had been seriously freaked out by Makoto's come-ons. When the party finally tried to get a well deserved sleep, they were woken up by Noyem's alarm call at a ridiculous hour. The group had to be prepared before going to Mercy's estate so everyone, except Will, the Oresoren, and Noyem, had to endure makeovers in the early dawn hours. So far Moses was the only who hadn't come out of the makeover room from hell.

Jay brought up a hand to rub sleep out of one eye. As he lowered his arm he stopped. He stared at the white sleeve of his shirt. His new clothes felt so strange to him. Gone were the stars and weird cast offs from some Mardi Gras drunken party shapes and designs. Replacing them was the design of a chain. It was so light and so interlaid with the white fabric that from far away the shirt looked pure white. But there were only a few white spaces, the gray complex chains almost covered every inch. But what Jay disliked about the shirt was that it was too tight against him. It wasn't one of those, freakishly-stretched-over-the-muscles-so-tightly-you-wondered-how-that-person-even-put-the-shirt-on tight shirts. It was simply loose fitting. Also Anne had opened the shirt collar just so much, but just so little, so that it left a girl with the imagination of what was under the fabric.

Jay put his hand back to his side and looked out at the quiet street. A mist hung over the air and the activity was nothing more than a mumble. Shops lit up their stores making the depressing atmosphere almost bearable, but the lights seemed to dim as time slowly dragged on. It was only eight, but there should have been more people about. The only people that were out shuffling through the street had their gazes averted from everyone else's. Something as simple as a sneeze or a cough could break through the air and echo for miles. A few people talked softly to each other, too softly, as if they were afraid of some unknown presence. The harbor street of Baltoga had the aura of a graveyard.

...or it did until the sound of someone banging a door open very loudly exploded through the air.

"C'MON PEOPLE! OUT, OUT, OUT, OUT, OUT, OUT! GET YOUR HOT AND ATTRACTIVE A DOUBLES S IN THOSE CARRIAGES!" Makoto stood, like a possessed male cheerleader, on the doorstep. He held the door open as wide as it could get. Then he grabbed whatever was inside and pulled it out. It was Senel. Makoto took him by the shirt collar and threw him, actually threw him, up the stairwell. Next were Norma, then Chloe, then Shirley. Each landed in a heap then scurried up before the next person was thrown out on their rump. Jay had to jump from place to place to avoid being hit by one of his flying friends (although when Shirley was thrown out Jay thought of catching her, to look all heroicy, but decided against it when Senel leapt to the position first). Lastly, Will walked out calmly and Makoto held the door open for him like a good little gay boy would do.

"Adieu, everyone," bowed Makoto, once everyone was thrown and standing. "I enjoyed meeting every one of you hot tamales (and you girls too). I will miss talking to you, seeing you, watching your backs (and you know which part) when you moved, watching you in your sleep, spying on you, looking through your things, smelling your things, and..."

"Please, stop, before I start understanding what you're saying," begged Senel as he shook from the chill brought on by Makoto's voice.

"Soooorry," said Makoto sarcastically. "Just wanting to tell you all bye before you go off."

"I'm sure we'll see each other again," said Chloe. She moved a strand of brown hair that had fallen on her face from her harsh landing. "You don't have to act like this is the last time you'll see us."

"Oh yeah." Makoto laughed nervously. "Of course, you guys will have to pass this place when you go...home." Makoto laughed again, but it was a faint, forced laugh. "Silly me, I take stuff too far. Like widdle NoyemCoyem."

_"That seemed too fake,"_ thought Jay as heard Makoto laugh. _"Have people who come here before..."_ Jay stopped himself from finishing his thought. _"No, he's just acting stupid like usual."_

"Jay, is something on your mind?" asked a voice from behind Jay. The voice was as sweet as the fist sip of apple juice, the first rays of the sun, the fist spoonful of honey. A voice that made Jay's heart pound like it was suicidal and wanted to beat his blood so hard it would squirt out of his veins (what the hell is with these similes?-Jay.)

"Sh-Shirley," stammered Jay. Shirley moved right in front of him and was too close for Jay to think pure thoughts. "I'm fine, just..."

"Worried?" finished Shirley. "I'm sure everything will go just fine. If Mercy is your mother, everything will be great. But..." Shirley looked down at her feet. She fingered the end of her flawless white dress. "Jay, if you meet your family. Your real family...will you want to stay with them?"

Jay considered the question carefully. He knew he would have to give a Tales of Legendia monumental answer that deals with the very existence of life. But Jay was hoping that a certain someone would answer before him and give the simplest possible answer that would end the question in a second. Jay looked around. Now where was that certain stupid annoying someone?

Will noticed it too. "Where's Moses?"

"I knew it was too boring. Both Red and Yammy aren't here," said Norma. She was sitting on the top step of the stairwell, her hands on her knees supporting her head. Her yellow dress was made out of such a valuable material, it didn't even wrinkle when she stood up. "I wonder if Little Orphan Anne is still working on him."

"Poor, Moses." Senel placed a hand on Norma's shoulder. "I'm afraid you'll never see him again, Norma."

"Why?"

"The harsh reality of Annie may be too difficult for you to deal with," said Senel with a tear in his eye. "You see, she is very-"

"HERE HE IS!" screamed a terrifyingly commanding voice. The door once again exploded open. The light shone from the house, making the figure in the doorway appear to have a holy glow in the dark morning. The group froze in what they were doing and stared at the figure in awe. It was like a true angle, a saint in the midst of darkness, a Buddha in an endless desert, an _All American Rejects_ concert in a boring sermon.

Then the holy figure thingy fell to its face.

"Get up, you freak." A cold hard voice that erased all of those happy thoughts from before came from the doorway. Frameless glasses on a hawk crooked nose below gray eyes came into sight. "I worked this disaster in ten minutes and I think I did a good job on Mr. No Shirt." Anne smiled her thin smile as she turned to go back inside. "I just hope I didn't use too much of my good tranquilizer."

Jay half laughed, half shivered from the memory, when he thought back to what Anne's special tranquilizer was named. Then he looked at the splattered thing that had fallen flat on the stairwell porch. "Wait, is that Moses?"

Will went down the stairs and looked at the fallen, drooling figure. "Yes," said Will as he lifted Moses' head, "it's our Moses."

Norma jumped next to Will and knelt down. "Ohmigod, it is Red! In CLOTHES!" Norma rubbed her hand through Moses' pink hair. "His hair is even brushed...Little Orphan Annie is a fashion goddess!"

Will picked up Moses by the arm while Norma took the other one. Together the two dragged Moses up the stairs into better light.

Moses was almost unrecognizable. Like Senel, he was wearing light black formal pants. His hair was brushed and parted and actually clean looking. Across his usual bare chest was a shirt, that's right, A SHIRT. The collar was unbuttoned and only a few were actually snapped at the bottom, so the tan chest was still shown off. But what was so different about Moses was that the bulky, large eye patch was gone. The eye patch that had made Moses' face look so thin had been replaced, by a gentleman's monocle. The monocle had a large gold rim so the scars around Moses' eye were hidden. The light from the rising sun and few shops were reflected by the glass so the scar sealing Moses' eye shut seemed obsolete. Moses actually looked like a normal, living human being...if it wasn't for the fact that he was so drugged up he could barely stand straight.

"Wow," breathed Chloe. "Sandor was slightly attractive without the eye patch before, but now he looks almost..." Chloe realized what she had just said. "I mean, Sandor looks, good."

Shirley giggled. "I think Noyem is influencing you, C."

Chloe brushed rapidly. "I have nothing in common with that man-chaser."

"Oh? So that time in the hallway looking in on the bathing who was complaining about that censoring mist? Huh, C? Huh?" taunted Shirley.

Chloe began walking away with her hands over her ears. "I can't hear you, Shirley, I can't hear you."

Shirley skipped after her in an over uppity, annoying to even a pixie, singing voice. "C is a pervert! C is a pervert!"

"All we need is the Oresoren and we'll be ready to go," stated Senel, apparently not noticing Chloe and Shirley running and skipping around. "Where are they anyway?"

"Hmph! Ask about the otters, not your super cool friend Noyem." A head peered around the edge of the open door. "You know how loved I feel right now? All of you having your sweet talk while I'm busting my beauty booty." Noyem walked out the door in a huff. She flipped back her auburn hair and blinked her alluring amber eyes. "It almost makes me cry."

Noyem stepped out of the doorway with two brown paper bags in her hand. "The otters and I were making you ungrateful bunch lunches, since no one ate anything for breakfast." From behind her, Pippo, Quppo, and Poppo walked out. They were back in their original clothes much to Pippo and Poppo's delight. Quppo hung behind his brothers, depressed that he wasn't wearing his collar anymore.

"Ors!" chipped Poppo. "You all look so fancy in your new clothes!"

"Except Moses," added Poppo giving a second 'ors' to his brother before saying, "he's drooling in Norma's hair."

"Really?" mumbled Norma, drool leaking off the side of her head where Moses' head was resting. "I hardly noticed."

Noyem and the Oresoren joined Senel, Will, Chloe, Norma, Moses, Shirley, and Jay in front of the carriages. Noyem handed one of her bags to Senel. Stream was rolling off the top and a heavenly aroma was wafting out. "Here, you hold on to this one, I hold on to the other. The bags have enough to feed a small army and since each carriage can only hold four passengers, we'll split. Three with you, three with me."

Senel peered into the bag and pulled out a mouthwatering hashbrown. "I didn't know you were so considerate, Noyem. I always thought you were a self-absorbed, lunatic, hare-brained, chick." Senel bit into his bleated breakfast while Noyem beamed from the halfway insulting praise.

"Hare-brained? I thought that was my name," said Chloe. Her running away from Shirley had led her back to Senel. She stood beside him with her arms across her chest. Senel shrugged and gulped down the hashbrown to take another bite.

The holy, smells-so-good-you-would-sell-your-soul-for-a-taste, scent drifted over to unconscious Moses. Moses' nose twitched. He lifted his head. His nose twitched again. Then he opened his eyes. He pushed Norma and Will away and lifted his head higher in the air. Nose twitched again. Then he howled like the starving, wild, pink haired, man he is.

"FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!" Moses charged at Senel and ripped the bag out of his hand. "FOOD FOOD FOOD!" He tore into it and began eating rapturously. Chunks of doughnuts, hashbrown, and muffins scattered everywhere in the battleground of The Food vs. Moses. So far Moses was winning, with the poor delicious brunch being thrown into the mouth of the still slightly drugged body every other breath. No one, not even Senel, tried to stop Moses. He wasn't human anymore. Moses' instinct to eat had taken complete control of his little mind.

"Quite a disgraceful eating habit, right Mr. Dick?"

"Hell yes, Mr. Rick. I miss the male hookers. At least they had manners, right Ricky?"

"Indeed, Mr. Dick. I so do miss those colorful sexually confused boys. These people here haven't even taken notice of us. Quite rude, quite rude indeed!"

_"British? Who's using British humor? This place is too crude for something sophisticated."_ thought Jay. He searched for the British voices. Surprisingly it was the two carriage drivers. The one who liked staring contests, apparently Mr. Rick, was talking normally instead of the slow, I'm-afraid-my-vocabulary-is-too-big-for-you voice he had used earlier. The smoking driver, Mr. Dick, had put his pipe down long enough so his voice had lost the scratchy edge.

"Mr. Dick and Mr. Rick, why how lovely it is to see you two fine gentlemen today." Noyem had turned around and taken notice of the two British men. She bended her knees and took the edges of her skirt in a small curtsy. "I take it you two are to be our drivers to Madam Mercy's estate?" Noyem pursed her mouth into an elegant, aristocrat, smile. She spoke with a forced British accent that defined the word 'cheesy.'

"Watch yourself, girl," growled Mr. Dick. "Any of your usual antics and we'll dump you and your little gang in the middle of the street." He hopped off the driver's perch. He landed with hardly a sound.

Mr. Dick was a short, stout man with no outstanding features. His bald head looked overly shiny, though, shiny enough to reflect UV rays. He wore a blue suite that stretched over his chubby girth and a striped tie tucked in the collar. The short man looked rather comical, a chubby little man that stood only to about Jay's middle (so you know that is short). Following his companion, Mr. Rick hopped down as well. Mr. Rick was the exact twin of Mr. Dick. Both were of equal height and thickness. Only Mr. Rick had a spotted tie and his head was probably shiny enough to reflect gamma rays.

"Everyone," said Mr. Rick, "I believe you should all get moving. The trip is a rather long one and Mr. Dick and I would like to get moving immediately." As he spoke the two drivers latched open the doors to their carriages. "But we can't go without luggage, unless none of you have any belongings."

In an instant reply, the door of the Lanrich household flew open one more time.

"How much crap did you guys pack?" huffed Makoto. In his arms was half of the luggage Senel, Will, Chloe, Norma, Moses, Shirley, Jay, and Noyem had brought. Behind him, lost under an enormous pile of suitcases in her arms, was Anne with the rest.

"Will, load this junk into the back of the carriages with Makoto. And do it correctly please," said Anne in her cruel overly demanding as usual voice. She dumped her load outside the stairwell and looked at Will with a get-to-work-right-now-or-die expression.

"Of course," Will cleared his throat, "we've wasted enough time (and DragonQuester has wasted enough really bad jokes). Senel, take the food bag out of Moses' hand and push him into a cart. Everyone else pick a carriage and get in it." Will began picking up luggage as Senel wrestled the food out of Moses' firm, but drugged, hands. It took a good few minutes of grunting, drugged cursing, and hitting to finally recover the half eaten food. The otters split, Poppo and Pippo awkwardly stepping up the carriage side steps into Mr. Dick's coach, and Quppo sulking over to Mr. Rick's.

"Let's go with the nice man, C," said Shirley as she took the hand of her friend and began dragging Chloe to Mr. Rick's waiting carriage. Senel shoved Moses into Mr. Dick's coach then left to climb after Shirley and Chloe in the other gig. Norma and Noyem walked off, talking animatedly, towards Mr. Dick's coach.

Jay saw this as a well needed, well wanted, well _really_ wanted, opportunity to spend more time with Shirley and ride in the carriage with normal people. Moses, Norma, and Noyem were all in one carriage and when Will finished Jay assumed he would join them to keep that zany bunch under control. Leaving Jay with Shirley. It was a perfect plan.

Jay began walking to the carriage held open by British little Mr. Rick, until Jay felt a hand, no a claw, latch onto his shoulder. The grip was cold and sinister, like the evil hand of death or maybe some really old person who smells like they should be dead. Jay remembered this grip. It was the grip of fear. The grip of pain. The grip he felt before 55 cc's of _I Can't Believe It's Not Dead!_ tranquilizer was shot into him. The grip of feared Little Orphan Annie.

"Jay, if you could spare a minute, please?" Even when Anne added 'please' to her request it still sounded like the harsh bark of a command. Anne kept her grip on Jay's shoulder and pushed him away from the busy activity of the carriages. Anne pushed Jay to the front of the empty house beside the Lanrich's home. They were only a few feet away from everyone else, but the isolated building made it seem as if it were only Jay and Anne. Anne took her arm off Jay's shoulder.

"Jay, I have something I want to tell you." Anne's hard gray eyes looked up at Jay. Jay couldn't help but feel horribly uncomfortable, even more uncomfortable than when the midget driver was staring at him. Anne wasn't necessarily what you would call a beauty. Her cheek bones were too high and straight and her black hair looked greasy to the touch. Anne's skin was between being green and tan and despite her small stature her muscles stood out in sinewy branches. But despite all the imperfections, Anne held an unquestionable beauty about her. An unquestionable beauty brought on by her harsh persona. But Anne's typical facade had vanished as she looked at Jay with her stone eyes filled with...pity.

"Jay the Unseen...I was afraid the rumors I've heard were true."

_"That's the name I used as an information dealer on the Legacy..."_ Jay darted looks at the surrounding scenery to make sure no one was close enough to hear. Then he whispered, barely audible, "How do you know that name? And what rumors are you talking about?"

Anne kept looking at Jay with sympathetic eyes. "If you keep your ears open at the right times, you learn more than you need to. But at this moment that doesn't matter. What does matter is that you protect yourself, at any cost."

Jay smiled. He thought that one of the Lanrich siblings would talk to him about this. "Are you trying to tell me to protect Noyem? Don't worry, Anne, everyone, me, Senel, Moses, will protect her-"

"This isn't about Noyem," hissed Anne impatiently. "This is more important than that ditz! There are people that want you, not her."

"People like Wyllon? That fool will be easy to finish. You're taking you're simple warning too seriously," said Jay, still smiling. _"She must have found out my name from someone else who visited the Legacy,"_ thought Jay. _"And now she's trying to prepare me before going to Mercy's."_

Anne sighed with the pity in her gray eyes. "You're not the same as they described. Your life has become simple, so your wariness from before has worn off... I guess even assassins can adept to a normal life."

Assassin. The word froze Jay's blood. Anne wasn't just giving Jay a friendly warning.

"You can forget about your past, Jay, but your past doesn't forget about you," whispered Anne. "It isn't coincidence that has brought you here, it isn't even Noyem who has brought you here." Anne smiled sadly, her eyes dull. "I'm sorry I can't finish, but your friends have been waiting too long."

Jay felt his brain pull out of an uncomfortable fuzziness. What Anne said had been too strange, too startling, too..._did she pull that quote out of some movie?_

Anne put a sympathetic hand on Jay's shoulder. "I know you have questions, but you must go-"

"AnnieLannie, have you been hogging Jay-Boy this whole time? Well, give him a goodbye kiss and shove him in here, we need to go!" Noyem hung out an open window in Mr. Dick's carriage. Mr. Dick was tapping his fingers impatiently against his horse's reins with his stout behind on the driver's seat. Noyem waved her hands. "C'mon, Jay! There's enough room in here for one more, there's a pretty little seat right next to _me_."

Jay's eye twitched. Not only had he been freaked out by Anne's 'cryptic' message, but he had missed his perfect, great, superb, once-in-a-pale-freak's-lifetime chance to sit next to Shirley. Instead he had to sit...with...oh, why were the fates so cruel?...with Noyem. Noyem and Norma and, the probably still drugged with _I Can't Believe It's Not Dead!_ tranquilizer, Moses. And t/ top it off, his driver was the smoking, British street talking, mean looking midget Mr. Dick.

"Lucky you, Jay," shouted Senel from his seat in Mr. Rick's gig beside Will and across from Shirley. "e3BYou get to ride in the fun carriage."

"Lucky, lucky, me," grumbled Jay.

---------------------------------------------------

Sway to the left, sway to the right, sway to the left, sway to the right...Jay squeezed his eyes shut ...sway to the left, sway to the right, sway to the left, sway to the right...A ship could sway less in a storm...sway to the left, sway to the right, sway to the left, sway to the right...Jay's stomach clenched...sway to the left, sway to the right, sway to the left, sway to the right...Good thing Jay hadn't eaten anything in the last 9 or so hours...sway to the left, sway to the right, sway to the left, sway to right...The smell from the bag was delicious, yet nauseating...sway to the left, sway to the right, sway to the left, sway to the right...But what was more nauseating was watching Norma, Noyem, Moses, Pippo, and Poppo eat so much food while the entire carriage lurched from left to right, right to left, left to right, in such a way that could drive anyone insane! Or in**z**ane! Or crazy! Or worse! Or like me! Muhaheheahehehehe...

"JJ, you okay? Looks like you just saw a ghost or Michael Jackson's Neverland," said Norma. She bit into a donut and, from her seat diagonal from Jay's, kicked his leg with the toe of her boot.

Jay bolted and took his arm off the window pane he had been clinging to. "Ow!" With his eyes off the window the wobbling of the carriage seemed less queasy. But that didn't help Jay with the sudden pain from Norma's harsh trademark kick. Jay put a hand around his injured ankle. "You didn't have to kick me that hard."

"But.." Moses paused to swallow and rip out another bite of bacon, "...you looked..." pause, bite, swallow, "...like you were about..." another bite, munch, swallow, "...to heave chunks," finished Moses, finally, after eating two practically foot long strips of bacon. Moses had fully recovered from his lethal tranquilizer dosage after minutes of being tossed into the carriage. And, as a result from being under the influence of Anne's special tranquilizer, Moses had completely lost the memory of his past actions, i.e., drooling in Norma's hair and eating half the bag of Senel's group food.

Jay noticed his seat lurching more than usual. He looked to his right to see Noyem moving the carriage from her giggling. "I didn't know Jay-Boy could get motion sickness," she snickered. _"Who wouldn't in this horrible thing?!"_ thought Jay while he threw Noyem a shut-the-MJ Neverland-up look.

"Jay gets motion sickness easily," said Poppo from his spot in Norma's lap. "Remember that time when ,you, Pippo asked him to help with repairing the gears controlling the heating system for the cave?"

"Uh-huh," nodded Pippo as he sat down more comfortably in the area between Jay and Noyem's seats. "The gears started spinning while Jay was still on it and it kept going round and round. Then I noticed this green stuff shooting into the air from the gears and-"

"No one needs to know the rest," said Jay in a tone he rarely ever used on the Oresoren. Pippo gulped and hid his face behind his paws.

"Aw, I think it's cute how shorty Jay has a weakness," smiled Moses. He popped the lid off a water bottle he pulled from the brown lunch bag and gulped down the liquid deeply. He placed the bottle down and smiled wider, tapping a finger to his head. "So how could we all exploit this weakness? Hmmmmm..."

"Wow, you used a big boy word, Moses. 'Exploit,' did you learn it from your special classes or did you, after years of hearing it, finally understand its meaning?" quipped Jay, but not in the way he usually did. Jay almost sounded cruel saying it. But Moses reacted in his usual manner. By throwing more insults. Soon both Jay and Moses were at each other's throat, insulting height, ethnic background, hygiene, and individual intelligence.

"Men, men, men. Relax. Don't you know it's rude to argue in front of dignified ladies?" Noyem set her back straighter. She gave Moses and Jay a fake haughty look from her joking amber eyes. Norma mimicked Noyem and put a finger to her lip before saying, "Such acts of violence scare us!" Moses and Jay halted in mid-punching action. They stared at each other before staring at Norma and Noyem. "You two are dignified?" asked Jay and Moses at the exact same time.

The inside of the lively carriage had a simple, but comfortable set up. The seats were blue comfy cushions that sprung whenever someone shifted their weight. The windows on the right and left were large enough to stick yourself out of and only a small latch kept them locked. The floorboard was cramped, though, no one had enough foot room. Also the motion of the two horses pulling the carriage made traveling a queasy experience. Adding to the uncomfortable assents was a thin black sliding cover that separated Mr. Dick from the passengers. By itself the cover was harmless, but with Mr. Dick on the other side, opening it whenever he wanted, made traveling in the carriage a lot worse.

"What the hell are you doing back there?!" roared Mr. Dick, violently sliding the cover. He glared at the group. Moses and Jay were standing on their seats, Moses bending over because of low head room, Jay just standing because the headroom was exactly his size. Both were still frozen in their fighting position. "Stay in your seats or I'll throw you out, you stupid bunch of misfits!" finished Mr. Dick. The cover slid back abruptly, leaving Moses, Jay, Pippo, Poppo, Norma, and Noyem alone again.

"What's his problem?" asked Norma after Moses and Jay had flopped back down into their seats.

"He's always been like that ever since I met him," said Noyem. "Some people just can't change. Like Makoto for example. Poor guy, he'll be after balls instead of boobs for the rest of his life..." Noyem sighed like saying that had caused her to become empathetic. "Such a pity too. He's too hot to be gay."

Norma nodded in agreement. "You got that right. Are you sure he can't be brought to the other side?"

"Positive, the force is too strong within him," answered Noyem sagely. "No persuasion can bring him to our side."

Jay sighed miserably. Either Noyem and Norma had watched StarWars too many times, or a force out there really did cause people to be gay (which would explain many, many things). "Why are women so weird, Moses?" Jay turned to his older, not really wise but somewhat in specific areas, brother for guidance.

"Hehehehe, Noyem said 'boobs,' " ...that was all Moses could say as a reply.

Jay sighed even more miserably and slammed his head on the window pane. Mr. Rick's carriage was right beside them, so Jay could see what was going on inside the carriage with 'normal people' in it. Senel, Will, and Chloe were laughing apparently at something Shirley had said. Shirley was blushing and smiling her gorgeous smile. Quppo was sitting on her lap dozing as Shirley absentmindedly stroked his back.

_"Lucky Quppo..."_

"Jay-Boy...what'cha doin? Huh? Why are you looking at Blondie, huh? I'm right here and you're paying attention to a girl so far away... "

Jay jumped from his seat and flattened himself against the window. Jay touched his burning right ear, the ear Noyem had been whispering in. Noyem was resting her head on her hands, lying across the blue cushion seat. Pippo, whom Jay had deliberately placed between himself and Noyem as a barrier, was between Moses and Norma. All three, and Poppo, were looking on curiously.

"Noyem, what the hell do you think you're doing?" asked Jay still pressing himself paper flat against the window. Noyem stayed comfortable in her position, looking at Jay with her eyes half opened.

"Nuthing," answered Noyem sleepily. Then she began crawling towards Jay. "It's just that I'm soooo bored and you look so cute sitting there all depressed. And I have a perfect way to cure both my boredom and your depression..."

"Go away," warned Jay slowly as he stuck his foot out to keep Noyem from crawling closer. Noyem grinned wolfishly and pushed his leg down while talking in a low lascivious manner.

"So widdle Jay-Boy has a cute widdle stomach problem. I wonder if he has a cute little turn on? Maybe it's nibbling on his ear, tickling his back, talking dirty, or... maybe you're turned on by stomach problems. Do you want me to throw up on you?" Noyem was on her knees with her hand along Jay's back. Her 'chest' was a bit too firmly pressed against him. "So Jay-Boy, what turns you on, huh?"

"A lot of what you said earlier turned me on," commented Moses like a student watching an interesting documentary making observations. Norma smacked him with the back of her hand and shushed him, like she was a moviegoer watching an interesting movie, silencing someone who had interrupted the best part.

Noyem either ignored them or liked the attention. She slid her hands further down Jay's back. "Just tell me when I've hit the mark, kay, Jay-Boy?"

Jay thought back to a few nights ago, that seemed like such a long time to him now, when Jay had first met Noyem. Jay had ACCIDENTLY fallen on Noyem. In defense, Noyem had kicked Jay off by placing her foot on his stomach and pushing him away. As a result Jay had flown across the room. Jay wondered if that same strategy would work again but vice versa. The area was smaller and the carriage would probably rock from the impact. Not to mention Mr. Dick would probably scream his midget head off...but it was either that or lose his purity. To Noyem. In a carriage.

Jay knew which choice he would have to make.

Within seconds Noyem had launched from her position on Jay to the other side of the carriage. The carriage was knocked off its wheels, precariously balancing on its right side. The horses' whinny sounded for an instant before a whip could be heard cracking against their backs. The black cover was slipped open once again, this time it was almost torn off. "What the hell are you doing now?!" thundered Mr. Dick, red in his overly chubby face.

"Just having fun," insisted Norma happily as she reached over and shut the cover herself. Then she knelt on the floorboard and put a hand on Noyem's shoulder. She began shaking Noyem. "Yammy, Yammy! Speak to me! Yammy!"

"Ow...ch..." breathed Noyem. "Jay-Boy...sure acts hard to get." She straightened herself out of her crumbled postion and rubbed her sore head. "You could have pushed me off, Jay. No, you had to kick me clear across the freaking carriage!"

"Yeah, Jay!" said Pippo in defense. "That was mean!" "Yeah!" agreed Poppo. "She was just acting nice! We disown you, Jay!" "We know no Jay," said Pippo.

"Yeah, Noyem was acting...really nice," sighed Moses dreamily. Then he shook his head sadly and patted Jay's shoulder. "You poor boy, no girl will probably ever do that to you again."

"Shut up, Moses," mumbled Jay.

The next hours passed on with everyone still commenting on Noyem and Jay's behavior. Norma couldn't believe that Noyem could act so sexy and demanded that she be taught the ways of the wanton. Moses couldn't believe that none of those 'positions' and 'dirty talking' had turned Jay on. Moses commented that he had been panting in his seat. Noyem thanked him for the kind comment. Pippo and Poppo completely ignored Jay and whenever Jay tried to talk to them they simply pouted and turned the other way. They told Moses to tell Jay that they weren't going to speak to him ever again unless he apologized to 'sweet little Noyem.' Jay just decided to never talk to them ever again. Hearing that the otters panicked and decided to go back on the deal, choosing Jay's companionship over Noyem's hurt feelings (and even more hurt skull.

Finally after a few hours Norma interrupted Noyem's sermon on '_How to Sexy Talk while Sexy Walk_.' "Hey, where are we? It's past noon and we've been in here since 5 am. Are we close to JJ's Momma's house yet?"

Jay stopped eating the remaining food Moses, Norma, and Noyem had unexpectedly saved for him (Jay was finally past the motion sickness). He peered out the window with his half-eaten apple pastry in his hand. The passing scenery was completely different than the dull street the group had left hours before. The Victiorian style buildings shone off the bright sun's rays that hung overhead in a light blue sky. People bustled on the sides of the street wearing beatuiful different hues of clothing. Women walked along, heels snapping against the clean cobblestone, with sweeping dresses hovering above the ground. Men held their heads up with every step, their black coats and jackets trailing behind them. Children skipped alongside their parents, laughing and giggling and looking for a chance to escape their parent's eye for at least a second. The center of the street was a mass of black carriages either going forward or turning back. Horses trotted briskly with drivers slapping the reins against their necks. Jay looked for the carriage belonging to Mr. Rick but couldn't differentiate one carriage among seemingly thousands of others. But along with carriages traveling on the road, there was another type of transportation Jay had never seen driving by. No horse pulled it, but it was the same black color and had the same large wheels of a horse drawn coach. No driver sat outside the cart and smoke snaked out from a pipe on the back of it. Jay watched the new vehicles pass by curiously. He knew Gadoria was on the verge of an industrial revolution, factories could be seen dotting the background of the city. And a key detail was that the only people walking along were wealthy people. No poor people slumped in the background of the street. Jay could guess that the city had taken them away, to work as low paid workers to build machines to keep up with the city's higher born growth.

Jay yawned loudly. Thinking about work reminded him of how little sleep he had gotten the night before. Beside him he heard Noyem yawn. Then in the chain reaction Norma yawned, then Moses.

"Geez, I forgot how tired I am," said Moses. He settled in deeper in his seat and took off his golden monocle. He placed it on the armstand and laid his head against his shoulder. "If ya'll don't mind, I'm gonna take a nap."

"That doesn't sound so bad," added Norma. She took Pippo in her arms. She snuggled against him like one would with a plush toy. "Wake me up whenever we get to..." Norma interrupted herself with a long, exhausted snore.

"You lazy butts sleep," said Noyem. She gathered Poppo in her arms and looked out through her window. "I'm going to keep an eye out."

Jay leaned his head against his seat. Everyone nodding off made him feel even more tired. He looked once more out the window and let his eyelids droop. As he began to fall asleep, a sudden thought passed his mind. _'You can forget about your past, Jay, but your past doesn't forget about you.'_ Jay turned over so he wasn't facing the pane of the window. He let his eyes close while he stared at the fabric of the seat cushion. _"How could anyone know about my past? It's gone, not forgotten."_ Jay's eyes fell shut and he went into a deep, deep, sleep.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

_The rain splattered against the tiles of the roof, each droplet splitting and flowing down in rivulets. Each droplet of water melted into the other before touching the ground, creating a quiet symphony of falling liquid beads. The whole rain itself held a thin haze over the pitch black night. The sky had just split into the slow shower, but everything was already slick to the touch._

_Jay didn't dare let go of his handhold, a wet tile that dared to slip under his grip. The house he was on was old, as was every other building in the district, and the soft wind of the storm caused the three story structure to shudder. Jay was perched on the right side under the outline of a balcony, the side closest to the alley. His legs were lengthen out to the edge of the second story roof, holding his entire body in a strenuous leg muscle stretch. Jay had been there for half an hour, but he didn't show any signs of movement. He was completely motionless, even his breathing couldn't be seen or heard._

_All he had to do was wait a little longer..._

_Faint footsteps could be heard echoing against the walls. They could be heard rounding a corner to enter the deepest part of the alley. The footsteps were quick and paced; whoever it was, was in a hurry. But the footsteps were too quick; whoever it was, was afraid of the unseen entities that could almost be sensed in the cold air._

_Jay didn't need to wait anymore._

_In complete silence, Jay slid down from his hiding place and landed on the mud and dirt of the alley. His falling made the softest of sounds but Jay held his breath as he quickly darted into the empty space between two buildings._

_The footsteps stopped. The form of a person could be seen as a shade through the veil of rain. It was a thin, shaky man. He thought he had heard a very faint noise, nothing too significant, but that was enough to make him wary of continuing forward. But the center of the backstreets was the meeting place, he couldn't possibly stop now. He stuck a quivering hand into his grey coat. Just feeling the weight in his hands made him feel confident enough to keep going. A few more steps forward and everything that he had been told would be just fine._

_A few more steps and Jay would be ready to do what he had to._

_The quick footsteps started again. This time slower, more deliberately. The man kept his hand in his coat, scratching against the surface of the weight. He was close to the meeting point. How foolish, the man thought he was, to get so worked up over a little sound._

_Finally Jay was ready. He reached for the dagger at his side and griped it so that it could scarcely be seen in his hand. Jay stepped out of the cover of the houses and into the open alleyway. He griped his dagger harder as he looked at the back of the thin, shaky man. The man had definitely heard Jay's footsteps this time. He began turning his trembling head to look behind him._

_Before the man could even complete that action, Jay had rushed forward and put the dagger to his neck. In a single stroke Jay slit the man's throat._

_The blood didn't even spew; it flowed down the man's chest along with the rain. When Jay felt that it had been finished he took his dagger back and let the body fall to the ground. The crevice in the middle of the blade captured the blood and ran it off the tip. Red droplets hung off the edges of it. Jay leaned down and wiped his blade off on the man's coat, careful not to make the stain look too out of place. When it was discovered, or if it was discovered in the abandoned alley, people would think the man was attacked by an animal. Jay knew how to cover up his actions._

_Suddenly a hand grasped Jay's wrist. It was pale and shaking violently in the small puddle of blood that pooled around it._

_The man wasn't dead, yet. He was on the point where it was impossible to save life, but he had enough of it left to move for a few seconds longer. Jay tried to pull his hand away, but the man held a grasp as impenetrable as the grasp of death over himself. With the other hand, the man took out the weight from his coat pocket. In the small sliver of the crescent moon, Jay could make out what the object was. A gleam shone off its metallic surface and danced off in the dark night. In the man's bloodied, shaking hand was a gun._

_The man tried to mouth something but his white lips couldn't form the words. So the man just raised the gun and with his quivering hand pointed it at Jay. Jay felt his heart accelerate as he looked into the black eyes of the pistol. But Jay didn't let any emotion show on his face. Fear was pointless. Fear would only cloud up his mind. The man began pulling the trigger. His hand was shaking horribly. His whole body began shaking horribly. The hand clutched to Jay's wrist began weakening its hold, at the exact moment as the finger began pulling the trigger farther back. Jay felt the grip weakened, and without hesitation, yanked himself out of the man's hold. Then Jay moved out of the gun's path swiftly and kicked the gun out of the man's hands._

_The pistol clattered away uselessly on the muddied pavement._

_The man let out a last quivering shake that raked through his body. His eyes rolled back and his hands went limp. And finally, he died. Jay watched the man succumb to the fate Jay had caused him to face. It was over. Jay had accomplished what he had been sent to do. A well worked machine, like the gun still clattering down the alley, had carried out a task that its master had ordered it to do. Jay lifted his head and scoped the dark alley. Jay hadn't sensed anyone else following the man. No shapes shifted in the shadows, no heartbeat could be detected. So the man hadn't hired anyone to cover him. How foolish. Jay took his dagger out and inspected the body carefully. Jay knew the man was dead but he didn't want to be surprised again. The body's skin was completely cold, from the slowly falling rain and the lack of warm blood. Good, thoroughly dead. No more surprises._

_Silence fell over the alleyway. An unnatural silence._

_Jay looked up. It was strange; he could feel that something was missing. An uncanny feeling told him that something wasn't right. But what could be missing in an uninhabited alleyway? Nothing was there already, nothing that could be seen. Or heard._

_The pistol, it had stopped clattering._

_With the strength Jay had kicked it with the gun should have kept going until it hit a wall or finally lost momentum from the powerful lash. But it was too early for it to lose momentum and the sound of metal hitting against a hard surface hadn't rung out. Someone had taken up the gun. Jay backed away with his dagger, still bloody, in his left hand. He watched the area where the pistol had slid towards. He kept his dagger low, in case he needed to make a quick slash across the newcomer's throat. How could Jay have not felt the presence a body gave off? Jay was too well trained to let a simple pedestrian pass by without notice. Whoever had stopped the gun was as well trained as Jay._

_"Haven't you been taught the guidelines yet, Jay? Or does that idiot keep you locked away in a closet then take you out when he needs to? Wait, forget I said that, it has a gross double meaning." A man in clothing as dark as the night itself appeared seemingly out of nowhere. He tossed something out of hands. "Here, Jay, you dropped this. Remember to never leave a weapon out. Don't know when an enemy will take it." The gun fell near Jay's feet with a hard 'clank'_

_No emotion showed on Jay's face as he looked at the arrival. But recognition from that uppity deep voice stirred him enough to speak. "I was warned to never to speak to you again, Hieu."_

_"Oh really?" Hieu stepped closer to Jay and let down his hood. In the darkness Jay could still see the features of Hieu's face. His jaw was square with set light blue eyes. Most of his hair had been shaved away. There was only a knot of silver hair that hung from a line that went straight down the middle of his head. "But I thought we were friends, Jay. Don't let that half witted Solon get the better of you with his words. Anyway, how long has it been? Haven't seen you since you were four foot. Now you're...four foot and an inch. My, how kids grow." Hieu cocked a smile from his thin line of a mouth. It was difficult for Hieu to smile. A large scar separated the right side of his lip from the other. The scar began at the end of his nose and ended at his chin. The portion under the lip had been a particularly bad cut, stitches held together the broken skin. Red tissue could still be seen underneath the wire._

_"Solon will not tolerate your presence here," spoke Jay monotonously. He picked up the gun and placed it in the dagger holster strapped to his leg._

_"Solon doesn't give a rat's ass. But alas I have to see that asshole tonight. Need to have a chat with old Solon. Had to miss work to come all the way out here. But this matter is very important." Hieu strode towards Jay. He put his arms on Jay's shoulders. "It involves you. And all your other ninja friends."_

_"I'll take you to Solon, then, after I finish this." Jay turned and bent again to the corpse of the man. He took his dagger and began cutting wild but patterned slashes on the man's shirt and chest._

_"Who's the lucky one there? One slice and you killed him nicely. Usually takes my trainees a couple of swings before they hit an artery. And from the behind too." Hieu kicked at the dead man's head. It rolled over, the eyes staring directly where Jay was crouched, masking his attack. "You're good, Jay," whistled Hieu. "But who is he?" Hieu kicked the dead man's head again._

_"A royal messenger for the Crusand Empire. The prince of Crusand is trying to keep up a blockade off the coast of Gadoria's main port. This man was to deliver the strategies to keep the blockade up to Crusand's navy generals. Solon sent the man an offer though, give up the strategies for money. He agreed and then I was sent in for the rest," Jay informed bluntly._

_"Been doing your homework, Jay? So Solon's siding with Gadoria for once. Last month it was Crusand. That idiot just likes keeping the fire brewing." Hieu bent down and reached into the man's coat. Papers were rolled up in tight bundles. Hieu chuckled and placed them back in. "You couldn't have been told all that. If Solon finds out that you got information on you, he'll be as mad as hell. Although that fool is always as mad as hell..." Hieu put his hands on his knees and stood up gradually like an elderly man would. "Well, finish up quickly. I want to get out of this rain." Hieu shivered as a blast of wind beat down harder than the soft gusts of before. The storm was beginning to turn fierce._

_Jay stood up and slid his dagger down next to the gun in the holster. "We can leave now."_

_"Goodie, now take me to that son of a mutt."_

_Jay led Hieu out of the winding streets of the alley and towards the more lively (ha, unintended pun) part of town. No one was out but guards posted out among streets. They stood statue still outside the town's entrance, in case an attack came from the warring country. Jay and Hieu slipped past the guards and into the forest beside the town's front wall. Jay didn't slow down in his hurried dash of mad speed to ever check on Hieu. Hieu was able to keep up fine in the foreign surroundings._

_During their run Hieu kept talking. "Want to know how I found you? Well, I found that shaky little excuse for a messenger back there and noticed a haunted look in his eye. And I know that haunted look, the look someone has after seeing Solon's pug ugly face! HA!" Hieu crackled in laughter. Pulling the stitches on his lips even farther apart. "After trailing him for awhile I picked up your energy. You keep it well hidden but someone like me could pick up a taste of it. You've come a long way, Jay."_

_During the whole run Jay remained absolutely silent._

_The rain had picked up and began coming down in sheets once Jay had halted outside an abandoned building. A tiny chapel that had been burned years ago in a violent fire. Strangely, the chapel's bell tower looked untouched by flames._

_Hieu furled his upper lip when he saw Jay approach the weather beaten door. "You're all staying in a church? I thought churches were too pure for demons."_

_Jay didn't reply as he undid the bolt in the door. He put both hands on the door and pushed it open._

_Moonlight filtered in from small holes in the ceiling, but lighted candles lit up most of the dreary insides of the chapel. At first glance the church looked devoid of life; scattered, broken pews laid everywhere, vines curled in from smashed windows, and the once wooden floor had been reduced to dirt. It looked like nothing more than an old cathedral that someone had chosen to light the remaining candles for. But subtle changes had been made. Some areas of dirt were bare, no plants, broken glass, or wood chips covered the areas. Those areas were resting places for the assassins living there, for the moment._

_A figure stirred at the head of the pulpit. It had been bending over reading a faded newspaper. In the candlelight only its hands could be seen. It stirred its shadowed head when Jay and Hieu entered. The newspaper was delicately put under the pulpit. The hands folded together and a thoughtful cruel voice broke through the church's atmosphere. "Look what the cat dragged in."_

_"Master," Jay swallowed before continuing. Now he was showing fear. "Hieu asked me to lead him here. He-"_

_"Shut up and come here," ordered Solon, his hands still not moving from their spot. Jay obliged and tripped his way towards the steps of the pulpit. He went and stood with his back at the wall, to the right of Solon. Solon took no further notice of Jay and angled his eyes to Hieu. Hieu was standing near the door looking about the church like a not too curious tourist._

_"Hieu, why what a pleasant surprise it is to see you," said Solon with false camaraderie._

_"Solon, why there you are. Couldn't see you in all this ugly dust and gloom. You blended right in." Hieu smiled the stitch wrenching grin. He began walking forward lazily. "But enough formal greetings. I guess you know why I'm here?"_

_The upper part of Solon's lip twitched. His sunken eyes closed to open again, with more malice in them than before. "Of course. Your trail is board enough for a limping monkey to follow." Solon paused before delivering his next statement. "You want to stop me from going to the Legacy."_

_"Correct, Solon. You always were to smart for your own good. But what gets me is why does a smart man like yourself want to take on something so suicidal?" Hieu clicked his tongue against the top of his mouth, making a 'tsk tsk' sound. "When I worked under you it seemed like things always made sense. Now, though, all of your moves seem so pointless."_

_"What I plan to do will not be 'pointless,'" Solon hissed. "The single person who escaped my hold deserves his death. He is far too powerful to keep alive." Solon unfolded his hands. His thin pale fingers grasped the end of the worn podium in suppressed rage. Jay watched this from afar. He had never heard of someone running away from Solon. It was either live out a restricted life or die. And Solon liked it that way. "He has too valuable information anyway," Solon went on. "If it gets in the hands of an enemy some lives could be at risk."_

_"Like you care about lives. You're just mad because he outsmarted you and now that you've found his whereabouts you want to kill him. You're really too predictable." Hieu made the pity 'tsk tsk' sound again. Then he smiled. "But I know that whatever I say won't stop you brazen fool from going. I'm here instead to offer up...an agreement."_

_Solon raised his eyebrows in mock surprise. "Really? Then do go on." Solon's hand swept back into their folded position._

_Without Solon's arms covering the back of the podium, Jay was able to see the newspaper tucked away in the first shelf. It was from Gadoria and looked to be at least a few months old. Stamped out on the single sheet with bold letters was the headline: 'Widow Gives Up Proud Family Name.'_

_"I...will join the attack," said Hieu stoically. "But for only one purpose."_

_This caught Solon's interest. Hieu was a valuable assassin. Especially with his abnormal extra talent. "And the purpose is...?"_

_"You give me Jay and a few other of your little ninjas. Or in fact..." Hieu smirked. His grotesque scar splitting far enough to show the pulsing skin tissue beneath. "...just give me Jay."_

_Solon barked out laughing in a piercing burst. "Why would you want this brat?" Solon took Jay by roughly by the head and pulled him forward. He kept a hand tightly against Jay's head. "He's possibly the worst I've had to train yet! Constantly whining and crying. He's almost useless!"_

_Hieu's eyes almost seemed to soften before he spoke. The scar closing as Hieu opened his mouth to talk softly. "He doesn't belong with you Solon, that's why."_

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Jay bolted awake. He looked around, seeing that he was in the safety of the crowded little carriage. Jay put his hand to his forehead. _"Just a dream..."_ He looked out the carriage window. The sun was sinking towards the western part of the sky. The memory of Hieu surfaced recollections that Jay would have preferred to keep under. Jay had seen Hieu fall in the brutal attack...just before Solon grabbed Jay and threw him in as a shield to escape.

There was a murmuring coming from beside Jay. He looked over to his right so see Noyem curled up asleep. Poppo was under her head, as a brown furry pillow. Her eyes were fluttering in her sleep, a sign that she was having a dream herself.

Jay poked her in the arm. "Noyem, wake up. The carriage is slowing down. We must be close to...Noyem, just wake up." Jay kept poking her until finally he resorted to the most probable solution in the situation.

"NOYEM! OH MY GOD! GIANT SHRIMP PEOPLE ARE ATTACKING THIS GOOD LOOKING BUNCH OF GUYS! MAKOTO IS THERE TOO! HE'S BEING EATEN BY...um...A GIANT RED LOBSTER! HELP!"

"Where, where, where?" Noyem sprang up, knocking Poppo to the ground. She looked around frantically. "Where's the guys? Where's Makoto?" Poppo rubbed his eyes on the floor and asked sleepily. "Where the shrimp and lobster?"

"Where' what?" asked Jay innocently.

After a few moments of sleepy blinking Noyem finally understood what Jay had done. "You freaky MJ look-a-like, you ruined my dream! There were chocolate rainbows and chocolate clouds with chocolate trees and banana chocolate muffins with sugar. And there were cute men prancing in the chocolate meadows with chocolate ponytails...I mean chocolate, um..." Noyem shook her head. "Never mind."

Jay rolled his eyes. "Sorry I interrupted," he said without being sorry at all. "I thought you would be able to tell me if we're close or not." The carriage was on what seemed to be a private road. Mr. Rick's carriage was lined up behind them. There seemed to be a weird gut feeling turning inside Jay, like he should know where they are.

Noyem rolled over and grabbed Poppo off the floor. "I don't care, I just want a few more minutes of sleep..." Then Noyem stifled a yawn and reentered her chocolate and men filled dream.

Jay glanced out his window again. Farther ahead he could see a gate standing in the road. Jay squinted to see better. The gate was covered in chains, but not literally covered in them. The chains were a pattern on the gate. Golden replicas as decorations that sat along with the metal bars. At seeing them Jay looked down at his sleeve. His chains were in the same pattern as the gate's.

Without being told, Jay knew they were there.

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AFTERWORD: SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SORRY EVERYONE! I have been so lazy over this Thanksgiving break! I had to go shopping with Mom for Thanksgiving dinner (genetically transmuted cow taste just like turkey) and then deal with...shiver...grandparents. But I know what you're thinking. "But DragonQuester you had all those other weeks to write too!" Well, you're probably not really thinking that because you're not really reading this...but to answer your question little person in my head I was busy with school. The horrible thing had taken over my mind...and the scary part was...that it wasn't all that horrible. Lori (the leader of my social group: The Anime Freaks or better know as Those People Who Read Those Backwards Books and Laugh at Nothing All the Time) has finally accepted boys into out inner circle. Hallelujah! HALLELUJAH! Although their pasty skinned freaks who probably don't even have balls but hey, losers can't be choosers. ANYWAYS, I was going to Drama class one day (yes, I'm a drama nerd, hail Shakesbeard) and my drama teacher, Mrs. Moustache to keep her idenity safe, gave out the most hell bent project of all time:

Sewing.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I HATE SEWING I HATE SEWING I HATE SEWING! STUFF FIRE IN MY EYES! I HATE SEWING! Anyways, we have to make a puppet and in order to do that I have to SEW. I. Hate. Sewing. And that is totally ignoring the fact that I suck at it.

Jay: Bad at writing and sewing. Wow, you gotz no skillz.

Me: YES I DO!!! I gotz skillz!

Jay: What? Burping your ABC's?

Me: (Mumble how did he know? mumble) I can...play video games for ninety-nine hours straight without suffering long term eye damage!

Jay: Really?

Me: Yeah, once I get by the burning pain in my left pupil I'm just fine.

Well, along with the burning pain in my left eye I also have the pain of feeling horrible. I let all forty or less of you down. And since I killed my guilty conscience years ago I guess I'll pretend I have one by writing a shorty.  
Tag, You're It

(Moses walks up to a can of Tag Bodyspray) Moses: MUHAHAHA! With this, all women everywhere will find me irresistable! (gets the Tag Bodyspray and sprays it in his armpits)

Chloe: You're as irresistible as a old man in a frat house. In fact- (sniff sniff) Mmmmm, what smells so good?

Norma: (sniff) I think it's Red.

Shirley: (sniff) Suddenly I want to...hug him.

Chloe: NO! My body isn't listening to me! It's going towards Moses! Someone stop me!!

Moses: MUHAHAHA! My plan is working all the babes want me! YAY!

Norma: Wait a minute, Noyem isn't reacting to the spray.

Noyem: Huh? Oh Moses has Tag Bodyspray on? Sorry, I have an immunity to it.

(Jay walks up while Shirley, Norma, and Chloe all jump on Moses. Looks at the Tag Bodyspray)Jay: What's this?

Noyem: Oh..it's, um, super MJ defying potion. Spray it on and everyone will stop calling you MJ Jr.

Jay: Okay (sprays it in his eye) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT BURNS!

Noyem: Oh Jay! You smell so good! Let me hug you! (throws herself on Jay)

Jay: MY EYE IS MELTING IN ITS SOCKET!

Noyem: You must have sprayed yourself to attract me! Aw, you're so sweet, Jay!

Jay: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THE HORRIFIC PAIN! MY EYE IS DYING!

And that's why you should never buy Tag Bodyspray, kids, thank you. Anyways, I have an important note to say. The real reason this came out late is because something was wrong with my account on For four days I wasn't able to log in and then the next day I wasn't able to post any documents. If a problem like that ever happens again I will alert all forty or less of you by...and this is gonna be lame...by posting a review. I can't think of any other way and I don't have all forty or less of you's email adress. And using up a whole chapter to say I'm gonna be late on the next chapter is really kinda lame too. So if you don't see a chapter for awhile go to reviews and check to see if there are any messages from me. Hopefully I won't have to use because now I'm gonna try to post these chapters up every two weeks or so. Thanks, and since I still feel really bad about being late here's a mini story I made up when I was burning all of my sewing equipment.

Fairy Tale Most Foul...And Gay

Once upon a time in a land we'll never know, because the damn government ruined the enviorment, there was a boy named Makoto. Makoto was a very sweet boy. He cleaned up after himself and never complained when the village idiot threw crap on him. But when Makoto started going through something called puberty, (you know, that thing we all want but once we get it, it sucks), he began to change. Superly change. One day, when Makoto was strolling down the street he noticed two magazines laying on the ground. One was labled PlayBoy (you know, the one with those pictures of women you wish you could be) and the other PlayGirl (you know, the one that you keep under your bed). Makoto noticed that he liked staring at PlayGirl more than PlayBoy. ThAt WaSn'T rIgHt! Then Makoto realized it, he was homosexual! Makoto hurried home to his sister.

"Sister, sister!" he cried. "I have a problem!"

Anne stopped refilling her tubes of _I Can't Believe It IS Dead!_ tranquilizer. "You have had a thousand problems. Ever since you started sniffing paint."

"NO! This has nothing to do with the sniffing! I-I think I'm gay."

"Good for you," mumbled Anne. "That's not my problem."

"But..I thought you would try to help me, Sister Dearest!" said Makoto earnestly.

"I don't care," mumbled Anne again. "That's not my job."

"BUT IT IS OURS!!!!!!" Suddenly the wall to Makoto's kitchen caved in and a girl and dot walked in. "My name is Amanda! And this little dot is Emo Ant Emma!"

"Hello," said Emo Ant Emma.

"Our job is to help cute gays like you find other cute gays (and pick up some guys on the way for our needs ahem). Together we are. AMANDA AND EMO ANT EMMA ALLIANCE TO HELP CUTE GAYS!"

...And since I sent the rest to my friend (Amanda) and didn't save the document when I wrote it, I will leave you at that exciting part! The rest will be posted at the end of chapter 13. Well, that's all I can write out of carpal tunnel for now! But...THANK YOU CELECHAN FOR THE PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE HOW YOU DREW MAKOTO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like I should give you twenty dollars or something for drawing it, but I don't have that much and I have no way to send it to you. Anyways, THANK YOU AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!! And thank you to anyone who read this chapter! Sorry it came out so late! Bye bye, from Emo Ant Emma.


	13. Chapter 13

Noyem had always believed that the gate wanted to kill her. It stood ominously with its glistening chains strung in spider web patterns. The chains looked to be weighed down as if some invisible prisoner was suffering beneath their coiling heaviness. There were even two fake padlocks on either side like colorless eyes watching her approach.

She always began shaking as soon as she saw it. Her hands clenched to her skirt, her vision turned into a tunnel that stared straight ahead.

The gate to the LeKeya mansion waited to be opened. And only Noyem had the single key to the grounds of the estate of the once famed judge of Gadoria, Mercy.

"So, we've arrived?" asked a voice from behind Noyem. Noyem jolted. That voice always sent an electrical charge through her body. Jay stood behind Noyem. Further behind him were the carriages that held his comrades still waiting in the carriages; Senel looking expressionlessly out his window with a chattering Shirley beside him, Chloe giving Noyem a scrutinizing stare from her seat, Will appreciating the gate. In the other carriage Norma and Moses were spying on Noyem and Jay trying to act as if they weren't watching to see what horribly unromantic and perhaps perverted scene would take place.

"Welcome home, Jay," said Noyem softly as she took the step forward to unlock the gate.

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So… what am I suppose to put in these intros again? Oh yes, I remember I thinks. I OWN NOTHING OF NOTHING. Every word, thought, idea, and ponytail you see here is owned NOT by me. However, if there may by chance by an original idea from my own head in this it will be marked as "DragonQuester's crappy plot and characters. Tequila Moca, I mean Trade Mark." ANYWAYS, so yes it's official, this story is to be continued!.... just don't expect… anything. Lower your standards when reading this please, it would really help my self-confidence level. Moving away from my zero lack of self dignity (which I proved to be so little by actually continuing this) I have excellent news! These intros are going to be shorter now, and the endings are going to have less of a fourth wall interruption and random out of character outburst are going to lessen…

Jay (just happens to notice who's in his trailer): WHY? WHY MUST I BE MADE TO SUFFER THROUGH THIS AGAIN, I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!

DragQue: What did I just say? Thanks to you nothing at all is gonna change in this horrible fanfic ! *kazaps Jay with divine bustier*

ANYWAYS, without more casualties, let the story begin… re-begin.

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Noyem could feel all the stress just floating out of her body. She sighed contently and turned her designer sunglasses up to the cloudless sky. Everything felt so perfect for the moment. Beside her on another cushioned lounge chair laid Norma sipping a hopefully non-alcoholic (cuz nobody wants to see Bubbles get too bubbly) pink fruit drink. Across from Norma's chair Chloe was stretched out on a flat shelf directly out in the sun. On the corresponding shelf from Chloe's relaxed the sun-bathing Shirley. All the girls were unwinding around the central garden of the mansion. Beautiful flowers of gold, ruby red, and deep blue swayed in the breeze on the green. Water bubbled up from the marble fountain with a single delicate swan drifting in motion with the flora. From their positions the girls could gaze into the clear water of the fountain and even run their hands across the surface.

Noyem couldn't remember feeling so worry free before. Usually there was so much on her mind. What with her barrage of seven persons all following her expecting her to escort them to Gadoria, she had felt so overwhelmed. Her mind had been full of so much anxiety. She finally felt like she could let it all go and have peace.

"Yammy, be a good host and get me more strawberry punch," demanded Norma. She held out her drink and shook it. The ice rattled inside, jarring Noyem from her reverie. Noyem lifted her sunglasses off her amber eyes and gave a squint Norma.

"I never admitted be good at anything. You'll have to be a dear and fetch it yourself."

"C, you're closest to the bar. Couldn't you…?"

Chloe mumbled from her position. "I refilled your drink last time."

"Shirl_, _you're _so_ sweet."

"But if I move now, Norma, I might mess up my tan," complained Shirley. She turned her head to see how her back was tanning. So far it was as perfect white as ever. Shirley frowned.

Noyem smiled to herself. Seeing Shirley displeased pleased her greatly. "You're beginning to form a tiny tanning line… You just have to look really closely."

Shirley sat up and twisted her head to stare at her back. She searched desperately for any sign of darkening skin. Noyem snickered to herself. Norma gave Noyem a disappointed glare. She clapped her hands in the air. "Enough talk, drink time!" Shirley stopped her fruitless examination. "Oh, I have an idea." Shirley took a deep breath and screamed into the air "SENEL!"

Not two seconds later did Senel come slamming into the glass doors that lead to the garden. "Shirley, what is it?!" He searched the area frantically for any danger; his eyes never wandering to the bare skin Chloe, Shirley, and Norma were showing off in their string bikinis. On the inside of the door Noyem could see a black ponytail hanging around the corner. _"So Jay is beckoned by love's true screeching call…" _she thought.

"Could you fetch Norma some more juice, Senel? And get me some too, please? Thank you!" Shirley smiled radiantly. Senel calmed down enough and agreed to fetch the drinks. As he walked over to deliver Norma's order he mumbled under his breath. "This whole trip's been a complete joke so far."

Noyem bit her lip. She had thought that their stay at Lekeya mansion was going fantastic. She went back to a day ago.

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"This… this isn't a mansion, it's a castle!" exclaimed Chloe as she stepped out of the carriage. Senel and Shirley followed after with Will and Quppo behind them. Senel's eyed widened. "It's huge," he breathed. "It's… how would you say it Noyem? Magnifque?" asked Shirley. Will took it in with a hushed whisper. "Even Ameila's family mansion was nothing like this." Chloe stood beside Noyem and fixed her eyes on the manor. "I haven't seen anything like this… for years."

Norma hopped out of 's cart with Pippo and Poppo in her arms. "We get to stay in a snazzy place like this? I am so getting into Jay's momma's will while we're here." She dropped the otters and began straightening her satin yellow dress as if preparing herself for an audience with Mercy. Moses whistled as he joined Norma. "Jay, you didn't tell me you're stinkin' rich!"

Against the blazing setting sunset, the Lekeya estate waited for them. The mansion was a shadow within itself. It had a dark inviting beauty about it. There was no symmetrical pattern to the domain, spirals and balconies were spaced at varying locations along the roof. The material that had created the mastery work of art was all the same. Black stones held a dark appealing patina with sparse patches of ivy clinging to the amethyst wall. The windows were tall with stain glass creating patches of tinted light. Each window had painfully detailed scenes from Gadoria's past: a knight slashing down a foe, a king hailing his people, and a princess taking a seat at court. Oddly, an out of place wooden tower sat hunched alongside the west side of the manor, no window or door allowing entry.

With everyone out of the carriages, Mr. Dick and Rick slapped their whips against the horses and left the party standing there. "Wait, what about our bags?" questioned Senel. "The dinky duo will take care of it," answered Noyem. "All I have to do is get everyone inside." Noyem grinned and grabbed Norma's hand. With a squeal she began to twirl. Together they began spinning in circles around the group. "I've finally done it! My lifelong mission is complete!" sang Noyem. Norma laughed, "Now the only thing left for you is marrying Jay!"

Jay stuck out his foot at just the right interval causing Noyem and Norma to trip and fall over each other. Norma caught herself, but Noyem just plopped onto the cobblestone. Once her face hit the ground, Noyem grabbed Jay's foot. She tackled his leg, trying to bring him down with her. To her luck, Jay was tired and not up to his complete adept skill, so he collapsed on top of her. "Now for our little tête-á-tête in each other's arms where we devote our eternal devotion to our single goal of –"

"I would never devote any single part of myself to you," growled Jay as he pushed himself off Noyem. Noyem whimpered like a hurt puppy, "Not even the single part of you I want to play with the most?"

Jay appeared to be sick. Will shot Noyem a warning glance. Noyem immediately stood up, went over to Will, and pat him on the back. "You're just like a nanny, MCHammer, But you can relax here. Imagine your entire stay here as a vacation!"

"I thought we came to meet Mercy and to find out if Jay's her son?" said Shirley. Noyem put her arm around Will and turned to Shirley. "Of course, but the madam will reward you greatly for keeping her precious Jay-Boy all snuggly" she rubbed Will's head, "safe for her."

"REWARD?!" screamed Norma and Moses at the same time. They gave open mouth stares at one another then looked to the mansion. Moses started to drool. Gold seemed to glistened in Norma's eyes. Quppo, Pippo, and Poppo rushed up to steps that lead to the double oak door. "Let's hurry inside!" said Pippo. "I want my reward for having to bath Jay every day when he 12," grumbled Poppo.

Noyem rushed up the steps. She twirled with a flourish to face her audience. "My darlings come in and enjoy the wonderful comforts of the Lekeya manor!" She took the key she used to open the gate and pressed it into the lock on the door. "Mercy, I'm home!"

"Get your freak show out of her here!" yelled an elderly voice. On the other side of the door a gray haired woman stuck her head out. She held a mop in one hand brandishing a bucket with the other. Her voice was worn and tired. Wrinkles creased her face.

"?" exclaimed Noyem. She opened the door wider. Then she threw up her arms and hugged the old woman tightly. "How I've missed your horrid voice!" "Ah, HELP! ASSAULT!" The woman began beating Noyem with her bucket while Noyem wrapped her arms around the frail figure. "Calm down, Mrs. Weatherly, it's me Noyem. I've brought some guests to the manor." Mrs. Weatherly gave the group a thorough examination. She spat out of the corner of her mouth. "Hm, it's been about a month since we've seen you last. About time you came. Well, get inside."

Senel motioned for Jay to step up first. Jay led everyone inside the antechamber of the grand hall. If the outside appearance of the manor was otherworldly stunning, the inside was breathtaking. Glass chandeliers dangled from the ceiling in arrangements that created crystal figurine in the sky. The walls had mirrors running the length of the room giving the illusion of endless floors.

"So he's your toy of the week?" asked pointing at Senel. Noyem shook her head side to side quickly. "No way, not him. The lucky stud's this guy." Noyem grabbed Jay's hand and they stood before like a newlywed couple, just with a very unhappy groom. "Tiny isn't he?" mused . Noyem nodded as Jay threw her hand out of his. "You know what they say about short men, they're more energetic where it counts." "You know what else they say about shorties…" Noyem could tell by Jay's face that he wasn't going to get along with .

"So you're a maid here?" asked Chloe. Mrs. Weatherly nodded proudly standing in the archway that went into the grand hall. "I'm the only maid here," she answered. "Now follow me, I see Mr. Dick and Rick already moving your belongings to the guest quarters."

"Wow, Jay, this whole place is yours," commented Shirley. Jay examined a small crack in a mirror but didn't reply. Noyem needed an excuse to rape him mentally. "Jay, this mansion is yours with complete staff and furnishings. Along with me. Think of me as your own vibrating chair." Success. Jay's eyes widened in shock. Moses shook his head in shame. "A girl offers you a lap dance and you don't even make a single move. Pity." "I wasn't offering him a lap dance!" retorted Noyem. "I offered him to give me a lap dance!" "I think I just walked into hell," despaired Jay.

Jay, Noyem, Senel, Shirley, Chloe, Will, Norma, Moses, and the otters entered the grand hall. Magnificent paintings were strung the lavender walls. Comfortable afternoon-tea-time furniture was placed in the corners of the room. Nine hallways branched off leading to the north, east, and west sides of the manor. Mrs. Weatherly stood at an east wing entrance. "Now, I'm afraid I have some bad news," she said. "The mistress isn't currently here. She was called away for her court duties." "How long do you think she'll be gone?" asked Will. "She could arrive back in a few hours or even a few weeks," replied Noyem. "You never know what kind of case she'll have. We'll just have to take control of the manor while she's gone!"

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"What was it like being the empowered ultimate blonde evil betraying insane wacko mermaid Muhammad?" asked Noyem. The girls had moved into one of the dressing rooms near the garden. The room was large enough to be a house itself. Chic expensive swimsuits hung on racks that made an endless labyrinth of clothing. Shirley and Chloe were inside the changing rooms putting back on their regular clothing.

"For the last time, the title's called Merines," corrected Chloe. "Be a little more empathetic when you're listening to her story. It was a very trying time for us all back then especially Shirley." Noyem wiggled in her chair uncomfortably. She didn't know why Shirley had begun telling her story back in the garden. Noyem had listen for an hour about Shirley and Senel's arrival on the Legacy, her constant kidnappings by Moses, a Ferines named Walter, and the war hungry Vaclav, and lastly the death of Stella and Fenimore. Noyem didn't know what to say to a story like that. She had never wanted to hear anyone's back story anyway. But Norma and Chloe had joined in telling their point of view of the story. Norma had ended story time by explaining how her friend Grune had left for her goddess duties. That particular story had left a knot inside Noyem's gut.

"Being the Merines… was like living in a nightmare. I felt Nerifes's vast rage, suffer, and hatred pounding through my body. It was like nothing could ever quell it. The seething fury coursed throughout by veins like blood. I was empty as if I had lost all that I once had. Nothing mattered to me but the Wings of Light. I was hollow, but terribly afraid. Afraid that I would lose all that mattered to me again." Shirley stepped out of the dressing room in her white coat, skirt, and vest. She looked at Noyem sadly. "It's actually a relief to say this all to somebody who doesn't take it seriously."

"Er, you're welcome. Noyem will listen to any ramblings no matter how emotional or traumatizing," Noyem mumbled awkwardly. Norma appeared out of her dressing room in her yellow dress. She had had teary eyes from talking about Grune, but afterwards she seemed rejuvenated. "Let's go get Red and have him tell her about Spot," she suggested. "I remember the guys said they were gonna hang out in the east library."

The girls walked back towards the main building. Norma continued chatting with Shirley and Chloe while Noyem followed behind silently. She listened to their conversation but didn't take it in. A wave of guilt washed over her. She was so close to her goal, but what price would the others pay for coming here? They had had such adventurous lives so far. Noyem was jealous.

They walked into the breezy open library. Three stories of walls lined with nothing but books extended to a glass ceiling. A wall had been taken away allowing a view of another lovely garden. Will could be seen on the top floor sitting at a desk piled with books. Pippo, Poppo, and Quppo ran back and forth grabbing books and putting them back on the shelf or delivering more books onto the table. "I'd like the next volume of _Gadoria's Tragedy: a Collection of Royal Mishaps_, Quppo," said Will absentmindedly as he flipped through the pages of a thick encyclopedia. "Right away!" replied Quppo as he hurried off to grab the ordered book.

"Looks like Raynard made himself at home," commented Chloe. Norma and Shirley laughed. "Now where's JJ, Senny, and Red," said Norma. "There they are playing some sort of game," said Shirley.

Near the veranda that led outside, Moses, Senel, and Jay were concentrating on a triangular checkered board. Senel and Jay appeared to be playing, slowly moving pieces from one side to the next across the game. Moses sat watching with a chin resting on his hand, actually looking intelligent.

"It's your move, Senel," offered Jay as he leaned back in his chair to watch his opponent squirm. "Or are you too scared you'll lose yet another knight to my hangman's strategy?"

"You might have beat Moses in under thirty seconds, Jay, but you're not getting me that easily," retorted Senel as he confidently thrust a red piece closer to Jay's black knight. Jay threw back his head and laughed as he maneuvered one piece in several jumps taking out three of Senel's pieces. Senel's face fell in defeat.

"What's up, guys?" asked Norma as they neared the table. Noyem decided to lighten her mood. She grabbed Jay's side ponytail and kissed it. "Hope you're not having too much fun without me," she teased. Jay slapped her hand away. He was back in his purple (uh, ninja? Hardly) clothes. A day ago everyone had agreed to save their formal clothes for when Mercy came back.

"We're trying to beat Jay in a game of King's Folly," answered Moses. "So far… Jay's won every time."

"How many times did he defeat you, Moses?" asked Shirley.

"Um….eheh… just a couple of games."

"One hundred and twenty five," answered Jay. "He wouldn't stop asking for replays until Senel pushed him out of the chair."

"How boring, I can't believe you guys are just sitting here getting your butts beaten by JJ," scoffed Norma. "We need something fun that we can all do together."

"How about we go out shopping?" suggested Noyem, glad to get away from the game. She was horrible at King's Folly.

"Brilliant!" shouted Norma. "Let's go find Mr.D and R and ask them to take us to town. C'mon, Teach, let's get out of this stuffy library." Taken with the idea Chloe, Shirley, Senel, Will, the Oresoren, and Moses followed Norma's lead outside. Noyem grabbed Jay's shoulder before he could leave.

Jay winced as if he knew something Noyem-glomping related was coming. "What now?" he asked.

"Jay," began Noyem. The earlier feeling of guilt washed over her again. She had to ask Jay to get the trepidation off her chest. "What if, what if everything I've told you so far has been a lie? How can you so blindly trust me?"

"I'm not putting any trust in you," said Jay bluntly. "Now what are you talking about? How has everything been a lie?"

Noyem sighed in relief. "You know what, I was just talking. Ignore me. Now let's go catch up with everyone."

Jay eyed Noyem suspiciously. He stood up and walked after Norma and the others. Noyem stayed behind and watched him leave. Her betrayal so far was going smoothly, but her heart beat painfully within her.

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ARGH, I am so outta practice. THIS WHOLE CHAPTER WAS ONLY FIVE PAGES LONG. And the ending was awful!

WAH! WAH! WAH! I must apologize for the lameness, lack of anything entertaining, and general horribleness of this chapter. My sense of humor has been deadened by my skitso medication. (stares at pill box) Let's see… may cause extreme sense of self-doubt, over exhaustion, burned retinas, toe extraction, and…. Lame writing style with no sense of mood, characterization, or general plot. YAY! I can blame everything on my mental disorder now! That's was this chapter was so extremely nearly three years late. I was too busy napping without my toes. Everything is sensible again.

As planned this terribly written fanfic will go on even if I only have one view per chapter. I'm just not satisfied to leave this unfinished. When this fanfic is finally done I'm going to move on to more Tales of Legendia fanfics. I have read the Tales of Symphonia manga (on foxy) and some parts of Abyss and Vesperia but I must say I'm still a big TOL fan. Now, Tales of Symphonia had the BEST original storyline I have ever seen, but it had some repetition (having to kill humans who had turned into monsters) and some sketchy parts I didn't really get (okayosh, they were making summon pacts with the Seed Guys but they only did it for one world… and HOW EXACTLY DID A LITTLE BOY CREATE TWO WORLDS? And what exactly did Yuan want? Just to release Origin's seal?). As for Abyss, ehhhh the chapters skip around and to say it bluntly the characters really annoy me. I stopped reading it after awhile. People say it's the best Tales of game so maybe I'll buy it… but I need my money for DragonQuest DS games. Veserpia looks interesting I'm definitely gonna keep reading it (mainly because Yuri looks like an older version of Jay). OH, and I bought Tales of Phantasia (for the GBA) and played through it in like a weekend. Not so full of the laughter, plot twists, and ass kickingness of TOL and TOS. But I loved the characters. Especially Chester and Arche. If anyone wants to, they can email me and I'll give ya my yahoo or AOL IM name so we can chat and rant about Tales of game (but you must also be prepared to hear the great ramblings of my DragonQuest love).

Ah, it's so nice to end a chapter without any interruptions...

Harriet: Are you sure of that?

DraQue: AH! Why do midgets from video games keep coming to assault me?

Harriet: I'm here by order of my father. He heard a very alarming rumor.

DraQue: Oh, and what was that?

Harriet: Are you going to move on to a story about his background after this?

DraQue: Why, yes I was planning to write how him and Ameila met when I finished up with this crappy OC fanfic.

Harriet: My father wishes to sue you.

Ahem, well, that ended on a nice note. Anyways, sorrry this chapter was so short. Expect the next chapter in about two weeks, and don't worry, I WILL MAKE IT LONGER. I just need to practice my writing fondu more... and stop ending chapters on really lame lines. Anyways, if you read and you want to vehemt your anger unto me, please do so. Reviews keep fanfic writers alive. Even the really bad ones. So, good day everyone, let me float away on my Mary Popkins umbrella and prepare the next chapter.


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